(no subject)
Not a great evening. Rep went wayy over because Kelly talks too much, no good ice cream at dinner, practicing was kind of rough, it's cold and rainy. Then, at intermission of the band concert, I realized that I have this weekend and M-Th of next week to do all of my music history listening sheets (there're like 14) and learn all the materials for the test since my parents and my grandmother are coming next weekend.
Gah. Plus, Erin's mom is coming this weekend, Julie's going home this weekend, Betty and Emily both saw their parents last weekend, and even tho I'm going to see mine in a week, I'm still just sad and kind of jealous. I wish I could just call my parents up and say "Hey, will you come visit this weekend?" or better, "Can I come home for the weekend?" It's awful for me to be jealous, and I really am happy for my girls who are able to see their families so much, but it's just making me kind of homesick. I'm listening to my "depressing'' playlist on itunes too...it's helpful. Just kidding. I mean, these songs aren't really all depressing, but they're songs that make me sad or homesick. I think sometimes when I feel this way, I just need to get it out and cry for a while and then feel better. I've really been doing better with it this year so far, but I'm just sad tonight.
Also, it's kind of sinking in that I don't get to go home for fall break. It's going to be fun...Betty and I are going to do stuff; but I still am sad that just about everyone is going home and I can't. Again, this is my fault: I picked a school that is too far to go home. Ever. But a girl's allowed to be sad sometimes, right? And hey, I'm so much closer than some people. I know kids from Colorado and California and Florida and Oregon and Washington. They're all much farther from home than I am. They probably won't see their families at all before Thanksgiving. I'm lucky I get to see mine at all.
Ugh, I need to stop wallowing. I just kind of like wallowing. Agh. Such a drama queen.
Oh yeah...opera auditions are tomorrow. I'm not stressing. I don't have a prayer. Including chorus, there are 9 spots for girls. I'm just doing it for the experience. Hopefully it will be good. I should memorize the fairytale I'm telling for that...hm...
Ok, bedtime. Maybe when I wake up I'll feel better...
Gah. Plus, Erin's mom is coming this weekend, Julie's going home this weekend, Betty and Emily both saw their parents last weekend, and even tho I'm going to see mine in a week, I'm still just sad and kind of jealous. I wish I could just call my parents up and say "Hey, will you come visit this weekend?" or better, "Can I come home for the weekend?" It's awful for me to be jealous, and I really am happy for my girls who are able to see their families so much, but it's just making me kind of homesick. I'm listening to my "depressing'' playlist on itunes too...it's helpful. Just kidding. I mean, these songs aren't really all depressing, but they're songs that make me sad or homesick. I think sometimes when I feel this way, I just need to get it out and cry for a while and then feel better. I've really been doing better with it this year so far, but I'm just sad tonight.
Also, it's kind of sinking in that I don't get to go home for fall break. It's going to be fun...Betty and I are going to do stuff; but I still am sad that just about everyone is going home and I can't. Again, this is my fault: I picked a school that is too far to go home. Ever. But a girl's allowed to be sad sometimes, right? And hey, I'm so much closer than some people. I know kids from Colorado and California and Florida and Oregon and Washington. They're all much farther from home than I am. They probably won't see their families at all before Thanksgiving. I'm lucky I get to see mine at all.
Ugh, I need to stop wallowing. I just kind of like wallowing. Agh. Such a drama queen.
Oh yeah...opera auditions are tomorrow. I'm not stressing. I don't have a prayer. Including chorus, there are 9 spots for girls. I'm just doing it for the experience. Hopefully it will be good. I should memorize the fairytale I'm telling for that...hm...
Ok, bedtime. Maybe when I wake up I'll feel better...