PUKE.
I had to clean up puke tonight. I effing hate children. And their mothers who don't even offer to clean it up, just walk away and say can you get someone to clean this up, my son threw up on the floor.
Yeah let me just get right on that with a long line of people and my CSR on her lunch.
So Sal wanted to talk about what happened on Friday night. And I really didn't. I was trying to do my best to pretend the whole thing hadn't taken place.
He said that he had never been in love and didn't know what it felt like. That he cares for me a whole lot, and did not like the distance that developed between us during the time we were pretending what happened did. I told him that I felt retarded for telling him since I put a whole lot of myself out there, and made myself pretty effing vulnerable and he told me he didn't feel the same. He said that he didn't think that, and that he thought he had pretty much ruined everything by the look on my face when he said what he said. I figured I had done the same thing, that he wasn't going to want to be with me anymore. He said now he wishes he hadn't said anything at all. And like I said, I'm not sure that would have been the best move, or like callmedirk said, saying thank you. I made it clear that I'm not wanting him to say something that isn't true, or something he doesn't feel. If he doesn't, but he cares enough to stick around and see then I guess that's cool. He came over later, asking if he could see me.
I feel better about the situation, but by no means completely better. Believe me, if I could take it back and make it never happen...I would. I mean that momentary OMG I finally said it, YAY, was totally squashed by what he said.
My computer is retarded and if Yahoo doesn't download my new toolbar so I don't get popups anymore I'm going to scream.
Also Teegan is trying desperately to lose her new home, by being a hateful bitch and also by running out of the apartment at any chance she can find. I just had to toss her out of my room because she was just biting my feet. Not even for a reason, I'm not moving them or anything. Sometimes I don't like her too much.
Tomorrow I'm sleeping in (Yeah fucking right, I live with Teegan Marlow) and doing a bit of running around. Oh and buying Transformers, because OMG best movie EVER!
I also need to write something, type stuff up. My 100_situations fic has been leering at me for almost two years. I can't handle it anymore.
Also...tomorrow is NCIS!Tuesday!
Rose is doing better, I spoke to her twice today, she calls me for her meltdown which always makes me feel better. I'm taking a weekend off in two weeks to go up and see her, and just be there with her. She's doing better than I expected, but then again it's Rose. She's amazing.
Yeah let me just get right on that with a long line of people and my CSR on her lunch.
So Sal wanted to talk about what happened on Friday night. And I really didn't. I was trying to do my best to pretend the whole thing hadn't taken place.
He said that he had never been in love and didn't know what it felt like. That he cares for me a whole lot, and did not like the distance that developed between us during the time we were pretending what happened did. I told him that I felt retarded for telling him since I put a whole lot of myself out there, and made myself pretty effing vulnerable and he told me he didn't feel the same. He said that he didn't think that, and that he thought he had pretty much ruined everything by the look on my face when he said what he said. I figured I had done the same thing, that he wasn't going to want to be with me anymore. He said now he wishes he hadn't said anything at all. And like I said, I'm not sure that would have been the best move, or like callmedirk said, saying thank you. I made it clear that I'm not wanting him to say something that isn't true, or something he doesn't feel. If he doesn't, but he cares enough to stick around and see then I guess that's cool. He came over later, asking if he could see me.
I feel better about the situation, but by no means completely better. Believe me, if I could take it back and make it never happen...I would. I mean that momentary OMG I finally said it, YAY, was totally squashed by what he said.
My computer is retarded and if Yahoo doesn't download my new toolbar so I don't get popups anymore I'm going to scream.
Also Teegan is trying desperately to lose her new home, by being a hateful bitch and also by running out of the apartment at any chance she can find. I just had to toss her out of my room because she was just biting my feet. Not even for a reason, I'm not moving them or anything. Sometimes I don't like her too much.
Tomorrow I'm sleeping in (Yeah fucking right, I live with Teegan Marlow) and doing a bit of running around. Oh and buying Transformers, because OMG best movie EVER!
I also need to write something, type stuff up. My 100_situations fic has been leering at me for almost two years. I can't handle it anymore.
Also...tomorrow is NCIS!Tuesday!
Rose is doing better, I spoke to her twice today, she calls me for her meltdown which always makes me feel better. I'm taking a weekend off in two weeks to go up and see her, and just be there with her. She's doing better than I expected, but then again it's Rose. She's amazing.