All's Fair in Love and War; Ch. 2
Title:All's Fair in Love and War (2/3)
Pairing: James/Lily, Snape/Lily
Rating: PG-13 (for one hot kiss and some cross-dressing)
Summary: Sirius thought it would be funny to tell Snape a little lie and see where it took him. Little did he know that some unexpected lines were about to be crossed. Naturally, as James' best friend, he has to do everything in his power to stop it.
Disclaimer: Recognize it? Then it's not mine. All I own in the plot.
A Note: This fic is goofy and off the wall. Do not read if your sense of humor isn't intact.
"Lily?" Snape whispered, standing much closer to her than he ever had in his life. "Could I speak to you for a moment?"
Surprised at his gentle request and the absence of the word "mudblood," she agreed, to appease her curiosity. "Um. . .yeah, okay. Sure." Together, they wandered into a far corner of the dungeon outside potions.
"Lily. . ." he crooned, softly, sweetly, even what some would consider lovingly, "will you go out with me?"
Dead beats of silence throbbed in Snape's ears as he waited, patiently but anxiously, for her reply.
James and Sirius, in the other far corner of the dungeon, under James' Invisibility Cloak, were also waiting for her answer. "You know," Sirius whispered to his friend, "he's not doing bad. She may even say yes."
James made a noise somehow halfway between a whine and a growl and fixed his attention to Lily. He nearly fainted when he heard what she said.
"Yeah, okay," Lily said, her green eyes twinkling in the dim light. She smiled at Snape. "I'd like that."
James spat more than a few expletives under his breath, but Sirius only sniggered.
"What's so funny?" James demanded, watching Lily and Snape leave, hand in hand.
"What happens when they get married? Can you see their kids?" He sniggered again.
"SHE WON'T MARRY HIM!" James thundered, throwing off the Cloak and running into the hallway.
"Hold up, mate," Sirius shouted, "I want to see their first date before he break them up."
"Why?" James demanded.
"For the funny, of course," Sirius replied. When James glared at him, he added, "Even you have to admit, that'll be hilarious."
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Severus, where are we going?" Lily demanded, though her giggling reduced the effect of her request.
"Be patient, we'll be there soon," he replied, casting a glance at her, still disbelieving his good fortune. Lily Evans wanted him, had denied James Potter and all his annoying charms to be with quiet, plain, lanky Severus. It's insane, he thought, to think that anything this sweet could lead to anything but harm. But, for now, it feels good. His inner ramblings led them to Le Baton, the only sit-down, black-robe dinner affair in Hogsmeade. It had taken nearly all of his savings to afford the reservation for that evening, but he knew it had to be perfect. Everything had to be perfect for Lily.
Lily deserved only the best.
"We're here," he told her, and smiled inwardly when Lily's green eyes shone with excitement.
"This is where we're eating? Oh, Severus, I couldn't possibly. . .I'm not dressed for it. . .it must have cost a fortune!"
"It wasn't much," he lied, but Lily shook her head.
"Do you expect me to believe that? I've heard about this place, it's supposed to be very high-end. Oh, thank you!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around Snape's scrawny frame.
Severus stiffened slightly at her touch, but soon relaxed and patted her on the back awkwardly.
"You're welcome." He checked his watch habitually, and realized they were running behind.
"We're late! Come on!"
They rushed inside, chuckling and joking, vainly trying to make their reservation.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Wormtail! Are you dressed yet?" Sirius yelled at Peter, who was still holed up in his closet, refusing to come out.
"Do I really have to wear it?" he whined plaintively.
"Does he?" James muttered.
Sirius grinned. "Not really," he replied to James, but to Peter, he called, "Do you want the plan to work? Do you want Lily to wind up with Snivellous?"
"No!" Peter squeaked, and the door cracked open. "But, Sirius-"
"No time! We're running late! Yeesh!" And Sirius dragged Peter out of the closet, who looked rather dashing in his powder blue cocktail dress. "You look lovely, darling," he chortled.
"Very flattering," James added, throwing on his Invisibility Cloak and heading for the staircase.
"Come on, turtledoves, we're already behind."
The three boys set off for the statue of the one-eyed witch, and Hogsmeade.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
Soft candlelight cast shadows across the table, and Lily's face was thrown into just the right light. Even Severus felt that he could forget who he was, where he came from, and allow himself to fall in love.
If such an emotion even existed, which he seriously doubted. "Are you enjoying yourself, Lily?" he asked politely, and perhaps too formally.
"Very much, Severus," she replied, covering his hand with hers. Maybe he wasn't being too formal, after all.
For a moment, everything was perfect, but something Snape saw across the room considerably darkened his mood.
Why on earth were Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew at Le Baton? And why was Peter wearing that dress?
Whatever their intentions were, Severus knew they weren't benign. "Son of a horned toad. . ." he muttered darkly, his eyes losing the shine that Lily's affection had brought to them.
"What's wrong?" Lily asked shrewdly, her kindness and concern enveloping him.
He knew he couldn't let her evening be ruined by the presence of those imbeciles. "Nothing, dear," he replied, the pet name rolling easily off his tongue, feeling completely, one-hundred percent natural.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Do stop fidgeting, Wormtail, it's not becoming," Sirius scolded.
"I can't help it! This skirt keeps riding up on me! And these panties. . ." He squirmed in his seat in a futile attempt to make himself comfortable.
"Do you honestly think a woman would squirm if her panties pinched a bit? No, she would not! She would sit still, in pain but retaining her dignity! Are you a woman, Wormtail, or are you a squirming rat?"
"I'm a woman!" Peter protested, and stopped moving.
"Good, because here come our desserts."
Peter was good, and remained still, right up until the waiter approached their table, when a sudden twitch seized him. At, of course, the completely wrong time. His leg spasm tripped the pudding-laid waiter, sending him flying into Lily Evans.
Dripping with chocolate, she shrieked and stood up suddenly. "What is the matter with you?" she demanded of the apologizing waiter.
"I'm terribly sorry, madam, please, don't be angry," the waiter pleaded, but Lily was looking past him now, her eyes boring into-
-Sirius.
"Sirius Black! What are you doing here?" she thundered, raising up her own bowl of pudding and sending it at him. Sadly, she missed, and the poor wizard who got hit with it sent his own dessert at Severus, whom he thought had thrown it in the first place. He missed, as well, hitting something that ought to have been nothing, and which loudly exclaimed, "Ow!"
The bowl had tugged away his Cloak, revealing James Potter.
Lily was beside herself. "What are you doing here? You can't possibly tell me it was a date, I can't think of a single person who'd date you."
"I was spying on you," James admitted meekly, deciding that honesty was the best policy. "I'm sorry."
"No, you're not! You're sorry you got caught!" Lily screamed, and ran out of the restaurant.
Snape shot James a look of the deepest contempt, and perhaps a bit of gloating, and went after Lily.
In the meelee, Sirius and Peter had slipped out.
"My life is over," James proclaimed darkly.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Lily, please! Lily!" Snape called out to her, but she was still moving away, tearing at her chocolate-stained robes and sobbing. "Where are you going?"
"Back to Hogwarts. Or I'll wait by the carriages until everyone else shows up. I just want to be alone right now."
"Are you mad at me?" Severus asked timidly, sweetly, innocently.
She turned to look at him. Despite her pudding-layered hair and robes, and her eyes, bloodshot from crying, or maybe even because of her current imperfections, she was the most strikingly beautiful witch he'd ever seen. "No, Severus, I'm not mad at you," she replied, softly, lovingly.
For a moment, they were frozen in time, a warm spring breeze playing about them, the traffic of Hogsmeade milling around, green eyes and her bright red hair, onyx eyes and ebony tresses. Their gaze was frantic and hungry as they strove to retain the image of each other in the evening light.
And then the moment was gone, and Lily somehow found herself moving towards him, and he was opening his arms to her, holding her more tenderly than he'd ever have thought possible, and she laid her head on his chest, comfortable.
"I'm sorry, Severus," she breathed softly, warming against him with every word. "I'm sorry that I ruined our dinner."
"You didn't," he replied, enjoying the feel of her body cradled in his arms, "That dolt Potter and his dolt friends did."
Lily looked up at him. "Does the entire evening have to be ruined now, because of that?" she asked, sounding to him like a child begging not to leave a toy store.
"No," he said, startled, "We could go to Honeydukes, or ma-"
Reaching up to meet him, Lily placed her lips tentatively over his, waiting for his response before she carried their kiss any farther. His soft reply was all the encouragement she needed, and she deepened the kiss slowly, letting him taste her lips and enjoying the surprisingly pleasant taste of his.
It was Severus' first kiss.
Pairing: James/Lily, Snape/Lily
Rating: PG-13 (for one hot kiss and some cross-dressing)
Summary: Sirius thought it would be funny to tell Snape a little lie and see where it took him. Little did he know that some unexpected lines were about to be crossed. Naturally, as James' best friend, he has to do everything in his power to stop it.
Disclaimer: Recognize it? Then it's not mine. All I own in the plot.
A Note: This fic is goofy and off the wall. Do not read if your sense of humor isn't intact.
"Lily?" Snape whispered, standing much closer to her than he ever had in his life. "Could I speak to you for a moment?"
Surprised at his gentle request and the absence of the word "mudblood," she agreed, to appease her curiosity. "Um. . .yeah, okay. Sure." Together, they wandered into a far corner of the dungeon outside potions.
"Lily. . ." he crooned, softly, sweetly, even what some would consider lovingly, "will you go out with me?"
Dead beats of silence throbbed in Snape's ears as he waited, patiently but anxiously, for her reply.
James and Sirius, in the other far corner of the dungeon, under James' Invisibility Cloak, were also waiting for her answer. "You know," Sirius whispered to his friend, "he's not doing bad. She may even say yes."
James made a noise somehow halfway between a whine and a growl and fixed his attention to Lily. He nearly fainted when he heard what she said.
"Yeah, okay," Lily said, her green eyes twinkling in the dim light. She smiled at Snape. "I'd like that."
James spat more than a few expletives under his breath, but Sirius only sniggered.
"What's so funny?" James demanded, watching Lily and Snape leave, hand in hand.
"What happens when they get married? Can you see their kids?" He sniggered again.
"SHE WON'T MARRY HIM!" James thundered, throwing off the Cloak and running into the hallway.
"Hold up, mate," Sirius shouted, "I want to see their first date before he break them up."
"Why?" James demanded.
"For the funny, of course," Sirius replied. When James glared at him, he added, "Even you have to admit, that'll be hilarious."
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Severus, where are we going?" Lily demanded, though her giggling reduced the effect of her request.
"Be patient, we'll be there soon," he replied, casting a glance at her, still disbelieving his good fortune. Lily Evans wanted him, had denied James Potter and all his annoying charms to be with quiet, plain, lanky Severus. It's insane, he thought, to think that anything this sweet could lead to anything but harm. But, for now, it feels good. His inner ramblings led them to Le Baton, the only sit-down, black-robe dinner affair in Hogsmeade. It had taken nearly all of his savings to afford the reservation for that evening, but he knew it had to be perfect. Everything had to be perfect for Lily.
Lily deserved only the best.
"We're here," he told her, and smiled inwardly when Lily's green eyes shone with excitement.
"This is where we're eating? Oh, Severus, I couldn't possibly. . .I'm not dressed for it. . .it must have cost a fortune!"
"It wasn't much," he lied, but Lily shook her head.
"Do you expect me to believe that? I've heard about this place, it's supposed to be very high-end. Oh, thank you!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around Snape's scrawny frame.
Severus stiffened slightly at her touch, but soon relaxed and patted her on the back awkwardly.
"You're welcome." He checked his watch habitually, and realized they were running behind.
"We're late! Come on!"
They rushed inside, chuckling and joking, vainly trying to make their reservation.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Wormtail! Are you dressed yet?" Sirius yelled at Peter, who was still holed up in his closet, refusing to come out.
"Do I really have to wear it?" he whined plaintively.
"Does he?" James muttered.
Sirius grinned. "Not really," he replied to James, but to Peter, he called, "Do you want the plan to work? Do you want Lily to wind up with Snivellous?"
"No!" Peter squeaked, and the door cracked open. "But, Sirius-"
"No time! We're running late! Yeesh!" And Sirius dragged Peter out of the closet, who looked rather dashing in his powder blue cocktail dress. "You look lovely, darling," he chortled.
"Very flattering," James added, throwing on his Invisibility Cloak and heading for the staircase.
"Come on, turtledoves, we're already behind."
The three boys set off for the statue of the one-eyed witch, and Hogsmeade.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
Soft candlelight cast shadows across the table, and Lily's face was thrown into just the right light. Even Severus felt that he could forget who he was, where he came from, and allow himself to fall in love.
If such an emotion even existed, which he seriously doubted. "Are you enjoying yourself, Lily?" he asked politely, and perhaps too formally.
"Very much, Severus," she replied, covering his hand with hers. Maybe he wasn't being too formal, after all.
For a moment, everything was perfect, but something Snape saw across the room considerably darkened his mood.
Why on earth were Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew at Le Baton? And why was Peter wearing that dress?
Whatever their intentions were, Severus knew they weren't benign. "Son of a horned toad. . ." he muttered darkly, his eyes losing the shine that Lily's affection had brought to them.
"What's wrong?" Lily asked shrewdly, her kindness and concern enveloping him.
He knew he couldn't let her evening be ruined by the presence of those imbeciles. "Nothing, dear," he replied, the pet name rolling easily off his tongue, feeling completely, one-hundred percent natural.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Do stop fidgeting, Wormtail, it's not becoming," Sirius scolded.
"I can't help it! This skirt keeps riding up on me! And these panties. . ." He squirmed in his seat in a futile attempt to make himself comfortable.
"Do you honestly think a woman would squirm if her panties pinched a bit? No, she would not! She would sit still, in pain but retaining her dignity! Are you a woman, Wormtail, or are you a squirming rat?"
"I'm a woman!" Peter protested, and stopped moving.
"Good, because here come our desserts."
Peter was good, and remained still, right up until the waiter approached their table, when a sudden twitch seized him. At, of course, the completely wrong time. His leg spasm tripped the pudding-laid waiter, sending him flying into Lily Evans.
Dripping with chocolate, she shrieked and stood up suddenly. "What is the matter with you?" she demanded of the apologizing waiter.
"I'm terribly sorry, madam, please, don't be angry," the waiter pleaded, but Lily was looking past him now, her eyes boring into-
-Sirius.
"Sirius Black! What are you doing here?" she thundered, raising up her own bowl of pudding and sending it at him. Sadly, she missed, and the poor wizard who got hit with it sent his own dessert at Severus, whom he thought had thrown it in the first place. He missed, as well, hitting something that ought to have been nothing, and which loudly exclaimed, "Ow!"
The bowl had tugged away his Cloak, revealing James Potter.
Lily was beside herself. "What are you doing here? You can't possibly tell me it was a date, I can't think of a single person who'd date you."
"I was spying on you," James admitted meekly, deciding that honesty was the best policy. "I'm sorry."
"No, you're not! You're sorry you got caught!" Lily screamed, and ran out of the restaurant.
Snape shot James a look of the deepest contempt, and perhaps a bit of gloating, and went after Lily.
In the meelee, Sirius and Peter had slipped out.
"My life is over," James proclaimed darkly.
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
"Lily, please! Lily!" Snape called out to her, but she was still moving away, tearing at her chocolate-stained robes and sobbing. "Where are you going?"
"Back to Hogwarts. Or I'll wait by the carriages until everyone else shows up. I just want to be alone right now."
"Are you mad at me?" Severus asked timidly, sweetly, innocently.
She turned to look at him. Despite her pudding-layered hair and robes, and her eyes, bloodshot from crying, or maybe even because of her current imperfections, she was the most strikingly beautiful witch he'd ever seen. "No, Severus, I'm not mad at you," she replied, softly, lovingly.
For a moment, they were frozen in time, a warm spring breeze playing about them, the traffic of Hogsmeade milling around, green eyes and her bright red hair, onyx eyes and ebony tresses. Their gaze was frantic and hungry as they strove to retain the image of each other in the evening light.
And then the moment was gone, and Lily somehow found herself moving towards him, and he was opening his arms to her, holding her more tenderly than he'd ever have thought possible, and she laid her head on his chest, comfortable.
"I'm sorry, Severus," she breathed softly, warming against him with every word. "I'm sorry that I ruined our dinner."
"You didn't," he replied, enjoying the feel of her body cradled in his arms, "That dolt Potter and his dolt friends did."
Lily looked up at him. "Does the entire evening have to be ruined now, because of that?" she asked, sounding to him like a child begging not to leave a toy store.
"No," he said, startled, "We could go to Honeydukes, or ma-"
Reaching up to meet him, Lily placed her lips tentatively over his, waiting for his response before she carried their kiss any farther. His soft reply was all the encouragement she needed, and she deepened the kiss slowly, letting him taste her lips and enjoying the surprisingly pleasant taste of his.
It was Severus' first kiss.