I'm moving on up in the world
Hey i haven't written in here in forever. So, while Nick sleeps i'll update you all on anything i can. Nick and i are really strained right now and it SUCKS... like i just can't stop getting mad at him these days, because i feel like he's full of shit sometimes and so i call him on it and BOOM it turns into a fight. Where he denies the point even when i know i'm right. It's killing me because i've invested a lot of my time, money, mind, and heart into something...and sometimes i feel like he hasn't done ENOUGH at all. But another reason things are so stressful is because everything i thought was going to be happening as of Sept. 1 Didn't happen at all. I didn't pass praxis so i didn't get into the teaching program. I quit my job so i've been having to support myself and nick on my savings and checking account. That has stopped though my dear freinds because i'm fuckin sick of it. He doesn't have a job right now cause he doesn't have a car or a residence. And we got a house a nice freakln house in North Beach, with a rent tag of 1200 a month. That's a lot. So, now i'm struggling to find a new job and get any money coming in until i can get a new job so that when we move in October 1 i can cover my share of the rent. So, of course i'm really stressing out, and Nick well he just doesn't seemed that fazed by it, and i want to punch him in the face. I can honestly i DON'T love him right now, and if things don't get better soon i won't be DATING him either. Fuck him and his bullshit, don't treat the only thing that's ever been good for you badly because it's bad karma and you'll be all alone. I just wish when i vented about how i feel he'd say more and not become so defensive but he is a guy and that's what they do. I think if him and i can get through the next 3 weeks without killing each other, things will get better. We'll have a house, we'll both have jobs, and the things that are stressing me will lessen. Ok i'm outta here