please don't judge me
I somehow always manage to get myself into situations where I am, inevitably, going to get hurt.
I feel so alone. I feel so stupid...but most of all I just feel tired...
how did this happen? I just want to crawl into bed and sleep forever. you might think I'm being dramatic... but I really am just sick of it all. I don't want to deal with this, I don't even really want to talk to anyone about it because first of all I feel like, what can you even say about it other than I told you so, or that sucks....and second of all I don't want you to judge me when I don't end it... because I don't have the fucking self worth to stop it.
I thought I had learned from past experiences... but really all I am learning is that I suck at life and, basically, in a nut shell I am pathetic. I must have a neon sign on my forehead that says "Use Me... I'll let you"....why don't you just put an end to it you might be thinking?
honestly... I don't fucking know.... I don't fucking know....I really fucking hate myself that much I guess.
I would rather be miserable, than alone? I would rather be pathetic than actually deal with shit?....who the fuck knows.
don't judge me. I'm doing enough of that on my own.
ugh. I'm so lost....I just want to start over...I just want things to work out for once.
I thought about this earlier, but no one has given a shit about me (romatically) in over 3 years...I feel like says something about someone a little bit.
I don't want to feel anything anymore...I would rather be numb.
I feel so alone. I feel so stupid...but most of all I just feel tired...
how did this happen? I just want to crawl into bed and sleep forever. you might think I'm being dramatic... but I really am just sick of it all. I don't want to deal with this, I don't even really want to talk to anyone about it because first of all I feel like, what can you even say about it other than I told you so, or that sucks....and second of all I don't want you to judge me when I don't end it... because I don't have the fucking self worth to stop it.
I thought I had learned from past experiences... but really all I am learning is that I suck at life and, basically, in a nut shell I am pathetic. I must have a neon sign on my forehead that says "Use Me... I'll let you"....why don't you just put an end to it you might be thinking?
honestly... I don't fucking know.... I don't fucking know....I really fucking hate myself that much I guess.
I would rather be miserable, than alone? I would rather be pathetic than actually deal with shit?....who the fuck knows.
don't judge me. I'm doing enough of that on my own.
ugh. I'm so lost....I just want to start over...I just want things to work out for once.
I thought about this earlier, but no one has given a shit about me (romatically) in over 3 years...I feel like says something about someone a little bit.
I don't want to feel anything anymore...I would rather be numb.