um, this is really long, and prob boring to you...........
well, I can't believe that I'm going back to Virginia in less than a week (well, NC actually- then VA)and I'm about to go crazy here... I want (and need) to give Tony his hat back since I'm leavin in a week & I like hangin out w/him... but for like the second time EVER I'm actually afraid to ask someone to do something... it's extremely odd..anyway, I just talked to Kurtis too... woooow, was that ODD! Hm, don't you hate people u have a history with? Anyway, Chrissy... I swear, every little thing she's done lately has pissed me off extremely, and Jen, I've been okay w/her for a while now I guess. It's been prolly a month or so since we've actually fought for real. And my mom.. I was talking to her yesterday and I like bursted into tears and she couldn't figure out why, but I didn't want to tell her that it was because it was b/c of things she said, so I just had this breakdown and i couldn't really get out what I wanted to say, and it was just horrible. And she told me that we most likely wouldn't move down here and that I had many school choices like a program I could get into at any of the high schools in the area or I could go to the Episcopal school by her work.. I think that would be my favorite choice if I had to, but what she doesn't realize is that it's not just the school here that I like, it's the classes, the school, the environment is just so much more genuine, and the people... I have so many more and better friends here... It's like I've started a whole new life that I like sooo much better, I like whoI am now better-I feel better about myself, and I don't want to have to start ALL OVER AGAIN at another school for my goddamn junior year.. I am the type of person who will just walk up and start talkin to people, introducing myself, etc. but it's just not something I feel like doing five million more times. And no matter where I go I'm gonna have to go through that trouble again.. If I go back to Forest Park, most likely I won't get along w/my old friends b/c half of them moved last year, and I've practically become a completely different person, and we probably wouldn't get along. So, basically, I'm fucked. But, on the other hand I'll get away from people like Colin, Hector , etc. that I talked o at one point but no longer do.. but that's about the only plus. whew... that was tiring... but I am excited because on June 5, Justin is havin his B'day party in Virginia Beach so we'll prolly have to come back from Northern VA where my mom lives since that's where they're havin the bbq for Kylie and drive down there after already bein in NC/VA Beach for memorial Day weekend+ more. Oh, AAANNNDDD, Nick said he wanted me to come over this week sometime and we could hang out an dchill in the hot tub... but I'm not sure if he was serious or not.. hmm...? Oh well.. I'm gonna go now after I got all that out (there's more but I won't bore you)... and thanks for readin all this if you actually did lol...
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