Rightwing wingnut says soy makes you gay...wee sleekit beastie in my house
Your eyeroll of the day: http://worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=53327
Soy milk and tofu are turning your kids GAY! And God hid dinosaur bones in the ground 6,000 years ago when the Earth was created just to test your faith. And, P.S., the world is flat (Here Be Dragons!) but somehow space people and Atlantis refugees live in the center of the planet (it's flat, but it's round like a ball, too).
My head hurts. I'm going to go enjoy some soy milk Egg Nog now. Though "enjoy" is a bit too exaggerated as it's not very tasty. It has an aluminium aftertaste to it. But, hey, maybe it will turn me gay. It's all for the sake of scientific research. I'll let you know how it turns out. *sip, wince* I don't feel gay yet. *sip sip, cringe* Still not gay. Maybe if it tasted better I'd be gay already?
In other news, I found a wee brown mousie in the hallway. Critter tally in the house: suspected squirrels, one tentatively identified rat-sized thing, one small mousie (sick), various and sundry insect life, lizards, wee green frogs, and either two, many, or no ribbon snakes a-lurking about (depends on whether to count the two separate sightings as one snake, and whether to assume the snakes have departed or bred enthusiastically somewherein the storage area of the basement).
I have nothing against mice personally, though I wish they would live in the Out, and not in my house. I don't want diseases or damaged belongings, or mousie poo everywhere. I don't want to be awakened again by scuffling, thumping, squeaking, rustling, or other unidentifiable noises that don't belong in the In with me. People bvelong in the In, and invited animal guests like pets belong in the In, and all other creatures belong in the Out. That's the rule in this house, not that anyone is listening to me. I warned them! (This reminds me of the "Lisa" character on Six Feet Under yelling "shoo!" at ants in her kitchen. *sighs*) Sure, they don't speak English (that I know of) but I did announce to the non-rent-paying denizens of the abode that traps were going to be set that week and they had a week to vacate and find other dwelling spots. I banged on walls when I heard sounds of non-human life within. I made sure no food sources were out and gnaw-open-able. Even so, they decided tohang around, and the bait has been out for a few months now, and the disturbances have toned down a bit but persist. But this was the first animal I'd seen that chose to register a complaint in person.
I put bait out primarily for the rats I assumed were invading. Now I have found a sick little mouse, and had to pick him up and take him outside, and find him a little warm hidey-hole he could hang out in until he recouperated or went to The Big Mousehold In The Sky, and I feel somewhat guilty about it. I tried more humane ways of ridding the place of various varmints and none worked, so I finally broke down and put out the bait traps.
Poor mousie. Yeah, I know. I'm a tender-hearted sap. He was vermin. I still feel guilty.
Then again, I don't want me or Mr Woozle getting a rodent-borne disease just because I didn't react aggressively and lethally enough.
I wonder if tofu cubes in the bait traps would make my mice all gay? That way they wouldn't breed and could live happily ever after in well-decorated little mousie nooks and invite Woozle to great parties. I could handle a half dozen gay mice hanging out. It's the white trash mice that make big messes everywhere and make loud noises all night and steal my stuff and leave crap on the floor and leave little mouse chew-mark graffiti here and there and have forty-two kids they can't afford to raise that all go on and have forty-two kids of their own before they graduate from mouse middle school that I'm most angry about. Mice forcing me to become The State and provide them with MIC cheese and Section Eek shelter. Bad, bad mice. Stampeeding hordes of inbred mice invading MY house!
Please recognize that statements about soy and rodents made in jest do not accurately reflect the beliefs or opinions of the writer as applied to actual humans. Thank you.
Soy milk and tofu are turning your kids GAY! And God hid dinosaur bones in the ground 6,000 years ago when the Earth was created just to test your faith. And, P.S., the world is flat (Here Be Dragons!) but somehow space people and Atlantis refugees live in the center of the planet (it's flat, but it's round like a ball, too).
My head hurts. I'm going to go enjoy some soy milk Egg Nog now. Though "enjoy" is a bit too exaggerated as it's not very tasty. It has an aluminium aftertaste to it. But, hey, maybe it will turn me gay. It's all for the sake of scientific research. I'll let you know how it turns out. *sip, wince* I don't feel gay yet. *sip sip, cringe* Still not gay. Maybe if it tasted better I'd be gay already?
In other news, I found a wee brown mousie in the hallway. Critter tally in the house: suspected squirrels, one tentatively identified rat-sized thing, one small mousie (sick), various and sundry insect life, lizards, wee green frogs, and either two, many, or no ribbon snakes a-lurking about (depends on whether to count the two separate sightings as one snake, and whether to assume the snakes have departed or bred enthusiastically somewherein the storage area of the basement).
I have nothing against mice personally, though I wish they would live in the Out, and not in my house. I don't want diseases or damaged belongings, or mousie poo everywhere. I don't want to be awakened again by scuffling, thumping, squeaking, rustling, or other unidentifiable noises that don't belong in the In with me. People bvelong in the In, and invited animal guests like pets belong in the In, and all other creatures belong in the Out. That's the rule in this house, not that anyone is listening to me. I warned them! (This reminds me of the "Lisa" character on Six Feet Under yelling "shoo!" at ants in her kitchen. *sighs*) Sure, they don't speak English (that I know of) but I did announce to the non-rent-paying denizens of the abode that traps were going to be set that week and they had a week to vacate and find other dwelling spots. I banged on walls when I heard sounds of non-human life within. I made sure no food sources were out and gnaw-open-able. Even so, they decided tohang around, and the bait has been out for a few months now, and the disturbances have toned down a bit but persist. But this was the first animal I'd seen that chose to register a complaint in person.
I put bait out primarily for the rats I assumed were invading. Now I have found a sick little mouse, and had to pick him up and take him outside, and find him a little warm hidey-hole he could hang out in until he recouperated or went to The Big Mousehold In The Sky, and I feel somewhat guilty about it. I tried more humane ways of ridding the place of various varmints and none worked, so I finally broke down and put out the bait traps.
Poor mousie. Yeah, I know. I'm a tender-hearted sap. He was vermin. I still feel guilty.
Then again, I don't want me or Mr Woozle getting a rodent-borne disease just because I didn't react aggressively and lethally enough.
I wonder if tofu cubes in the bait traps would make my mice all gay? That way they wouldn't breed and could live happily ever after in well-decorated little mousie nooks and invite Woozle to great parties. I could handle a half dozen gay mice hanging out. It's the white trash mice that make big messes everywhere and make loud noises all night and steal my stuff and leave crap on the floor and leave little mouse chew-mark graffiti here and there and have forty-two kids they can't afford to raise that all go on and have forty-two kids of their own before they graduate from mouse middle school that I'm most angry about. Mice forcing me to become The State and provide them with MIC cheese and Section Eek shelter. Bad, bad mice. Stampeeding hordes of inbred mice invading MY house!
Please recognize that statements about soy and rodents made in jest do not accurately reflect the beliefs or opinions of the writer as applied to actual humans. Thank you.