First snark attempt - Mary Anne's Makeover Chapters 1-3

[thebsnarkc]

Long time lurker, first time poster. I'm a terrible writer who wants to get better so I figured, I have time why not snark? I've decided to snark one of my favorite books, Mary Anne's Makeover. Why? It's so deliciously catty and so snarkable. To mess up this snark would just be proof that I suck.

Comments

[thelovelymissa]

I never understood the other BSC girls in this book. If Mary Anne wanted to shave her head and dye her eyebrows pink, it's her business. Richard is full of win, though.

I think you missed a few words here: "He will mark the toes of new socks with an X so he won't with older white socks in the laundry."

Great snark! Looking forward to more.

[thebsnarkc]

Corrected it. It he marks the toes of new socks with an X so he won't mix them with older white socks in the laundry. thanks!

[road_baby]

Yay! I'm so glad your're doing this snark! This book is so awful! I wanted to punch Dawn right in her stupid smug crybaby face!

My friends aren't the least bit mean. We're all so close, we can take each other seriously and joke about our personalities

This line just kills me. Not only is it awkward it's foreshadowy as Hell. It's just so poorly written. Even when I was young I thought it was dumb.

Or I'll walk out of the house without my wallet

You think that's bad I sometimes almost leave my room without shoes or pants.

She's also perfect looking and thin despite her eating habits. Yeah, good luck with that in a few years.

Oh, man. I'd give my left eye for Claudia to end up a chubby girl. Personally I think it'd make her cuter. And then she can start a fashion line for heavier girls cuz Jesus Christ is it hard to find cute plus size clothes.

[thebsnarkc]

Yeah, there are a few "foreshadowing" lines in this book and they're all such anvils. I think it either makes Mary Anne look really naive or her friends somehow became extra bitchy. Except Dawn. Dawn has always had an extra helping of bitchy.

[kakeochi_umai]

Great snark!

Turns out Carolyn's just seen Back to the Future and was inspired to make a time machine.
Welp, I am now going to be spending the rest of this evening singing "Triple breasted women swim around town totally naked..."

Carolyn announces to them that when she's done people will be able "to enter the final dimension, through a warp of time"
So the time warp is Carolyn's fault.

[senoritashey]

So the time warp is Carolyn's fault.

This is so full of win. :)

[lisaerin]

Yeah, I skimmed it as a teenager as well, and even then I was like, "WTF?" I don't know if I even skimmed the entire thing. I remember reading about the BSC laughing at Mary Anne wanting to get her haircut and being annoyed. It's ridiculous because the BSC has always gone on about the fact that Mary Anne dresses like a baby. I think they're just mad she did something on her own. They probably wanted to choose her clothes for her as well as her hairstyle.

[lisaerin]

Now I remember Dawn's "you're being mean for spending the day with your father and not inviting me," the most. And what's wrong with boy haircuts?

[gimere]

"My friends aren't the least bit mean."

*falls over laughing* Oh, you silly thing, you.

Claudia, Stacey, and Dawn all proceed to shit on her idea. Laughing at her and being condescending. What a great group of friends.

All three of them can go step on a Lego.