upd8 long overdue
I don't think I've posted here in a long time, lol.
Anyway this is what happened just now.:
Me: I've decided I'm gonna take out my hair. Final decision! (I have dreadlocks)
Mom: *disbelieving look* how are you gonna do that?
Me: You have to drench it in conditioner then use a thing to pick it out. I've done a lot of research--
Mom: Well just know you'll probably have to cut it all off.
Well first of all I don't give a shit if I have to cut it off, I just want my hair gone. It sucks when you look in the mirror every time and it's like, eew. My hair is all frizzy and messy and blah. I simply hate it at this point. Why should I hate my hair and deal with it, just because everyone fawns over it? If people want dreads they can get it on their own head, geez. But also, see, this is why I rarely say anything. Sigh...even a grunt of acknowledgement would be better. But whenever I say anything about what I'm feeling, what I want to do, etc., her answer feels (to me) like "what the hell are you doing, you're wrong, I'll tell you how to do it better" or "you can't do that at all". This is why I cut my hair shorter in the first place. I was gonna take it out then she was like nooo don't do that, here's what you should do instead. ARGHHHh. One day I'll just be like "bye guys, I'm moving out today" and they'll be like "what?" and they won't know anything because I will stop saying things out loud. LOL. No seriously, it's not cool.
Either way...I'm going to try to take my hair out. Hopefully I can find help, My mom is the worst hair person so I'm not going to depend on her at all. it's hard when you don't have friends and don't talk to your family that often. It'll be weird calling up my cousin or my aunt and saying "Hey there buddy ...I know I never call you, but do you wanna come over and help me take out my hair?"
Anyway...I don't know why I'm posting this, I was planning to delete my LJ for a bit, I've barely been on here lately because I've been doing other stuff. I spend my whole morning chained up with my dog, which is annoying but he can't be left to roam the house because he destroys things, so I have to sit with him until I'm pulling my hair out from watching too much TV. Plus soccer's on now (oops totally forgot to watch this morning). So that's the whole morning, then after that I usually watch Judge Pirro (only thing I actually enjoy watching), then I might go out and do some errands (usually only to the drugstore or library since I have nowhere else to go), then come back in time for the second soccer game, then clean the kitchen, by then it's like 3:00 already, and at that point I might get a bit of reading done or play the Sims for a few hours. So yeah basically no online time. Oh yeah, yesterday was puppy's 1st b'day :)
Anywho what else...well I've had this stomach illness for a few days now, it seems like the worst days are behind me but now my stomach won't stop growling. It never got as bad as the last time I had a stomach thing, where I threw up, had diarrhea and fainted in the same day, this time I
So we're supposedly having this BBQ on Canada Day. My dad is obsessed with entertaining, it's gonna be worse now because he bought a fancy new BBQ. Honestly, at this point, man...I seriously hate BBQ's, family events etc. Every time there is one I feel like I'm being tortured and forced to participate. At New Years I retreated to my room when I had enough, and at this upcoming event I'll do the same damn thing. idgaf anymore. Goddamn. I'm introverted, don't like huge groups, and that's that. Just feels like torture all the time.
Speaking of introverted...yeah I'm sort of taking an interest in psychology now. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with me and how to "fix" myself and make it through life. But yeah since I'm me I have to find out all the details. So I took out The Introvert Advantage, reading that has been like whoa, all the stories describe me perfectly. Took out a book about Highly Sensitive People, read the first chapter, found out that it's not really me. Took out a career counseling book surrounding Personality Type, and now I can't decide wheather I'm ISTJ or ISTP. Huge difference, and I have qualities in both J and P. So yeah that's sort of a roadblock right now. I'm just kind of assuming I"m ISTJ right now since I lean slightly more toward that side.
Anywhoozle...that's the end of my confusing update. See that's what happens when I don't write, I start sounding like a 7th grader being forced to write in a journal. Gonna go clean now.
Anyway this is what happened just now.:
Me: I've decided I'm gonna take out my hair. Final decision! (I have dreadlocks)
Mom: *disbelieving look* how are you gonna do that?
Me: You have to drench it in conditioner then use a thing to pick it out. I've done a lot of research--
Mom: Well just know you'll probably have to cut it all off.
Well first of all I don't give a shit if I have to cut it off, I just want my hair gone. It sucks when you look in the mirror every time and it's like, eew. My hair is all frizzy and messy and blah. I simply hate it at this point. Why should I hate my hair and deal with it, just because everyone fawns over it? If people want dreads they can get it on their own head, geez. But also, see, this is why I rarely say anything. Sigh...even a grunt of acknowledgement would be better. But whenever I say anything about what I'm feeling, what I want to do, etc., her answer feels (to me) like "what the hell are you doing, you're wrong, I'll tell you how to do it better" or "you can't do that at all". This is why I cut my hair shorter in the first place. I was gonna take it out then she was like nooo don't do that, here's what you should do instead. ARGHHHh. One day I'll just be like "bye guys, I'm moving out today" and they'll be like "what?" and they won't know anything because I will stop saying things out loud. LOL. No seriously, it's not cool.
Either way...I'm going to try to take my hair out. Hopefully I can find help, My mom is the worst hair person so I'm not going to depend on her at all. it's hard when you don't have friends and don't talk to your family that often. It'll be weird calling up my cousin or my aunt and saying "Hey there buddy ...I know I never call you, but do you wanna come over and help me take out my hair?"
Anyway...I don't know why I'm posting this, I was planning to delete my LJ for a bit, I've barely been on here lately because I've been doing other stuff. I spend my whole morning chained up with my dog, which is annoying but he can't be left to roam the house because he destroys things, so I have to sit with him until I'm pulling my hair out from watching too much TV. Plus soccer's on now (oops totally forgot to watch this morning). So that's the whole morning, then after that I usually watch Judge Pirro (only thing I actually enjoy watching), then I might go out and do some errands (usually only to the drugstore or library since I have nowhere else to go), then come back in time for the second soccer game, then clean the kitchen, by then it's like 3:00 already, and at that point I might get a bit of reading done or play the Sims for a few hours. So yeah basically no online time. Oh yeah, yesterday was puppy's 1st b'day :)
Anywho what else...well I've had this stomach illness for a few days now, it seems like the worst days are behind me but now my stomach won't stop growling. It never got as bad as the last time I had a stomach thing, where I threw up, had diarrhea and fainted in the same day, this time I
So we're supposedly having this BBQ on Canada Day. My dad is obsessed with entertaining, it's gonna be worse now because he bought a fancy new BBQ. Honestly, at this point, man...I seriously hate BBQ's, family events etc. Every time there is one I feel like I'm being tortured and forced to participate. At New Years I retreated to my room when I had enough, and at this upcoming event I'll do the same damn thing. idgaf anymore. Goddamn. I'm introverted, don't like huge groups, and that's that. Just feels like torture all the time.
Speaking of introverted...yeah I'm sort of taking an interest in psychology now. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with me and how to "fix" myself and make it through life. But yeah since I'm me I have to find out all the details. So I took out The Introvert Advantage, reading that has been like whoa, all the stories describe me perfectly. Took out a book about Highly Sensitive People, read the first chapter, found out that it's not really me. Took out a career counseling book surrounding Personality Type, and now I can't decide wheather I'm ISTJ or ISTP. Huge difference, and I have qualities in both J and P. So yeah that's sort of a roadblock right now. I'm just kind of assuming I"m ISTJ right now since I lean slightly more toward that side.
Anywhoozle...that's the end of my confusing update. See that's what happens when I don't write, I start sounding like a 7th grader being forced to write in a journal. Gonna go clean now.