Larry Wilmore Prompt Responses
for tellmeaboutit (and technically ths_just_in)
--
Back when he felt indestructible, Larry wanted to get drunk to the point that he passed out and woke up with a massive hangover. Mostly because he figured it would be better than trying every drug there was to try, but partially because he didn't think it could happen.
It's this desire to get completely, well, shitfaced, that leads him to a friend of a friend's apartment for a party with a plethora of kegs (and plethora is a word that Larry probably won't remember he used later), and a decent amount of floor space to properly pass out on later.
After drink seven (or eight... maybe ten?), Larry's fairly sure that he should probably stop (something about alcohol poisoning?), but he promised himself that he was going to drink until he passed out, so he continues filling his red plastic cup until it falls next to him (half full) on the carpet.
In the morning, his mouth is full of fuzz, and the bathroom just isn't close enough and he swears to every deity he can think of that he's never drinking that much again.
-----
Larry wished the maintenance guy would hurry up. After all, how long did it take to hookup one pretty little colored wire to a little colored spigot? Apparently, it took a very long time, if the fact that there was still no hot water in his apartment was any indication.
He sighed, shuffled some papers around on his desk, re-wrote a segment, edited it again and finally decided that he couldn't wait for the maintenance guy any longer. So, he went out for lunch.
When he came back, the "Sorry we missed you!" notice on the door was
-----
One thing Larry's got
to remember is to pay
all of his taxes.
Because he wouldn't
mind taking a future ob
in the next Cabinent
(and Presidential
Jester hasn't been around
since Truman was boss
and then Nixon tapped
away the Secretary
of Humor). So now...
Larry just has to
give up most of his money
to the IRS.
-----
The first time Larry won a plastic frog, he was ten and it was at a school fair. He had thrown his makeshift fishing pole (complete with clothespin at the end) over the sheet strung between the trees, hoping for candy (because he was hungry and sugar tastes good at ten), but instead pulled back a little, pink plastic jumping frog.
It jumped itself into the pond.
--
The second time Larry won a plastic frog, he was at the county fair in middle school. He had been trying to beat the skeeball high score and kept just missing the 100 point hole. The measly 80 points he racked up gave him enough tickets to get a green jumping frog.
It went on his bookshelf and got lost when he moved.
--
The third time Larry won a plastic frog, he was in high school and was trying to impress his girlfriend at the time. They were on the senior trip to a theme park, and he was in the arcade attempting to get enough tickets for the giant bear. When every attempt ended in failure, he gave her the ten tickets, and she came back with a red toy frog.
She kept it when they broke up.
--
The fourth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was taking a break from his shift at the local fun zone during the summer between high school and college. He was bored, and there wasn't much around to do (plus, he wasn't one for go karts with the customers). So, he played the fifty cent crane game, won some smarties (which he ate) and a green toy frog (which he shoved in his pocket).
It fell out when he was doing laundry and got kicked under the washer.
--
The fifth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was in college and some of his friends dragged him to the local arcade. The skeeball machine was taunting him (again), and he tried to beat that high score. This time, when he came so close to matching it, he had enough tickets to buy the paddle ball. But when he saw the frogs all crammed into the plastic container, he couldn't resist getting one (and so what if the skittles he got with the rest of the ticket weren't worth it?).
He put it on top of his dresser, knocked it off one drunken night and forgot about it in the morning (and didn't find it when he moved out).
--
The sixth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was attempting to relive his childhood by going back to the same fun zone he worked at that one summer. When he spotted the crane game (jammed in the back corner and forgotten for the shooting games and Dance Dance Revolution), he decided to try his hand at it again (it was the cheapest thing there, after all). This time, he won two laffy taffy's and another plastic frog. He gave the candy to the first kid that wandered by, and went home and put the frog in his medicine cabinet.
This morning, when he left for work, the frog sat and stared at him.
--
Back when he felt indestructible, Larry wanted to get drunk to the point that he passed out and woke up with a massive hangover. Mostly because he figured it would be better than trying every drug there was to try, but partially because he didn't think it could happen.
It's this desire to get completely, well, shitfaced, that leads him to a friend of a friend's apartment for a party with a plethora of kegs (and plethora is a word that Larry probably won't remember he used later), and a decent amount of floor space to properly pass out on later.
After drink seven (or eight... maybe ten?), Larry's fairly sure that he should probably stop (something about alcohol poisoning?), but he promised himself that he was going to drink until he passed out, so he continues filling his red plastic cup until it falls next to him (half full) on the carpet.
In the morning, his mouth is full of fuzz, and the bathroom just isn't close enough and he swears to every deity he can think of that he's never drinking that much again.
-----
Larry wished the maintenance guy would hurry up. After all, how long did it take to hookup one pretty little colored wire to a little colored spigot? Apparently, it took a very long time, if the fact that there was still no hot water in his apartment was any indication.
He sighed, shuffled some papers around on his desk, re-wrote a segment, edited it again and finally decided that he couldn't wait for the maintenance guy any longer. So, he went out for lunch.
When he came back, the "Sorry we missed you!" notice on the door was
-----
One thing Larry's got
to remember is to pay
all of his taxes.
Because he wouldn't
mind taking a future ob
in the next Cabinent
(and Presidential
Jester hasn't been around
since Truman was boss
and then Nixon tapped
away the Secretary
of Humor). So now...
Larry just has to
give up most of his money
to the IRS.
-----
The first time Larry won a plastic frog, he was ten and it was at a school fair. He had thrown his makeshift fishing pole (complete with clothespin at the end) over the sheet strung between the trees, hoping for candy (because he was hungry and sugar tastes good at ten), but instead pulled back a little, pink plastic jumping frog.
It jumped itself into the pond.
--
The second time Larry won a plastic frog, he was at the county fair in middle school. He had been trying to beat the skeeball high score and kept just missing the 100 point hole. The measly 80 points he racked up gave him enough tickets to get a green jumping frog.
It went on his bookshelf and got lost when he moved.
--
The third time Larry won a plastic frog, he was in high school and was trying to impress his girlfriend at the time. They were on the senior trip to a theme park, and he was in the arcade attempting to get enough tickets for the giant bear. When every attempt ended in failure, he gave her the ten tickets, and she came back with a red toy frog.
She kept it when they broke up.
--
The fourth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was taking a break from his shift at the local fun zone during the summer between high school and college. He was bored, and there wasn't much around to do (plus, he wasn't one for go karts with the customers). So, he played the fifty cent crane game, won some smarties (which he ate) and a green toy frog (which he shoved in his pocket).
It fell out when he was doing laundry and got kicked under the washer.
--
The fifth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was in college and some of his friends dragged him to the local arcade. The skeeball machine was taunting him (again), and he tried to beat that high score. This time, when he came so close to matching it, he had enough tickets to buy the paddle ball. But when he saw the frogs all crammed into the plastic container, he couldn't resist getting one (and so what if the skittles he got with the rest of the ticket weren't worth it?).
He put it on top of his dresser, knocked it off one drunken night and forgot about it in the morning (and didn't find it when he moved out).
--
The sixth time Larry won a plastic frog, he was attempting to relive his childhood by going back to the same fun zone he worked at that one summer. When he spotted the crane game (jammed in the back corner and forgotten for the shooting games and Dance Dance Revolution), he decided to try his hand at it again (it was the cheapest thing there, after all). This time, he won two laffy taffy's and another plastic frog. He gave the candy to the first kid that wandered by, and went home and put the frog in his medicine cabinet.
This morning, when he left for work, the frog sat and stared at him.