#10 Logan Likes Mary Anne!
I should be busy at work, however I am taking a break because my head hurts. I've been bitten by the snarking bug again, because it's fun. Even though I am not all that good. So, this time, I thought we'd take a look at a classic BSC book - Logan Likes Mary Anne! A milestone for three reasons:
1) We meet a new character
2) We meet Tigger
3) They begin eighth grade for the first time!
Chapter 1
Mary Anne is lamenting the end of summer vacation and how she can’t believe it’s been two months since the end of seventh grade. Neither can I, but the time warp hasn’t taken effect yet. I am also surprised that she isn’t crying. Apparently something important happened to every member of the BSC that summer, but before she tells us that, she has to tell us about the BSC, in case we don’t know. Which I don’t. What is the BSC? What is this book? Who is Mary Anne?
Anyway, they babysit, earn money, gossip and fool around. As I said in previous snarks, their meetings are definitely not just for taking calls, wink wink.
So, Kristy’s mom married a real-live millionaire, except Mary Anne doesn’t mention that bit. Just the mansion. Claudia’s grandmother had a stroke. I actually really love the book Claudia and Mean Janine. Claudia is quite nasty to Janine in it, at times, but the book is realistic, sad and funny. One of the best, I think. Dawn is MA’s best friend and the exciting thing for her was discovering a secret passage in the farmhouse she lives in. Stacey and MA shared summer excitement. Is MA a not-so-closet lesbian? There always seems to be lots of sexual innuendos involving MA. Or, maybe I’m just your typical Brit with a mind in the gutter. Oh, MA has just pointed out that she does actually like boys, as discovered at Sea City! Another book that I loved. You can’t talk about bras and cute boys to boys, apparently. I say ‘wrong!’ I used to discuss bras and cute boys with my ex all the time. Sometimes, he would even point out ‘a very handsome chap.’ I adore my ex.
We have a doorbell affect and it isn’t even a Lerangis (or indeed a ghostwriter) book. Ann M Martin started all the sound effects. And all this time, I’ve been blaming Lernagis. Dawn is at the front door, wearing a ‘snappy’ outfit. Outfit description! I love these!
Hot pink shorts, with a big, breezy island-print shirt over a white tank top.
Presumably, the big breezy shirt is unbuttoned, hence why MA knows Dawn is wearing a white top. But how does she know it’s a tank, without seeing the sleeves?
It came from Dawn’s dad in California, so the girls note not to tell Kristy. Um, why? Sure, you wouldn’t just randomly say ‘This top is from Cali,’ but if Kristy were to ask, why not tell? Her dad has been gone a long time and although it was a horrible thing to happen, Kristy is not emotional or over sensitive about people getting stuff from Cali.
And YES, here we go. MA checks the mailbox as they go to Claudia’s and shrieks ‘Aughh’ at discovering Sixteen magazine in the mailbox. She perves at Cam Geary. I get annoyed at the shriek. Seriously, why shriek over a magazine?
The girls go over to Claud’s and as this is before the days of the door being left unlocked, they ring the bell and Mimi lets them in. MA panics as they are last. Ah, the start of the BSC Dictatorship under Kristy.
This is a long chapter 1. The girls do typical meeting stuff and discuss boys. And bras. MA is shocked at the size of a female star’s chest at age 14. MA is obsessed. Several meetings are scheduled and the girls are depressed that it’s back to school tomorrow.
Chapter 2
MA is ready for eighth grade, for the first time! She explains that she has chewing gum so she can chew it and then use it to stick Cam Geary’s picture up in her locker. Disgusting. Why not use blu-tak? Then she sulks about not being thirteen for several more weeks. Shut up, MA. Then she starts gloating about being eighth graders being the older in the school and the fact they’ll have a graduation in June and go to high school. Shut up, MA. You will graduate in June (or is it July?) after you’ve been through summer several times. You will not actually go to high school. Stacey talks in a Porky Pig voice. I love Stacey’s pig love. MA chews her gum (ick ick ick ew ew ew) and sticks Cam Geary in her locker before going to homeroom, where she worries over where to sit, then worries about her schedule. They go to lunch, Dawn has a bag lunch but Kristy and MA think this is babyish. Why? I’d rather bring my own lunch too. And why does Stacey buy lunch? Surely it would make more sense for her to brown-bag, because of her diabeetus. And where the bleep is the typical chapter 2?
Anyway, Stacey and Claud sit with Kristy, MA and Dawn. It is the beginning of the BSC clique as we know it. There’s a lot of milestones in this book. It’s early, it’s good, but the foundations of the BSC foundations are being laid down. It’s rather interesting to watch this unravel.
Dawn’s healthy lunch of strawberries, yoghurt, granola, dried apple slices and something apparently unidentifiable sounds much tastier than noodles in a mushroom and cream sauce, resembling glue. Ugh. MA had gym earlier and wants Kristy to smell her. Weird.
Then she gets excited upon her first glance of Cam Geary aka Logan Bruno. MA is in love already and jealous of Stacey because she already met him.
Chapter 3
It’s Friday, second day back at school and the first meeting of eighth grade. Everyone was nearly late, apparently. Kristy wants to advertise more because of the PTA. Kristy, if you’re so busy already, do you need to advertise?
Kristy acknowledges the fact that someone else had a great idea. In this case, Dawn suggesting that they make fliers for parent to put on their fridge doors. Except, it is terrific, not great. MA suggests advertising in Kristy’s new neighbourhood. Kristy says they are all snobs. Judgemental, much?
MA lusts after Logan and she says she got a bra yesterday. Kristy gapes at MA. Kristy, if you feel left out, go buy one of those 28AAAAAAA sizes, or something.
Chapter 4
I am feeling unsettled at the lack of chapter twoness and the unstructured approach.
Claudia calls an emergency meeting and tells MA to tell Kristy. They meet at lunch. Today, it is macaroni and cheese, with broccoli, canned fruit salad and milk. I dislike milk, but all in all, I would eat that. Kristy and MA also buy chocolate éclair popsicles. What the hell is one of those?
Anyway, basically Claudia is answering the phone constantly because people are ringing all the time, including 7.30am. Ouch. These people should use some common sense - 7.30 is a silly time to call. Though, I am generally out the door and on the bus over halfway to work at that time. Claud is also behind on her homework already. What? You’ve hardly been back! She is nearly crying because she doesn’t think she has time for everything.
Claud brought the record book to school and they read Claud’s notes. They have about a million jobs to schedule. MA snarks that Claud’s handwriting is sloppy. Shut up, MA. Sloppy it may be, but I can’t read yours either. The first job is at 6-8 on Friday, as the adults are going to a cocktail party.
At 6-8.
Right.
MA points out that they’re too busy and snarks that Kristy should have thought things through. Maybe, but no one else jumped in either. Then Logan comes along and says he’s a babysitter. All the girls start to fall in love. I hate the way that they have written out his accent. MA can’t talk though because she is an idiot.
He says hi to Stacey and MA is jealous. They discuss sitting and Kristy invites him to the enxt BSC meeting. Say hello to your friends!
Chapter 5
MA is getting ready for the meeting, including putting on a small pair of hoop earrings. Presumably, clip ons, but can you get clip on hoop earrings? She also puts on a bright vest over a white top and when she gets to the meeting, they all pick up on her dressing nicely for Logan. He arrives and MA quickly checks that Claud’s room is safe for a boy. God, these girls panic far too much over things. Logan sits on the floor and MA goes back to being mute. A job comes in and she keeps dropping the appointment book. I know people get nervous, but is this normal?!
Claud starts telling the story of Pete Black and the Bra Strap. And everyone blushes. Popcorn is spilt and Logan and Stacey knock heads. Oh, the horrors! MA is overreacting about all of this. Logan also starts a story he can’t finish. Augh. I am annoyed. This is painful. A new client calls. It is Mrs Rodowsky and even Kristy manages to stare at Logan, whilst taking the call. Anyway, Logan gets the job as a test and MA goes with him to watch.
These test jobs always bugged me.
Chapter 6
It’s D-DAY! And MA manages to…..SPEAK! We’re introduced to Jackie for the first time, who has a pet grasshopper called Elizabeth. Awww. Elizabeth is a boy. Hmmm. Logan charms Mrs R and saves Jackie from ploughing head first into the piano. Jackie goes upstairs to get his grasshopper and Logan makes small talk with MA. There is a crash and they go to find Jackie. Turns out Jackie tried chinning the curtain rod. Logan asks if he’s hurt and he says no. MA shakes her head in disbelief that Logan hasn’t told him not to do it again, or checked him. They go down for juice and MA gives Logan another point for wanting to pour the juice. MA has been mentally scoring Logan. He gained 3 points, but lost 1, so he has 2 points. Jackie spills the juice and Logan cleans it up. MA is impressed. They go to meet Elizabeth and Jackie gets his hand stuck in the jar. Logan to the rescue again. Jackie has many more accidents. Poor Jackie.
They talk about the job when they leave and Logan tells MA she has a pretty smile. Awww.
Chapter 7
A horribly spelt notebook entry from our Claud, though not quite as horrible as usual. She was sitting for the Perfect Perkins and Chewwy the dog. Gabbie wants to be toshed up. Cute. I find Gabbie adorable and felt disappointed that her and Myriah were written out of the books. Gabbie shows Claud her beautiful door with stickers on it and Claud, sensibly thinks it must be hard to be a parent. Which makes a change from the BSC knowing more than parents attitude of later books. A while later, they go to meet Myriah from the bus stop and take Chewy with them. Claud picks Gabbie up and drops Chewy’s leash. Claud, you suck. Chewy is on the loose with Myriah’s schoolbag! Oh, the drama! I love Labradors, I have one and they LOVE to carry things around. So they chase him and one by one, more kids join the chase. Well, Jamie does, anyway.
They can’t catch Chewy, so they go home. Claud gets nervous and later on, the doorbell rings. This bit is all kinds of awesome. It’s a workman wanting his road cones back. Chewy has returned and has amassed a pile of cones in the garden. I love Chewy.
Chapter 8
It’s the meeting to decide Logan’s fate. Mrs R phones for another sitter and no one is free. MA suggests Logan, but Kristy doesn’t want to recommend people who aren’t club members. Shut up, Kristy. It is more professional to recommend someone who would do a good job then to not help out at all. MA changes her plans and agrees to sit. Claud passes around Doritos and they think about Logan. MA phones Logan to see if he wants to be in the club and he doesn’t. MA immediately thinks it’s all about her. Stop being self-centered. But then he asks her to a dance, so all is OK again.
But, she is still wanting to know why he doesn’t want to join the club.
Chapter 9
Stacey is sitting for her almost-sister, Charlotte and can’t believe how much she has grown up. She takes the Kid-Kit with her. MA explains what a Kid-Kit is. Charlotte is bouncy and happy and Dr. J is nice enough to ask Stacey how her diabeetus is. She leaves and Stace reads a Dr Seuss story to Charlotte. They talk about birthdays and how MA will soon be 13. Charlotte suggests a party. A surprise party. Stacey is nice enough to say it’s a good idea, but also recognises that MA won’t like it. Charlotte says she should have a party and just have a surprise cake. Stace wanted to have a party anyway and thinks it a good idea. After all, how offended could someone be over a cake? Oh Stace, we about to find out.
Stacey makes lists for her party and plans to ask her guests to bring a date. How sophisticated! MA is going to ask Logan.
Chapter 10
The BSC are going to Bellair’s to buy MA an outfit for the dance. Richard is nice enough to give MA his charge card for a new outfit. Awwww. Stacey, amusingly wants to go to the underwear department. She re-iterates this again later. Why does she need underwear? Stace, you’re a dirty bi-atch.
I love this! It’s time for the famous cities skirt! C’mon on laydees and gents, did anyone else want that skirt? It’s the all time top piece of BSC clothing. Claud picked it out for MA and paired it with a pink shirt and a baggy pink sweater. Eighties, yes, but nonetheless, quite cute sounding. I want the skirt. MA picks out white slip-ons with pink and blue edging to go with the outfit. Richie’s card is taking a hammering. Then, they talk Stacey out of the underwear department.
You know it’s an early book because on Friday, when MA is freaking out, Kristy cancels the meeting and decides to pay Janine to pick up the phone. Kristy late freaks out about the soles of MA’s shoes. Stacey teaches MA to dance. I wonder if it’s pole dancing. Claud gives her tips. Anyway, everyone leaves at 5.30 to get ready, as they’re all going to the dance. Mr Spier drops them all off. He must have a big car. The girls walk to the gym and we get outfit descriptions! Yay!
Claud: Short, tight-fitting black pants and a big white shirt that said BE-BOP all over it in between pictures of rock and roll dancers. She had fixed a floppy blue blow in her hair. So, is she wearing capris, pedal pushers…? Cycling shorts?
Stacey: A white-shirt under a hot pink jumpsuit. I just googled jumpsuit. I am not down with them. Especially in hot pink. And why wear a shirt underneath? This is not sophisticated.
Dawn: A green and white oversized sweater and stretchy green pants.
Kristy: A white turtleneck shirt under a pink sweater with jeans.
How is Dawn’s outfit more casual than Claud’s? And Kristy’s sounds like the most normal. But, I want MA’s skirt.
The dance is a mob scene and MA goes to find Logan. He gives her a squashed orange flower. Like the time my ex gave me a bunch of sunflowers and half of them were dead.
They drink punch and eat cookies. MA can’t think of a thing to say to Logan. She sneaks a look at her watch. Logan asks her to dance. She imitates Logan. Hahaha, MA the mocker. I love it. Eventually, her shoe flies off and just misses the vice-principal. MA overreacts and refuses to dance anymore. Everyone thinks it’s funny and so do I. MA doesn’t. Logan dances with Dawn (foreshadowing for Forever’s Promise! It’s an amazing fan-fic. Go read it) and then goes back to MA, who is being a stroppy cow. I want to strangle her with her famous cities skirt. At the end of the dance, Logan thanks her for coming and says he had fun. He doesn’t make her feel bad about not dancing, because he is not controlling yet. MA is slightly cheered up and thinks that she could try dancing at the next dance.
Chapter 11
This is taking ages.
Logan and MA have been doing stuff! How exciting. Kristy is babysitting one Friday and as usual, Karen and Andrew are also there. She invites Dawn over because MA is busy with Logan. Maybe Dawn and Kristy are having a sordid affair. They both went to the dance stag. Dawn lets herself in and Karen is freaking out about Morbidda Destiny. Poor Mrs Porter. Karen can be a real brat sometimes. Louie licks Dawn’s hand. I love Louie. But he’s getting old. Foreshadowing for next book, sadly.
The kids are playing in the living room and Kristy and Dawn eat graham crackers, whilst telling erotic stories about Logan and MA to each other. These girls are far too interested in everyone else’s love life. DM is cheating at Memory. Karen took a turn before Andrew was done. WHY CAN’T THESE KIDS DO ANYTHING WITHOUT ARGUING?
Kristy is depressed as she feels people are growing up without her.
The kids go to bed and Dawn and Kristy are sitting next to each other on Kristy’s bed. They’re discussing presents for MA’s birthday. They don’t want her to be embarrassed opening presents in front of boys. *head desk* Then they don’t know who to invite, but Dawn confesses to finding a boy called Bruce cute. Then they lean back against their pillows. Dawn and Kristy like-like each other.
Chapter 12
Logan rings MA and tells her to watch Meatballs. The movie that inspired them all to go to camp. They have a boring phone conversation. MA is freaking out that she has been on the phone too long when Stace rings. Stace orders her to call Logan and invite him to the party. MA says she can’t because of the phone rule. Stace patiently explains it’s only 10 minutes per call, so make lots of calls. She calls her dad for permission to go to the party who says yes and then she calls to invite Logan. Who still isn’t sure about the BSC. Then Kristy calls. Who hangs up because she’s getting another call. And I’m getting confused.
Chapter 13
MA wears her new outfit again. Stace has apparently told her that the party is no longer at 6.00pm, but 6.30 and stops her from calling Logan. This is odd, because if only the cake is a surprise and the party isn’t, why have you invited her to come late? My head hurts. MA gets there at 6.45 and everyone else is already there. Stace explains that they were all early. The kids are messing around with food, Logan is pleased to see MA, MA is feeling uncomfortable and there is a prank call about pig farms. Is this the first pig farm prank call of the series?
Logan goes to get food and Alan wants to play Spin the Bottle. HA! This would never have featured in a later BSC book. Logan says he is happy to get to know the real MA, which is very sweet but not very much like something a 13 year old would say.
Stacey dims the lights to make things more romantic. Stacey is a hussy.
After pizza time (MA and Logan are hogging the couch) a cake comes in and people sing Happy Birthday. Awww, everyone likes MA.
So, she does the only thing a girl could do in the situation.
Freak out and run away!
Chapter 14
Richie is concerned about MA being home so early (what would he be like if she was late?) and she explains it wasn’t a good party. He feels sorry for her. MA goes to her room, but isn’t ready to sleep yet.
Oh, MA has pointed out why she was asked to arrive later - so she wouldn’t notice the gifts.
She is a real ungrateful madam in this book. We get it, we know you’re shy and don’t like being the centre of attention. Neither do I. But, your friends realised this, hence why the whole party wasn’t a surprise. They wanted to do something nice for you. She’s also angsty at Logan. She thinks no one takes her seriously. MA, again, they did it because they LIKE you.
Oh, she finally realises that they wanted to do something nice, but she blames them anyway.
Then she gets annoyed because no one calls her and she goes to sleep, after deciding to ask for a cat. MA is clearly going to be a crazy cat lady when she’s older.
She falls asleep in her clothes and doesn’t get up until 9.00am. She goes downstairs to her father and asks for a cat. She explains that it’s to keep her company. Richie agrees, but she has to buy half the stuff needed and get a cat from a shelter. One of my old cats came from the RSPCA. She was the snobbiest cat ever.
MA rings Logan, who thankfully, still wants to have teenage kicks right through the night with her and he agrees to pick out a cat with her. I am resisting the urge to use slang which could be interpreted as something else. Ahem.
They go to the shelter and MA picks out a grey tiger cat because she always wanted one. She names it Tigger. Tigger is the most common cat name ever. Tigger cries all the way home - obviously a trait picked up already from his owner. Then, Logan gives MA a silver bracelet for her birthday present. This is gorgeous, but it’s quite a present for two young teens!
Logan invites her to the Fifties Fling. Nearly all is right with the world.
Chapter 15
MA rings Stacey. Stacey says, ‘oh.’ BURN. HAHAHAHA.
Both apologise and both make up. MA tells Stacey about Tigger and she suggests having a special BSC meeting the next day, so that they can all meet him. Aww.
I like the Stacey and MA relationship.
All the BSC come over the next day - with some cake and presents and a whispered ‘surprise.’ Awww. The girls come in to meet Tigger and MA opens her presents. She gets a pair of Famous Cities socks. Want.
MA cuts the cake up and they eat it. Stacey eats rice cakes. Dawn makes a big deal of rinsing her mouth out. Dawn, no one was forcing you to eat it.
MA thinks it’s the best birthday ever and it isn’t even her birthday yet.
The next day is her birthday and they’re at a BSC meeting. They line up lots of sitters and a Mr Morgan phones, the BSC having being recommended by Mrs R. No one is free and he has four boys. MA thinks Logan should go but Kristy says he doesn’t want to join the club. MA comes up with the idea for an associate member. Everyone thinks this is awesome so she calls Logan. Kristy is the one who coins the term ‘associate member.’ Logan agrees.
And MA is excited about a boy being in the club.
And thus, we come to the end of the BSC beginning eighth grade for the first time.
.