Yay!
I made 75 dollars tonight! wayyy more than I thought I would... that means two things 1) I can pay rent YAY!! haha and 2) I can go grocery shopping sooner than I thought YAY!! lol... ohh life..there is a work party tonight, but I dont know if I am gonna go...
I've been feeling so... blah...lately... I dont know how to describe it... I guess "left out" fits best...I feel third wheel-ish... but like the 3rd wheel in life... I dont think that makes sense... but I dont know how else to describe it... like I just tag along with people, and I get invited by default to things...mostly work things I guess like there is this black and white party thing and I didnt get an invite untill like a week after everyone else... and the work parties I dont really get invited to I just hear about them and then people ask if I'm going... I dont know, I'm sure I am overreacting, but lately alehouse has felt like highschool all over again to me and like there are the "cool kids" and then the outcasts...whatever this isnt even worth writing about...
so Jason came into town for a wedding this weekend... he called me on saturday night at 9pm and I didnt call him back untill 10pm and then he didnt answer then never called back... then I get a text tonight(sunday nighht) at 11pm saying "hey sorry but I am driving home with my parents tonight instead of tomorrow, I wanted to hang out, sorry I didnt call I didnt have a service"... like...dont you think if someone REALLY wanted to hang out they would have made plans before coming and wouldnt have waited until 9pm on saturday night to call? and then would have maybe taken their own car and planned on staying an extra day considering monday is memorial day or whatever monday is...plus he's done with school now... and he knows I dont work on mondays... ugh whatever more and more everyday I see how much he sucks...I'm so sick of guys that half ass everything... if you like me than make a fucking effort dammit... whatever I deserve more... I deserve better...the real question is, will I find it?
I smell like resturant... I'm going to go shower...
I've been feeling so... blah...lately... I dont know how to describe it... I guess "left out" fits best...I feel third wheel-ish... but like the 3rd wheel in life... I dont think that makes sense... but I dont know how else to describe it... like I just tag along with people, and I get invited by default to things...mostly work things I guess like there is this black and white party thing and I didnt get an invite untill like a week after everyone else... and the work parties I dont really get invited to I just hear about them and then people ask if I'm going... I dont know, I'm sure I am overreacting, but lately alehouse has felt like highschool all over again to me and like there are the "cool kids" and then the outcasts...whatever this isnt even worth writing about...
so Jason came into town for a wedding this weekend... he called me on saturday night at 9pm and I didnt call him back untill 10pm and then he didnt answer then never called back... then I get a text tonight(sunday nighht) at 11pm saying "hey sorry but I am driving home with my parents tonight instead of tomorrow, I wanted to hang out, sorry I didnt call I didnt have a service"... like...dont you think if someone REALLY wanted to hang out they would have made plans before coming and wouldnt have waited until 9pm on saturday night to call? and then would have maybe taken their own car and planned on staying an extra day considering monday is memorial day or whatever monday is...plus he's done with school now... and he knows I dont work on mondays... ugh whatever more and more everyday I see how much he sucks...I'm so sick of guys that half ass everything... if you like me than make a fucking effort dammit... whatever I deserve more... I deserve better...the real question is, will I find it?
I smell like resturant... I'm going to go shower...