Friday...awaiting Saturday my Monday
I went home finally from Dave's hectic household. We fought over dumb things without glorious makeup sex, which causes me further anxiety. I feel like I would rather spend the money in gas commuting to work from my own home, then stay there and be half-assed at my job. They have been bugging me about how many searches I use or how long my calls are. And what reward do I get when I accomplish this anyways? They have a raise freeze on STILL despite the fact that many companies have taken them off themselves. They become cheaper and cheaper with our employment benefits. And I only stay there because I broke my friggin lower vertebraes and am afraid that I may not be able to do much physical labour at any other job. Actually I KNOW I can't. So I'm trapped. And for now I'm trapped living at my parents and him living at his because even together we cannot afford an apartment, my car insurance, repairs, etc. I'm so broke I had to ask him for 40 dollars to get through the week for gas money. And I can't buy lunch so I don't eat at work. But if they didn't have a raise freeze on, maybe just maybe, I would be able to afford these slight extra things in life. I want to leave this job, it isn't making me feel good either physically or mentally. And the house we stay at...with a woman who bore him having a possible personality disorder...being fakely nice t you only only to complain later. The words "I love you" spoken to any friend or family member or adopted family member should be real, or don't say them