Mary Anne + 2 Many Babies Part The End!
Since Cabby is sleeping in my spot, I can't lay down and go to sleep even though I'm going out tomorrow and can't oversleep. Plus I'm listening to music and keep telling myself 'Just one more song'. I feel like I need to tell my therapist about this. 'You don't understand! They think eggs can feel! They think they're alive!' Anyway, let's finish this crap up!
Part 1!
Part 2!
Chapter 11
Would you rather have a recap of Mal and Dawn's sitting for the Pikes and them wanting egg babies and wasting food or would you rather have a stupid fitting gif? I'll assume the latter.
Chapter 12
In modern living class and Shawna Riverson (the idiot with the wedding cake toppers) wants a divorce. She says it's not working out and everyone but MA and Logan snicker. Because they're the only ones stupid enough to take this seriously. Shawna says her 'husband' Miles dumps all the care for their stupid egg on her. And when she says she almost left it home and had to go back for it, MA takes this to mean she cares about her egg. No, Mary Anne, she cares about her grade. Only you and the BSC think it's a real baby.
Another couple named Angela and Kevin raise their hand and Angela is crying. It turns out they lost their egg at the park. How a fucking egg made it out of a fucking closed cookie tin I have no idea. And how it got far enough from said container that it couldn't be found I also have no idea. What the Hell kinda eggs are these that they keep escaping their containers?! Do we really have to add eggs to things Ann knows nothing about?! Eggs are not known for their mobility! Also as an Angela I'm insulted. I would not weep over a damn egg. I would be upset about failing and even then not really. Why are Angelas in these books either dumb or a bitch?
After class MA and Logan talk about how they're not the only ones with problems. MA goes to get their egg and Logan is like 'nope' even though he has gym so he's not even going to be watching the damn thing. God, Mary Anne, just dump him already! He obviously doesn't respect you! He actually thinks he'll do a better job while running around a basketball court than you would just sitting at home. Kick his ass to the curb!
Chapter 13
Another sitting job at the Salem's and excuse me while I scream into Jynxie's belly. MA actually says she will only have to deal with two babies. You fucking idiot. AN EGG IS NOT A BABY!! You don't need to take caring for it to that extreme! If you were smart, Mary Anne, you would take your experience with the twins and use it to write up what you did for your egg. But no! You play pretend with a damned food product so hard that you think it's an actual living, breathing, attention needing baby, you stupid fuck-wit.
I'm seriously skimming right now because I don't give a fuck about babies. Especially when they're screaming and snot covered. MA actually has so much trouble with them she calls Dawn for help. This just screams to me that these girls shouldn't be sitting infants.
Chapter 14
At the Spier-Schafer house everyone is exhausted and they miss a phone call because no one wants to get up. Dawn says maybe someone was calling to leave them and island and brilliant Mary Anne says, 'A tropical island?' No, MA one of the ones in the Arctic Ocean. Now I'm generally okay with Mary Anne but my God, is she stupid. The phone rings again and...and oh, God. Why why WHY am I allergic to alcohol?! Probably because if I drank for every stupid moment in this book I'd die of alcohol poisoning in the first chapter. It's Logan and he says...he says...give me a moment. Look at the kitty with the banana.
He says that the fucking egg took it's first steps. Just how much LSD is in Stoneybrook's drinking water? 99.99%? NO ONE ACTS LIKE THIS! No one! No one is that fucking insane! Anyway, they get to talking and make up and who cares. MA says that she's glad they didn't give them real babies because she's an idiot and thinks that's plausible. They also talk about how hard it is to be an adult and I can't fault them there. I do fault their stupid teacher though for not assigning them jobs so they still think they have to figure out how to live on baby-sitting wages. Seriously, what the fuck was up with that?
Chapter 15
They last session of the modern living class. They'll be moving on to health and one boy comments that that should include sex ed. Pretty racy for an Ann book! I was pretty sure that she thought the cabbage patch was based on a real live incident. Of course, none of this will come up because won't someone think of the children!
MA an Logan turn in a-'32 pages long, typed, single-spaced' paper and wow. I would not give that much a fuck about this stupid class. I would have just turned in a Post-It that said, "I can't afford shit without a job. I hate babies. I'm fucking 13.' For a final assignment they have to write about what happens when their 'children' have grown and what they did with their lives. Yeah, I would still give fuck-all about that paper and be like 'Stupid baby grew up to be a crazy person. You can catch him on the corner of Baseline and 5th yelling at pigeons about stealing his snow tires.'
Good God-'“Logan,” I whispered, feeling tearful, “Sammie doesn’t need us anymore. She’s going to leave us!”' Mary Anne, you are a fucking crazy person! Keep a lookout on your snow tires! Those pigeons are sneaky bastards! If I saw someone crying about a fucking egg I'd send them this-
They decide their egg will live in New York because omg! New York! It'll be an editor. You know, those things Ann never hires because she's certifiable and shit like this gets published?
At the BSC meeting they all blithering about what their stupid eggs grew up to be. The only one that's semi believable is Kristy's who ends up being a mechanic. All the others are curing cancer and shit. Kinda weird that Kristy's kid didn't become Grand High Dictator of a day care or something equally grandiose.
They all comment about how they're gonna have babies when they're older and so what? Don't they know they'll never get older? Mal is also insane because she wants to have 8 kids just like her mom. Poor Mallory, she must crave a life of servitude due to how she's treated. They're all starry-eyed at the thought of having kids and I roll my eyes because that's the last thing I'd ever want. I don't even take care of my Sims babies.
At home, they prepare dinner and Sharon says they should eat in the dining room. She talks about how MA and Dawn were asking about her and Richard having a baby causing quiet panic. But instead she says they were talking about it and if the girls want they can get another pet. Why they don't immediately agree and get a pug is beyond me. MA says they changed their mind on the baby and that they (Richard and Sharon) have no idea how hard it is being a parent! Ah hahahahaha! Laugh track freeze frame shotgun blast!
Wow, that was stupid! I'm a little stunned here. What was Ann thinking? These are not the actions of a normal teen! Has she never met a teen in her life? Again, Ann is a lizard person whose only info on teens is back episodes of the Patty Duke show. So, next up will be Dawn Saves the Planet because I'm a glutton for pain. But at least there's no babies and it's fun to make fun of Dawn. Thanks for reading!
Part 1!
Part 2!
Chapter 11
Would you rather have a recap of Mal and Dawn's sitting for the Pikes and them wanting egg babies and wasting food or would you rather have a stupid fitting gif? I'll assume the latter.
Chapter 12
In modern living class and Shawna Riverson (the idiot with the wedding cake toppers) wants a divorce. She says it's not working out and everyone but MA and Logan snicker. Because they're the only ones stupid enough to take this seriously. Shawna says her 'husband' Miles dumps all the care for their stupid egg on her. And when she says she almost left it home and had to go back for it, MA takes this to mean she cares about her egg. No, Mary Anne, she cares about her grade. Only you and the BSC think it's a real baby.
Another couple named Angela and Kevin raise their hand and Angela is crying. It turns out they lost their egg at the park. How a fucking egg made it out of a fucking closed cookie tin I have no idea. And how it got far enough from said container that it couldn't be found I also have no idea. What the Hell kinda eggs are these that they keep escaping their containers?! Do we really have to add eggs to things Ann knows nothing about?! Eggs are not known for their mobility! Also as an Angela I'm insulted. I would not weep over a damn egg. I would be upset about failing and even then not really. Why are Angelas in these books either dumb or a bitch?
After class MA and Logan talk about how they're not the only ones with problems. MA goes to get their egg and Logan is like 'nope' even though he has gym so he's not even going to be watching the damn thing. God, Mary Anne, just dump him already! He obviously doesn't respect you! He actually thinks he'll do a better job while running around a basketball court than you would just sitting at home. Kick his ass to the curb!
Chapter 13
Another sitting job at the Salem's and excuse me while I scream into Jynxie's belly. MA actually says she will only have to deal with two babies. You fucking idiot. AN EGG IS NOT A BABY!! You don't need to take caring for it to that extreme! If you were smart, Mary Anne, you would take your experience with the twins and use it to write up what you did for your egg. But no! You play pretend with a damned food product so hard that you think it's an actual living, breathing, attention needing baby, you stupid fuck-wit.
I'm seriously skimming right now because I don't give a fuck about babies. Especially when they're screaming and snot covered. MA actually has so much trouble with them she calls Dawn for help. This just screams to me that these girls shouldn't be sitting infants.
Chapter 14
At the Spier-Schafer house everyone is exhausted and they miss a phone call because no one wants to get up. Dawn says maybe someone was calling to leave them and island and brilliant Mary Anne says, 'A tropical island?' No, MA one of the ones in the Arctic Ocean. Now I'm generally okay with Mary Anne but my God, is she stupid. The phone rings again and...and oh, God. Why why WHY am I allergic to alcohol?! Probably because if I drank for every stupid moment in this book I'd die of alcohol poisoning in the first chapter. It's Logan and he says...he says...give me a moment. Look at the kitty with the banana.
He says that the fucking egg took it's first steps. Just how much LSD is in Stoneybrook's drinking water? 99.99%? NO ONE ACTS LIKE THIS! No one! No one is that fucking insane! Anyway, they get to talking and make up and who cares. MA says that she's glad they didn't give them real babies because she's an idiot and thinks that's plausible. They also talk about how hard it is to be an adult and I can't fault them there. I do fault their stupid teacher though for not assigning them jobs so they still think they have to figure out how to live on baby-sitting wages. Seriously, what the fuck was up with that?
Chapter 15
They last session of the modern living class. They'll be moving on to health and one boy comments that that should include sex ed. Pretty racy for an Ann book! I was pretty sure that she thought the cabbage patch was based on a real live incident. Of course, none of this will come up because won't someone think of the children!
MA an Logan turn in a-'32 pages long, typed, single-spaced' paper and wow. I would not give that much a fuck about this stupid class. I would have just turned in a Post-It that said, "I can't afford shit without a job. I hate babies. I'm fucking 13.' For a final assignment they have to write about what happens when their 'children' have grown and what they did with their lives. Yeah, I would still give fuck-all about that paper and be like 'Stupid baby grew up to be a crazy person. You can catch him on the corner of Baseline and 5th yelling at pigeons about stealing his snow tires.'
Good God-'“Logan,” I whispered, feeling tearful, “Sammie doesn’t need us anymore. She’s going to leave us!”' Mary Anne, you are a fucking crazy person! Keep a lookout on your snow tires! Those pigeons are sneaky bastards! If I saw someone crying about a fucking egg I'd send them this-
They decide their egg will live in New York because omg! New York! It'll be an editor. You know, those things Ann never hires because she's certifiable and shit like this gets published?
At the BSC meeting they all blithering about what their stupid eggs grew up to be. The only one that's semi believable is Kristy's who ends up being a mechanic. All the others are curing cancer and shit. Kinda weird that Kristy's kid didn't become Grand High Dictator of a day care or something equally grandiose.
They all comment about how they're gonna have babies when they're older and so what? Don't they know they'll never get older? Mal is also insane because she wants to have 8 kids just like her mom. Poor Mallory, she must crave a life of servitude due to how she's treated. They're all starry-eyed at the thought of having kids and I roll my eyes because that's the last thing I'd ever want. I don't even take care of my Sims babies.
At home, they prepare dinner and Sharon says they should eat in the dining room. She talks about how MA and Dawn were asking about her and Richard having a baby causing quiet panic. But instead she says they were talking about it and if the girls want they can get another pet. Why they don't immediately agree and get a pug is beyond me. MA says they changed their mind on the baby and that they (Richard and Sharon) have no idea how hard it is being a parent! Ah hahahahaha! Laugh track freeze frame shotgun blast!
Wow, that was stupid! I'm a little stunned here. What was Ann thinking? These are not the actions of a normal teen! Has she never met a teen in her life? Again, Ann is a lizard person whose only info on teens is back episodes of the Patty Duke show. So, next up will be Dawn Saves the Planet because I'm a glutton for pain. But at least there's no babies and it's fun to make fun of Dawn. Thanks for reading!