(no subject)
can it be weekends all the time? the school week is so stressful. i essentially go from 8-6 on mondays and fridays, 9(AM)-10(PM) on tuesdays, 8AM to 9PM wednesdays, 8-7 on thursdays. random hour breaks here and there, but no time for RELAXING! i had a paper due, and 3 midterms this week. a midterm last week. on the bright side, i'm doing decently in my classes, i haven't really gotten any bad grades yet, but i'm always stressed out. i'm nervous i'm going to crack a note in band, i'm a spectacle there. they all are watching for me to mess up, i know it. i was asked to play in the top band for the next concert, just one song, but still, the top band. my professor put a list of 4 possible people to fill that spot. i let a senior take it, it technically should have been mine, but rather than being aggressive, i let her get it. it's her last semester here, and i'm pretty sure she would have wrung my neck off if i took it. it's an honor to be given that opportunity, but i want to have something to look forward to in my years here.
i'm happy because i am at least learning how to control myself better on weekends... if you're catching my drift? i could have easily hooked up with someone this weekend, and it's very possible we will next weekend, but i stopped myself. i keep putting myself in these situations and i feel like crap the next day. it's not like me for just randomly hooking up with someone, so i'm glad i have identified where i can start making myself feel better with things like that. i was proud of my weekend at least.
i'm going to go practice, because i don't want to fail my lesson tomorrow. yikes.
i'm happy because i am at least learning how to control myself better on weekends... if you're catching my drift? i could have easily hooked up with someone this weekend, and it's very possible we will next weekend, but i stopped myself. i keep putting myself in these situations and i feel like crap the next day. it's not like me for just randomly hooking up with someone, so i'm glad i have identified where i can start making myself feel better with things like that. i was proud of my weekend at least.
i'm going to go practice, because i don't want to fail my lesson tomorrow. yikes.