Everything We Had_ChapterTwo {Peterick}
Everything We Had-I've Got All This Ringing In My Ears And None On My Fingers-Chapter Two
That night I was eating dinner alone at my house. Usually Pete comes over, though. The silence was like death. I remember laughing at Pete's crazy adventures, remising at old shenanigans, and talking about music. I poked at the small bowl of soup I had made myself. I originally had a whole turkey for me and Pete, but since he wasn't here I decided not to waste it all. The walls that were once the colour Pete's skin were nothing but blank. The air was cold even though the heat was up to one-hundred. My heat was going to be a fortune, but I couldn't care any less.
I heard Pete laughing. I heard it from across the plain white round table I was sitting at. But the chair was empty. My mind was replaying the sweet, wonderful, sound of Pete. So it was tricking myself. But it was alright. I laughed along with him. "Hey Pete, would you even guess that I once jumped off my roof?" I said, taking a sip of my soup. I heard him say, "No way!! That's crazy, dude. I should've done it with you." "Pete, that wouldn't be safe. You could frickin die!! No way I would've let you." I said, smiling.
Me Pete finished and I washed my dished. I turned around to ask him what he wanted for dessert, and he wasn't there. "What the…" I questioned. It suddenly came back to in a flash. He was gone. I couldn't call him and ask him how he was, like I had done with the previous times. He used to go away on "vacations" to get away from life. But I always called, and he always picked up. I was the only person he'd talk to, and I never asked where he was. He knew I just wanted to make sure that he was okay and that he was safe. And he always was, the worse he's ever been was short a few bucks, so he couldn't buy a jacket or something. But this time I couldn't call.
But it's worth a shot. I'm just playing a game here, so why not. I dialed his cell. It went straight to voicemail, but Pete's voice rang through the speaker, "Patrick. Your name is the only name that is sweet. My love for you is unbearable. I can't believe how much I love you, how much I miss you. Tonight, when I was eating dinner, I heard your laugh. You telling me about how you jumped off a roof. It was so nice. Don't worry-I'm alright. If I'm ever not, I'll say so here. Keep calling this, you'll hear if I'm in trouble or anything here. It will stay the same if I'm alright." the voicemail stopped him. He spoke sort-of fast though, probably to fit all of that in there.
He was in the same conversation as I was with the faux Pete? I couldn't care less about that, but I heard his voice. It was content, a little weary, but I couldn't take all this in. I grabbed a bottle of champagne and took a sip. I wouldn't fall asleep, might as well get drunk and pass out. I knew I shouldn't do this, but I was practically considered insane, so why not add to the pile? I took another sip. It tasted sour. I knew I had to finish it all, at least. Otherwise Pete might have left a few beers in the basement.
Once I finished the bottle, I had a beer and I felt drunk. I was dancing around the house, music playing in my ears. "SHAWTY'S LIKE DA MELODY IN MY HEAD." I sang loudly. I called Pete's cell, and he picked up, saying, "Patrick. Your name is the only name…" and stuff like that. "Heyyyyyyyyyy Pete. You know, you me and sex right now sounds great. I'm drunk so hurry before I pass out." He continued talking. "Whaaaaaaat??" I asked. He babbled on and on. "Eh, just meet me at my house." I hung up and sat down.
I was making out with Pete when my already-closed eyes went even more black. I fell into him and fell asleep. I didn't feel his hand on my head, like what what he does when he sleeps next to me. I never felt this sick before.
I awoke the next morning with a massive headache. "Pete…" I said to him. I looked down next to me. It was a picture of him when he was twenty. "Oh god." I looked at the picture. It had dried spit on it "I made out with a picture of Pete? Oh god. I'll never get hammered with a picture of Pete around again." I groaned. I looked down and saw I didn't have a shirt either. I also tried to have sex with him too. Great. I stood up and fixed myself some coffee. I watched the news, the regular morning routine. Then I decided to call Joe. He might know something.
"Dude, I know crap. The last time I talked to Pete was yesterday's band practice. Andy doesn't know either. Do you know why he ran out, though?" he said. "Joe…he has a wife and a kid. And he said he…loved me. And…we sorta kissed…twice. And he said he would have to leave now because he couldn't love me. There's more depth to it, but that's all that matters." I said softly. He was silent for a moment, then replied. "Okay then. Bye." he hung up. I guess he didn't have his drug of the day yet. I stood for a moment. This way day one of three-hundred and sixty-five. This was going to be some year.
I called Pete's phone at my third cup of coffee. "Good morning sunshine. I'm fine, I just had some pancakes and coffee. Don't go and get drunk yet-that happens in a few months. I love you baby." his voice was the answering machine again. But I already am where I should be (points of insanity-wise) in a few months. I guess I had it bad for Pete, but I just didn't notice it. Because I'm suffering more than any human should. I took a deep breath and called Joe.
"Hey, Joe. I'm going to quit the band. I'm on the verge of insanity, so, yeah." I spoke. "Dude, are you serious?? Oh my god, alright man. Do whatever If you're insane, I have some-" he said. "No, I don't want any drugs or sort. Ask me in a week, though. Why not commit practical suicide?" I said. "Alright. But I'm here for you, man." he answered before hanging up. I looked around my house. I only saw memories of Pete around me.
I decided to get dressed properly before I left for a drive around. It took me almost forty-five minutes, I still had a hangover. I felt like crap, but I really couldn't care less. I took some pain medication and got my keys. The car in my driveway seemed all to far. I wanted to just fall into a coma and find Pete. And tell him everything would be alright. I picked up a small stone. It felt like I was holding a cup of Starbucks. I groaned and threw it on the ground.
I drove around town, not really sure of where I was going. I finally arrived at my old elementary school where Pete and I had first met. I instantly remembered that day, trigging a memory rewind.
"Okay class, it's time for recess!! Today we will be joining Ms. William's class. Be sure to treat the other kids the way you want to be treated." our teacher, Mrs. Lenka, said. It was first grade and we had just finished math. The playground was directly outside the window, so we just walked out the door. I ran to the swings, where I always went. I sat on one and saw another boy on the other swing. I was surprised, since I was the only one to be one these. I always felt special.
"Hey, I thought I was the only one who liked the swings. It's nice to know that someone else does." I said, my voice seemingly high. "Mhmm," the boy mumbled, looking down. "I guess we're the only two." he looked up. He had deep brown eyes and a curious expression. His short brown hair was a lot like the other boys' hair. He looked me in the eyes for a moment, then smiled. "Mother says when you feel goosebumps you really like someone. She says they get to be your bestest friend, even more." he stood. I grinned. "My momma says that too. Except then she says that you have to promise it and get a special ring you'll wear forever." I stood too. "I don't know why, but I want you to be that person. I don't even know your name, what is it?" he asked. "Patrick…Patrick Martin Stump." I said. "I'd love to be that person." The boy grinned. "I'm Peter, but you can call me Pete."
"And mommy always says that they prove everyday that they are bestest friends by touching each other's lips with their own. I think we should do that too." he told me. I really liked this guy. And he was smart, that was cool. I wouldn't mind doing all this bestest friend ceremony stuff with him. "Sure. I do want to be your best friend forever." I knew how to do this. Mommy and her bestest friend, Daddy, had always done this. "Okay, I'm starting." Pete said.
We touched each other's lips for ten seconds around. I felt like magic. Pete was about to grab my hair until a teacher came over to us. She pulled us apart and yelled, "PRINCIPALS! NOW!" and grabbed both our hands. We were dragged away from recess. I didn't even know what we had done wrong.
"Mr. Gilligan, I caught these two…kissing. Around the swings. I know this is the last thing you'd expect from either of these two, but it happened." Ms. Williams said. "I don't understand you too. Why were you kissing?" the principal asked. "Oh so that's what it's called. Mommy told me it's the way bestest friends promise each other everyday that they are bestest friends. I wanted to do the same with Patrick." Pete looked up with bright eyes. "You know, he gave me goosebumps when he first spoke. His eyes are real pretty, I wanna colour them in a coloring book. They'd be the colour of a chocolate bar melted into that sauce you get on ice cream. Plus I feel as if he is something magical, even more than my stuffed panda. You can't tell me that we can't be bestest friends everyday." he finished.
He looked at me and smiled. "In fact, I want to be his bestest friend so badly, I'll take whatever punishment you give him for him." I gasped. He was so nice. I had to speak up, too. But I couldn't because Mr. Gilligan spoke. "Pete, what you are feeling is not okay. I don't know if Patrick feels this, but you can't be near him. What you did at recess is wrong, and your parents are wrong. You will learn more as you grow up, but that is not okay."
I kicked and screamed. I had a liking for this guy, he was supposed to be my bestest friend. I told my mommy and she nodded her head no. Then she told daddy, who seemed worried. I heard them say, "I can't believe we found out he was gay or bi at such a young age." At the time, I didn't know what that meant. So one day I looked up gay on Google. "To be in love with the same gender." I knew what gender was, and I sort-of knew what love was. So we were constantly together at the playground, doing everything mommy and daddy did.
We grew up, so we began forgetting the kissing and holding hands. But we were bestest friends. It was the years previously when we were when we didn't know was called, "dating".
I smiled at the flashback. It was bittersweet. But that kiss sure was sweet.
That night I was eating dinner alone at my house. Usually Pete comes over, though. The silence was like death. I remember laughing at Pete's crazy adventures, remising at old shenanigans, and talking about music. I poked at the small bowl of soup I had made myself. I originally had a whole turkey for me and Pete, but since he wasn't here I decided not to waste it all. The walls that were once the colour Pete's skin were nothing but blank. The air was cold even though the heat was up to one-hundred. My heat was going to be a fortune, but I couldn't care any less.
I heard Pete laughing. I heard it from across the plain white round table I was sitting at. But the chair was empty. My mind was replaying the sweet, wonderful, sound of Pete. So it was tricking myself. But it was alright. I laughed along with him. "Hey Pete, would you even guess that I once jumped off my roof?" I said, taking a sip of my soup. I heard him say, "No way!! That's crazy, dude. I should've done it with you." "Pete, that wouldn't be safe. You could frickin die!! No way I would've let you." I said, smiling.
Me Pete finished and I washed my dished. I turned around to ask him what he wanted for dessert, and he wasn't there. "What the…" I questioned. It suddenly came back to in a flash. He was gone. I couldn't call him and ask him how he was, like I had done with the previous times. He used to go away on "vacations" to get away from life. But I always called, and he always picked up. I was the only person he'd talk to, and I never asked where he was. He knew I just wanted to make sure that he was okay and that he was safe. And he always was, the worse he's ever been was short a few bucks, so he couldn't buy a jacket or something. But this time I couldn't call.
But it's worth a shot. I'm just playing a game here, so why not. I dialed his cell. It went straight to voicemail, but Pete's voice rang through the speaker, "Patrick. Your name is the only name that is sweet. My love for you is unbearable. I can't believe how much I love you, how much I miss you. Tonight, when I was eating dinner, I heard your laugh. You telling me about how you jumped off a roof. It was so nice. Don't worry-I'm alright. If I'm ever not, I'll say so here. Keep calling this, you'll hear if I'm in trouble or anything here. It will stay the same if I'm alright." the voicemail stopped him. He spoke sort-of fast though, probably to fit all of that in there.
He was in the same conversation as I was with the faux Pete? I couldn't care less about that, but I heard his voice. It was content, a little weary, but I couldn't take all this in. I grabbed a bottle of champagne and took a sip. I wouldn't fall asleep, might as well get drunk and pass out. I knew I shouldn't do this, but I was practically considered insane, so why not add to the pile? I took another sip. It tasted sour. I knew I had to finish it all, at least. Otherwise Pete might have left a few beers in the basement.
Once I finished the bottle, I had a beer and I felt drunk. I was dancing around the house, music playing in my ears. "SHAWTY'S LIKE DA MELODY IN MY HEAD." I sang loudly. I called Pete's cell, and he picked up, saying, "Patrick. Your name is the only name…" and stuff like that. "Heyyyyyyyyyy Pete. You know, you me and sex right now sounds great. I'm drunk so hurry before I pass out." He continued talking. "Whaaaaaaat??" I asked. He babbled on and on. "Eh, just meet me at my house." I hung up and sat down.
I was making out with Pete when my already-closed eyes went even more black. I fell into him and fell asleep. I didn't feel his hand on my head, like what what he does when he sleeps next to me. I never felt this sick before.
I awoke the next morning with a massive headache. "Pete…" I said to him. I looked down next to me. It was a picture of him when he was twenty. "Oh god." I looked at the picture. It had dried spit on it "I made out with a picture of Pete? Oh god. I'll never get hammered with a picture of Pete around again." I groaned. I looked down and saw I didn't have a shirt either. I also tried to have sex with him too. Great. I stood up and fixed myself some coffee. I watched the news, the regular morning routine. Then I decided to call Joe. He might know something.
"Dude, I know crap. The last time I talked to Pete was yesterday's band practice. Andy doesn't know either. Do you know why he ran out, though?" he said. "Joe…he has a wife and a kid. And he said he…loved me. And…we sorta kissed…twice. And he said he would have to leave now because he couldn't love me. There's more depth to it, but that's all that matters." I said softly. He was silent for a moment, then replied. "Okay then. Bye." he hung up. I guess he didn't have his drug of the day yet. I stood for a moment. This way day one of three-hundred and sixty-five. This was going to be some year.
I called Pete's phone at my third cup of coffee. "Good morning sunshine. I'm fine, I just had some pancakes and coffee. Don't go and get drunk yet-that happens in a few months. I love you baby." his voice was the answering machine again. But I already am where I should be (points of insanity-wise) in a few months. I guess I had it bad for Pete, but I just didn't notice it. Because I'm suffering more than any human should. I took a deep breath and called Joe.
"Hey, Joe. I'm going to quit the band. I'm on the verge of insanity, so, yeah." I spoke. "Dude, are you serious?? Oh my god, alright man. Do whatever If you're insane, I have some-" he said. "No, I don't want any drugs or sort. Ask me in a week, though. Why not commit practical suicide?" I said. "Alright. But I'm here for you, man." he answered before hanging up. I looked around my house. I only saw memories of Pete around me.
I decided to get dressed properly before I left for a drive around. It took me almost forty-five minutes, I still had a hangover. I felt like crap, but I really couldn't care less. I took some pain medication and got my keys. The car in my driveway seemed all to far. I wanted to just fall into a coma and find Pete. And tell him everything would be alright. I picked up a small stone. It felt like I was holding a cup of Starbucks. I groaned and threw it on the ground.
I drove around town, not really sure of where I was going. I finally arrived at my old elementary school where Pete and I had first met. I instantly remembered that day, trigging a memory rewind.
"Okay class, it's time for recess!! Today we will be joining Ms. William's class. Be sure to treat the other kids the way you want to be treated." our teacher, Mrs. Lenka, said. It was first grade and we had just finished math. The playground was directly outside the window, so we just walked out the door. I ran to the swings, where I always went. I sat on one and saw another boy on the other swing. I was surprised, since I was the only one to be one these. I always felt special.
"Hey, I thought I was the only one who liked the swings. It's nice to know that someone else does." I said, my voice seemingly high. "Mhmm," the boy mumbled, looking down. "I guess we're the only two." he looked up. He had deep brown eyes and a curious expression. His short brown hair was a lot like the other boys' hair. He looked me in the eyes for a moment, then smiled. "Mother says when you feel goosebumps you really like someone. She says they get to be your bestest friend, even more." he stood. I grinned. "My momma says that too. Except then she says that you have to promise it and get a special ring you'll wear forever." I stood too. "I don't know why, but I want you to be that person. I don't even know your name, what is it?" he asked. "Patrick…Patrick Martin Stump." I said. "I'd love to be that person." The boy grinned. "I'm Peter, but you can call me Pete."
"And mommy always says that they prove everyday that they are bestest friends by touching each other's lips with their own. I think we should do that too." he told me. I really liked this guy. And he was smart, that was cool. I wouldn't mind doing all this bestest friend ceremony stuff with him. "Sure. I do want to be your best friend forever." I knew how to do this. Mommy and her bestest friend, Daddy, had always done this. "Okay, I'm starting." Pete said.
We touched each other's lips for ten seconds around. I felt like magic. Pete was about to grab my hair until a teacher came over to us. She pulled us apart and yelled, "PRINCIPALS! NOW!" and grabbed both our hands. We were dragged away from recess. I didn't even know what we had done wrong.
"Mr. Gilligan, I caught these two…kissing. Around the swings. I know this is the last thing you'd expect from either of these two, but it happened." Ms. Williams said. "I don't understand you too. Why were you kissing?" the principal asked. "Oh so that's what it's called. Mommy told me it's the way bestest friends promise each other everyday that they are bestest friends. I wanted to do the same with Patrick." Pete looked up with bright eyes. "You know, he gave me goosebumps when he first spoke. His eyes are real pretty, I wanna colour them in a coloring book. They'd be the colour of a chocolate bar melted into that sauce you get on ice cream. Plus I feel as if he is something magical, even more than my stuffed panda. You can't tell me that we can't be bestest friends everyday." he finished.
He looked at me and smiled. "In fact, I want to be his bestest friend so badly, I'll take whatever punishment you give him for him." I gasped. He was so nice. I had to speak up, too. But I couldn't because Mr. Gilligan spoke. "Pete, what you are feeling is not okay. I don't know if Patrick feels this, but you can't be near him. What you did at recess is wrong, and your parents are wrong. You will learn more as you grow up, but that is not okay."
I kicked and screamed. I had a liking for this guy, he was supposed to be my bestest friend. I told my mommy and she nodded her head no. Then she told daddy, who seemed worried. I heard them say, "I can't believe we found out he was gay or bi at such a young age." At the time, I didn't know what that meant. So one day I looked up gay on Google. "To be in love with the same gender." I knew what gender was, and I sort-of knew what love was. So we were constantly together at the playground, doing everything mommy and daddy did.
We grew up, so we began forgetting the kissing and holding hands. But we were bestest friends. It was the years previously when we were when we didn't know was called, "dating".
I smiled at the flashback. It was bittersweet. But that kiss sure was sweet.