Grinchy
Today, my word is Frustrated.
I am frustrated with the holiday season. I'm skipping Christmas this year, because I don't feel like playing nice and acting like everything at home is fine. Living with my Dad, his gf, and her kids. Working my ass off to move out of here. I'm being unfair, I've been told. But fuck this. My extended family had more chance to get to know this woman in the few years her and my dad have been dating than I did. I didn't even know her last name until a few days before I was moved in here. I have no respect for her because her life choices go against every value my Dad has ever taught me. Her kids are fucking comfortable as hell in MY DAD'S HOUSE because it is full of his GIRLFRIEND'S furniture.
A friend of mine came by to see the place a few days ago. She asked me why my Dad and I decided to move into his girlfriend's house. I told her it was my dad's house. She looked around and said, I don't see a single thing from you guys' place.
And you know what?
Neither do I, except in my own room. I don't even see my Dad anymore. He doesn't bother to act like he gives a shit, though of course he swears he does.
So I'm skipping Christmas, avoiding all family contact. Because you know that saying, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all? Seems like a good idea to stick with that.
Doesn't help that my boyfriend keeps telling me I'm being ridiculous,selfish, spoiled, et cetera. He and I are very opposite people, coming from very different backgrounds. I try my damnedest not to judge his life, his choices, or his familial relations. So he can pretty much fuck off when it comes to this. But it works out that I pretty much am unable to complain about anything at home, and if I ever choose to do so, I am told in just so many words by him that I am being a bitch.
Work is going great though.
I love my job, entirely and wholeheartedly. My boss is charming and makes me feel appreciated for the effort I've put in. I've become acquainted with some really amazing and varied clients, and even have a few that have rebooked with me more than once, which is such a great feeling, and completely reinforces my career choice. It's nice to have at least that. Work has become the happiest time of my day lately. I take my time when it comes to leaving the office. Home is miserable, boyfriend is miserable. While I try to cheer him up as best I can, there isn't much I can do to make things better. His life is in a downward spiral, and he has the unfortunate habit of taking it out on the one person who is closest to him. I'm not going anywhere, but I feel my patience wearing very thing sometimes lately.
So yeah, Frustrated and venting as usual. Whiney, bitchy, honest little old me. Nothing new here.
I am frustrated with the holiday season. I'm skipping Christmas this year, because I don't feel like playing nice and acting like everything at home is fine. Living with my Dad, his gf, and her kids. Working my ass off to move out of here. I'm being unfair, I've been told. But fuck this. My extended family had more chance to get to know this woman in the few years her and my dad have been dating than I did. I didn't even know her last name until a few days before I was moved in here. I have no respect for her because her life choices go against every value my Dad has ever taught me. Her kids are fucking comfortable as hell in MY DAD'S HOUSE because it is full of his GIRLFRIEND'S furniture.
A friend of mine came by to see the place a few days ago. She asked me why my Dad and I decided to move into his girlfriend's house. I told her it was my dad's house. She looked around and said, I don't see a single thing from you guys' place.
And you know what?
Neither do I, except in my own room. I don't even see my Dad anymore. He doesn't bother to act like he gives a shit, though of course he swears he does.
So I'm skipping Christmas, avoiding all family contact. Because you know that saying, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all? Seems like a good idea to stick with that.
Doesn't help that my boyfriend keeps telling me I'm being ridiculous,selfish, spoiled, et cetera. He and I are very opposite people, coming from very different backgrounds. I try my damnedest not to judge his life, his choices, or his familial relations. So he can pretty much fuck off when it comes to this. But it works out that I pretty much am unable to complain about anything at home, and if I ever choose to do so, I am told in just so many words by him that I am being a bitch.
Work is going great though.
I love my job, entirely and wholeheartedly. My boss is charming and makes me feel appreciated for the effort I've put in. I've become acquainted with some really amazing and varied clients, and even have a few that have rebooked with me more than once, which is such a great feeling, and completely reinforces my career choice. It's nice to have at least that. Work has become the happiest time of my day lately. I take my time when it comes to leaving the office. Home is miserable, boyfriend is miserable. While I try to cheer him up as best I can, there isn't much I can do to make things better. His life is in a downward spiral, and he has the unfortunate habit of taking it out on the one person who is closest to him. I'm not going anywhere, but I feel my patience wearing very thing sometimes lately.
So yeah, Frustrated and venting as usual. Whiney, bitchy, honest little old me. Nothing new here.