Fic: The Day After Tomorrow - pt. 11 [Eli Stone]
Chapter 11
The next couple of days passed in a blur. There were endless phone calls and tearful friends of Jessica's who stopped by her apartment unannounced. It was difficult to keep Liam's routine with all the visitors but Matt and Rosa did their best. Before the funeral they packed up a few bags of his clothes and toys and, along with his bedroom furniture, moved them back to Matt's place. That at least took care of most of the visitors. They hadn't bothered to find out where he lived from Jessica and Matt was smart enough not to be listed.
His parents arrived and took up residence in his other spare room. He was grateful for their presence, for the indulgent mothering way his mom lavished attention on Liam, and for the quiet, stoic way his dad comforted him over his loss.
Jessica had been adamant about not having a stuffy funeral where people read poems and sang hymns. Instead a gathering was planned at Jessica's favorite bistro hang out and her remains would be cremated without ceremony.
He didn't want to take Liam to the wake, so instead his parents took the boy out for the afternoon. Matt dressed slowly in his suit and a blue tie that Jessica had given him, dreading facing all her friends, many of whom still resented the fact that he had been named Liam's guardian.
When he arrived at the bistro he saw the sign reading 'Closed for private function' and wanted to run in the other direction. But he took a deep breath and pushed through the door. He recognized few of the people inside. Those he did barely acknowledged him. Only Eva made a beeline for him and gave him a teary hug.
"You didn't bring him?" she asked.
"No."
Eva seemed to understand and said no more. She disappeared to get him a glass of wine, leaving him standing alone once more. Matt wondered what he was doing there, when he knew Jessica didn't care about such rituals. He wished he'd gone to the beach with his parents and Liam instead. Then he saw Taylor.
She walked towards him, smiling decorously when his face registered surprise. He had called her only once since Jessica died, just to let her know. He hadn't told her about the wake or where it was being held, figuring he might as well spare her.
Taylor kissed his cheek and drew him into a hug. He held on tight for several long moments, unprepared for how much he had missed her. She was exactly the same - the way she looked, the way she smelled, the way she fit in his arms. He couldn't believe she was the same when everything else in his life had been turned upside down.
Taylor stood back and smiled again as she brushed her hands down his suit lapels.
"I called the apartment and spoke to your mom," she explained before he asked what she was doing there. "We wanted to be here for you."
Matt looked up to see that his assistant, Lauren, was there behind Taylor, along with Eli and Maggie. His chest swelled with gratitude.
"Thanks for coming," he told them, then his gaze fell back on Taylor. He reached out to take her hand and held it firmly in his.
The five of them spent the next hour together. Jessica's friends had little interaction with him. Sally made a speech and showed a slideshow of photographs of Jessica. They were taken during the last few years, all judiciously edited so Donna didn't appear in any of them. Matt thought it a shame that they hadn't asked him for any photos of Jessica in her earlier years, but then he realized Sally probably didn't care much for pictures of the two of them together when they dated at college.
They didn't ask him to speak and, though he was the closest thing Jessica had to family, Matt was relieved. He had no idea what he would say if they had. How do you sum up a life that was only half lived? How do you make sense of a new mother being denied seeing her son grow to adulthood? Not making a speech meant he could escape as soon as he was able to slip out unnoticed by Sally. Before he could do so Eva cornered him for his address so they could come and visit Liam.
Matt loosened his tie as soon as he stepped outside the bistro, thankful it was over. Lauren assured him that everything was alright back at the office and that Keith Bennett and a couple of the other associates were looking after his cases. She excused herself to return to WPK, leaving Taylor, Eli and Maggie.
"Do you need a hand with anything?" Eli asked after a nudge from Maggie. "Packing up… moving, that sort of thing?"
"I'm set. Thank you, though. And thanks for coming. You didn't have to." He shook Eli's hand. Matt was sincere in his gratitude. Eli had once, when they first started at WPK, been the closest thing he had to a friend at the firm. It was only in later years that competitiveness made them rivals.
"We're here if you need us," Maggie said before pecking him swiftly on the cheek. She and Eli bid their goodbyes too, then caught up with Lauren who was waiting for a cab.
Taylor stood a few feet away, watching him carefully. Matt felt compelled to lighten the mood.
"Well, aren't they just a darling couple?" he said, tossing a glance towards Maggie and Eli.
"Adorable," she agreed grimly, not breaking her gaze. He could see the worry in her eyes but he wasn't ready to open up to her about what he was feeling. He barely knew himself.
"Do you have to get back to the office too?" he asked.
"No, I'm taking the afternoon off."
"Playing hooky? Daddy won't be pleased if he finds out."
She ignored his tone. "He knows where I am."
"Really?" Matt's eyebrows raised in surprise. "I thought I was an undesirable commodity when it came to his princess."
Taylor rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest.
"I thought you might like some company," she tried again.
"I don't think I'm very good company at the present time."
"I don't care. I'm here."
He sighed, deciding whether or not to burden her with everything that was going on in his life. She hadn't signed up for a relationship, let alone a kid. He didn't expect her to stick around, nor did he know how to handle it if she did. For now, he would just be thankful for the fact that she was there.
"Did you bring your car?" he asked.
"Yes."
"I have to go pick up Jessica's ashes."
"Okay," Taylor replied only a little hesitantly. "I'll drive."
"Thanks."
They walked the block to her car in silence. But as they did Taylor slipped her hand into his once more.
0 0 0 0
Matt led the way through his front door, holding it open with his elbow for Taylor. His keys landed in their usual spot and he nudged on the lights. He didn't know what to do with the plain wooden box in his hands. Matt had asked Jessica about it once, tried to find out if she wanted her ashes scattered someplace she loved, or buried in a garden. But she never had a chance to tell him. Matt thought they had more time. Now he was stuck with a box. For now he found a spot on his bookshelf well out of reach of a toddler's hands.
Taylor was casting her eyes around his living room, taking in Liam's toys which were scattered on the floor, when he returned from the kitchen.
"No coffee, sorry. We'll have to settle for beer." He handed her a bottle and fell onto the couch with his own. As he sank into the leather he sighed tiredly.
Taylor perched on an armchair, not interested in the beer. "How's Liam settling in?"
Matt took a long drink, more as a delay tactic. He was too caught up in his own thoughts to want to have a conversation. But he knew if he didn't talk she would probably leave. For all that he wasn't ready to get into things, Matt knew he didn't want that.
"He's okay. He's a good kid," Matt said. He looked at the bottle in his hands then deposited it on the coffee table. "He asks for her. He wants his mom."
"That's understandable. What did you tell him?"
Matt's eyes were downcast. He shrugged his shoulders before answering. "That she's gone away. Jess didn't really believe in God so it seems hypocritical to tell him she's gone to heaven."
"I think he's a few years away from understanding hypocrisy," Taylor replied gently, but Matt frowned at her.
"What am I supposed to say?" he countered.
Taylor paused, uncertain. "I don't know."
Matt sighed again, not wanting to be defensive.
"Maybe I should go," said Taylor. "You probably want some peace and quiet."
"Of course." He smiled to himself, knowing he'd successfully managed to push her away. He sat where he was, not even trying to stop her. It would hardly be fair on her.
Before she had a chance to get out of her seat they heard a key in the door and Matt's parents returned with Liam. There was a bustle of activity as his father came into the living room, his arms laden with bags and beach toys. His mother followed with Liam in her arms, struggling as he squirmed against her.
"Ugh, here we are," she said, setting Liam on the floor. She looked up to see Taylor. "Oh, hello."
Matt got up to scoop Liam into a hug. The boy pushed against his chest, clearly over tired from his afternoon at the beach.
"Worn out, buddy?" Matt said, persevering in holding him as Liam rubbed at his eyes. "Did you have a good time?"
"We had a great time, didn't we Liam?" his mother said. She looked pointedly at her son. "Matthew, aren't you going to introduce us?"
Matt looked over at Taylor who was also on her feet.
"Oh, right. Taylor, these are my parents, Ray and Helen. Mom, Dad - Taylor Wethersby."
"It's nice to meet you both," Taylor said with a genuine smile, stepping forward to shake both their hands. She remembered Ray's kind face from the photograph in Matt's office, and his mother seemed just as friendly.
"Taylor, we spoke on the phone, didn't we?" Helen asked. "You're Matt's friend from work."
"That's right."
"Oh, aren't you beautiful?" she said, taking hold of Taylor's hand again and giving it a pat. "Isn't she beautiful, Ray?"
"Alright, Mom," Matt interrupted.
"You didn't tell us how gorgeous she is, Matthew. And a lawyer?"
"And this is where we change the topic of conversation," Matt said smoothly to avoid any further embarrassment for himself or Taylor. "I'm gonna give Liam a bath before he crashes."
"We can do that, can't we, Ray? You have company," she said to Matt. She held out her arms for Liam.
"Mom, it's fine..."
"Nonsense, you and Taylor go on with what you were doing. We'll sort Liam out. Won't we?" she said animatedly for Liam's sake. "Come on then!"
"I haven't bathed a child in almost thirty years," Ray mumbled as Helen passed Liam over to him. She bustled ahead to the bathroom.
"Sorry about that," Matt said when they were gone.
Taylor grinned. "It's okay. They're great."
Matt smiled back at her. He was relieved his parents had come to visit and could hardly be annoyed at his mother for the glint in her eye when she saw Taylor. He hadn't told them much about her, but he'd said enough that his mom had gleaned something was going on between them.
"So, I should go and leave you to it," Taylor said, but this time the mood was lighter between them.
Matt opened his mouth to speak but then his mother reappeared, wiping her hands on a towel. Her face was full of anticipation.
"You're staying for dinner, aren't you Taylor? We're having my special chicken."
"Mom, Taylor has to go," Matt said quickly so she didn't have to make up an excuse.
"Really? That's such a shame. We haven't had a chance to get to know you."
"Oh well," Taylor stammered. "I don't want to intrude on your time together..."
"Don't be silly. Now's the time for friends as well as family. Please stay."
Taylor glanced at Matt in case he didn't want her there, but he didn't look like he minded.
"Sure, I'd love to," Taylor replied, causing Helen to beam.
"Wonderful. Matthew, set that oven. We'll be done in here shortly."
Helen disappeared in to the bathroom again. Matt shook his head at Taylor.
"Are you crazy?" he asked. "You should have escaped while you had the chance."
"Go turn the oven on, Matthew," she replied, giving him a slight shove. She felt happy when she saw the smile reappear on his face. Given the day he'd had it made her hopeful that the old Matt wasn't too far from the surface. She missed him.
0 0 0 0
As it turned out, Matt needn't have worried. Dinner was actually quite pleasant. His mother managed to tone down her inquisition of Taylor and kept the embarrassing stories from his childhood to a minimum.
They didn't talk about Jessica's wake. In fact, they didn't talk about her at all. Taylor wasn't sure if it was because his parents sensed he didn't want to discuss it, or if it was too painful for them too. She knew from Matt how much they had cared for Jessica. Instead Helen told them how much Liam had loved the beach, and the plans they had to take him back before they returned to Santa Barbara at the end of the week.
Taylor learned that Matt got his sense of humor from his mother and his quiet resolve from his father. She found herself sharing details of her life that she hadn't even told Matt yet. They chatted for hours over dinner and coffee, but Taylor was still surprised when she glanced at her watch and saw that it was approaching eleven o'clock. Liam had long been asleep, and Ray was stifling a series of yawns. She got up to help Matt clear the table and, after a swift, wordless exchange between his parents, they announced they were going to bed.
"Dinner was lovely, Helen," Taylor said after depositing the plates in the kitchen.
"Thank you, sweetheart. I'm so glad we got to meet you properly. Matt's a lucky man." She patted Taylor's hand again.
"Oh." Taylor blushed slightly, wondering just what she knew about their comfortable if undefined relationship.
"We'll see you before we go, I hope?"
"Sure," Taylor replied, unsure what else to say.
"Night all," said Ray with a wave of his hand as he passed by.
Helen stepped into the kitchen to kiss Matt's cheek and give him a comforting hug. She didn't have to say anything to him about Jessica, her sympathy and understanding went unspoken. Matt forced a smile in gratitude. Taylor turned away to gather more from the table and to give them a moment alone.
"She's a keeper, Matthew, that's all I'll say," murmured Helen as an aside.
Matt led her away from the kitchen. "Yes, and she has pretty good hearing too, so why don't we talk about this some other time."
Helen smiled indulgently and called out goodnight to Taylor, who'd heard every word. Matt returned to the dining room with only a hint of color on his cheeks.
"I like your mom," Taylor said which, even though it was the truth, was mainly to annoy him.
"She's a peach."
They cleared the rest of the table in a companionable silence, but Matt put a stop to any more cleaning up.
"I'll do it later," he said. "Beer?"
Though it was late and she had work in the morning, Taylor knew he wouldn't offer if he didn't want her to stay. Maybe he needed it too. She accepted a bottle. They walked out onto on his balcony, enjoying the warm night air with just a hint of breeze that made it refreshing.
"A toast?" Taylor said, holding out her beer.
Matt hesitated only slightly before clinking his bottle against it. "To Jess," he said quietly.
"To Jess."
They both took a swig of beer. Matt's mood was immediately contemplative.
"Thank you for staying tonight," he said after a long pause.
"I'm glad I did. Your mother promised to send me the photo of you in the cowboy chaps."
"I'll remind you again I was three at the time. I didn't know you were supposed to put pants on under them."
Taylor smiled as she brought the beer to her lips again.
"You're going to call me pardner at work now, aren't you?" he asked ruefully.
"It might come to that."
They shared a grin.
"When are you coming back do you think?" she asked, trying to keep the hint of hope from her voice. She didn't want to put him under any extra pressure, but she was looking forward to having him around the office again. It wasn't the same without him.
"I still have a couple weeks vacation. I didn't think..." Matt stopped himself. He had known Jessica's time was near when he took his leave, but he thought he would have more time with her. Instead he had the next two weeks to get Liam settled in his new home, just the two of them. His parents were going back to work and he couldn't make them stay any longer, much as he would have liked to.
"Are you okay?" she asked gently.
He sniffed in response. "I'll be fine. I have to be, right?"
Taylor nodded slightly, not knowing what else to say. She had been surprised when Matt had agreed to be Liam's guardian because raising a child seemed so incongruous with what he wanted out of life. She didn't doubt he could do it - Matt was capable at most things, and downright exceptional at some. But he lived life the way he wanted, focused on the things that were important to him, and it was only by sheer good fortune that Taylor was in a place in her life where she wanted the same things. It was the only reason they were together, that much she knew. Taylor was unsure what would happen now his priorities were forced to change literally overnight.
"Liam's a good kid," she said.
"Yeah, he is." Matt smiled at the thought of him. "Here's hoping I don't screw it up."
He raised his beer bottle again but she didn't toast him this time.
"You were great with him tonight. Thank you," Matt went on quickly, covering his own uncertainty. "He was pretty grumpy because he was so tired."
"He was fine," Taylor assured him. "I don't have a lot of experience with kids but he's pretty great."
"I'm glad you think so. Want to get married?"
Taylor half-choked on the beer she was swallowing and looked up to catch the joking expression on his face. He smiled apologetically.
"You're hilarious," she replied.
"Well, the kid needs a mom..." Matt stopped, unable to keep the joke going. He had been trying to avoid thinking about Jessica but it was becoming increasingly hard. He swallowed with difficulty, feeling the emotion wash over him that he'd been keeping at bay for days.
"Matt, it's okay," said Taylor. She set her beer on the table and did the same to his. Though he was studiously avoiding her gaze she ducked her eyes to catch his and then smiled reassuringly at him. Taylor wrapped her arms around him and held him tightly.
He held onto her, drawing her even closer. The ache in his chest grew worse as he struggled to keep it together.
"God, I miss her," he managed to whisper eventually.
"I know."
Taylor held on and didn't let go. She wasn't prepared for how much his grief affected her. He had never really needed her before, but she felt his desperation as he clung to her. She couldn't help that it frightened her a little. Carefully she peeled herself away, not wanting to embarrass him. She gently wiped his cheeks and tried not to look into his reddened, unfocused eyes. Taylor kissed him tenderly. Words would not suffice.
With his forehead resting against hers, Matt took a few deep breaths to compose himself.
"You'd better go," he said. "I don't think my mom could contain herself if she found you here in the morning. She'd be registering us at Bed, Bath and Beyond before you could blink."
"Hmm, I need some new towels," Taylor replied lightly.
He smiled faintly as he pressed his lips against hers again.
Matt walked her down to her car, their arms hung loosely around each other's waists. Neither of them spoke. She had already opened her car door and was about to get inside when his hand caught hers.
"Thank you for staying, for being here today," he said numbly. "I don't know..."
"It's okay," she replied so he didn't have to clarify. "Anytime."
She gave him a last smile which faded when he tucked a blond curl behind her ear with the gentlest of touches.
"I'll see you." Matt stepped back so she could get into her car.
She hoped he couldn't see the way her fingers fumbled with the key inside the darkened vehicle before she drove away.