some of these are post-dated, but mostly worth it...
July 4
A day to show love for your country of choice. So Ashley and I go to work in full green. I joke “Ay, long live the Irish!”
And, to celebrate, we decide that we will tonight, accomplish the impossible, the unheard of…and we succeeded!
We got Kevin SMASHED!
Keep in mind, order of most to least fucked up is as follows: Kevin, Ashley, Nessa
And now, the ramblings of the drunken threesome:
Nessa: ahh, three angry drunken lesbians. (takes a quick look at Kevin) arg, you’ll never be a real lesbian! You’ll always only be half a lesbian!
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: aww, but I wanna be a real lesbian!
Ashley: you know what real lesbians do? They give their girlfriends $50!
Nessa: Ashley, that’s terrible!!!
Ashley: (Laughs) I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: I don’t have any cash on me right now…
Ashley: Credit cards and checks work good too…don’t you want to be a good lesbian?
Nessa: Ashley, that’s so wrong!
Ashley: what are Oompa Loompa’s made of?
Kevin: green and orange!
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: I’ll drink to that too!
Nessa: I don’t really know…Snozberries?
Kevin: I’ll drink to that!
Ashley: what are Snozberries?
Kevin: I think they’re a member of the Dingleberry family.
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Nessa: so will I!
Kevin: me too!
And so, it went on into the night, until Ashley passed out on her bed and, after getting Kevin drunk for the first time in his life off of three Bacardi O 3 Silvers, a little Smirnoff Ice, and about two-three shots of Bacardi Razz, he pukes in my landlord’s backyard.
It was a very amusing night, right up until he threw up. I wonder what they’ll say when they see it in the morning?
I was also very much amused by Ashley. Apparently, according to Ashley, nearly everything that was said last night was worth drinking to.
July 5
Next morning…we are all hang over free, no one has spotted the giant puddle of vomit in the backyard, and I learn from my roommate Fredrick that my landlord/lady STILL don’t know Kevin’s been spending the night. Not surprising, as since Ashley and I have moved in, we have not seen them, with the exception of when Dad went and bought us a bunch of new furniture, and was parked in their space while he helped us get in it. A notable thirty seconds while Dad moved his truck for Mr. Steve. Wow. In four days, the only sign of life from the five other people living here, with the exception of Ashley and myself, has been Derick, and of course Kevin, Ashley’s boyfriend Steve (once briefly, I saw him about ten minuets worth) and Ashley’s younger sister Ericka, who is a sister to me, as well. I don’t count the last three, as they don’t live here, but we might almost as well count Kevin, the only times he hasn’t been here were work related.
Haha but last night was so funny!!! I stood there and held Kevin’s hair back and kept wondering what the owners would say? Probably ask if Kevin should attend AA meetings. As this was his first time drinking past tipsy, I severely doubt it. But I had this image of Mrs. Gina doing her laundry at two in the morning and sees some strange guy in his mid-twenties puking next to her patio. Oh god you had to be there. (sidenote to Kevin: honey I’m so sorry for being amused at your insides being on my lawn but remember I had a few drinks myself and I’m sure a mushroom cloud in the distance would have been equally as amusing at that point.)
I miss Jessica. She needs to come see the awesomeness of my basement. She is getting an almost exclusive offer. Only her and Chris are going to be invited to come see where Ashley and I live, from my side. I don’t think she wants too many people to know where we live either. I know I’m probably going to drag Jeremy over here at some point as well. But out of my old daily crew, that’s about it. Maybe James, one day. Kevin and Frankie need to be kidnapped as well…once I have the T.V. and Playstation 2 hooked up. Mmm…DDR. Yummy!
Now, however, I should get dressed and go…Ashley got her rabbit…and I am gonna go pick up my fuzzies.
current day...
got my fuzzies!!! yay!!! they're so tiny, and their eyes aren't even opened yet...kevin and i feed them from an eye dropper...
I got ANOTHER raise!!! YAY!!!
A day to show love for your country of choice. So Ashley and I go to work in full green. I joke “Ay, long live the Irish!”
And, to celebrate, we decide that we will tonight, accomplish the impossible, the unheard of…and we succeeded!
We got Kevin SMASHED!
Keep in mind, order of most to least fucked up is as follows: Kevin, Ashley, Nessa
And now, the ramblings of the drunken threesome:
Nessa: ahh, three angry drunken lesbians. (takes a quick look at Kevin) arg, you’ll never be a real lesbian! You’ll always only be half a lesbian!
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: aww, but I wanna be a real lesbian!
Ashley: you know what real lesbians do? They give their girlfriends $50!
Nessa: Ashley, that’s terrible!!!
Ashley: (Laughs) I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: I don’t have any cash on me right now…
Ashley: Credit cards and checks work good too…don’t you want to be a good lesbian?
Nessa: Ashley, that’s so wrong!
Ashley: what are Oompa Loompa’s made of?
Kevin: green and orange!
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Kevin: I’ll drink to that too!
Nessa: I don’t really know…Snozberries?
Kevin: I’ll drink to that!
Ashley: what are Snozberries?
Kevin: I think they’re a member of the Dingleberry family.
Ashley: I’ll drink to that!
Nessa: so will I!
Kevin: me too!
And so, it went on into the night, until Ashley passed out on her bed and, after getting Kevin drunk for the first time in his life off of three Bacardi O 3 Silvers, a little Smirnoff Ice, and about two-three shots of Bacardi Razz, he pukes in my landlord’s backyard.
It was a very amusing night, right up until he threw up. I wonder what they’ll say when they see it in the morning?
I was also very much amused by Ashley. Apparently, according to Ashley, nearly everything that was said last night was worth drinking to.
July 5
Next morning…we are all hang over free, no one has spotted the giant puddle of vomit in the backyard, and I learn from my roommate Fredrick that my landlord/lady STILL don’t know Kevin’s been spending the night. Not surprising, as since Ashley and I have moved in, we have not seen them, with the exception of when Dad went and bought us a bunch of new furniture, and was parked in their space while he helped us get in it. A notable thirty seconds while Dad moved his truck for Mr. Steve. Wow. In four days, the only sign of life from the five other people living here, with the exception of Ashley and myself, has been Derick, and of course Kevin, Ashley’s boyfriend Steve (once briefly, I saw him about ten minuets worth) and Ashley’s younger sister Ericka, who is a sister to me, as well. I don’t count the last three, as they don’t live here, but we might almost as well count Kevin, the only times he hasn’t been here were work related.
Haha but last night was so funny!!! I stood there and held Kevin’s hair back and kept wondering what the owners would say? Probably ask if Kevin should attend AA meetings. As this was his first time drinking past tipsy, I severely doubt it. But I had this image of Mrs. Gina doing her laundry at two in the morning and sees some strange guy in his mid-twenties puking next to her patio. Oh god you had to be there. (sidenote to Kevin: honey I’m so sorry for being amused at your insides being on my lawn but remember I had a few drinks myself and I’m sure a mushroom cloud in the distance would have been equally as amusing at that point.)
I miss Jessica. She needs to come see the awesomeness of my basement. She is getting an almost exclusive offer. Only her and Chris are going to be invited to come see where Ashley and I live, from my side. I don’t think she wants too many people to know where we live either. I know I’m probably going to drag Jeremy over here at some point as well. But out of my old daily crew, that’s about it. Maybe James, one day. Kevin and Frankie need to be kidnapped as well…once I have the T.V. and Playstation 2 hooked up. Mmm…DDR. Yummy!
Now, however, I should get dressed and go…Ashley got her rabbit…and I am gonna go pick up my fuzzies.
current day...
got my fuzzies!!! yay!!! they're so tiny, and their eyes aren't even opened yet...kevin and i feed them from an eye dropper...
I got ANOTHER raise!!! YAY!!!