Pink
"I wear pink because it makes me more in touch with my feminine side"
Right. Ok. So JUST as pink became fashionable, you decided you needed a feminine side? Thats a slight coincidental, don't you think? 50,000 blokes, all at near enough the same time, decided to acquire a feminine side? Surely, thats a phenomenon!? A miracle!
Well good for you! After all, masculinity wasn't working out. You spent £1,000 in Topman on witty T-shirts that said things such as 'Legend', 'Mad For It', 'Clart', 'Cunt', 'I'm such a prick', 'Badgers' etc, and you couldn't pull anyone, except for the one eyed girl who sat in the corner of Breeze?
Well it's a good job somebody said pink was cool. Pink was always a very gay colour, but the new breed of pink-wearers with fake tan and £60 haircuts from Toni and Guy really proved those queer bastards wrong!
I'm having trouble trying to grasp it to be honest. Anyone who knows me will know that I'm not the most 'hip kat' on the 'block', nor am I 'ghetto candy' or 'safe as fuck.'
How much pink do I need to acquire before I officially have a feminine side? Is it just a pink shirt? I caught on to the trend and went out and bought a pink leotard, and got laughed at. Can somebody give me some advice? I'm clearly not getting it!
Do I need the jeans too? The stylishly ripped ones that are six different shades of SHIT and look like you sat on a freshly painted white bench in a park when you were feeding the ducks with your girlfriend with the bread you stole from Iceland because you're also a bit rebellious? Or is it the Lonsdale trainers that are the real ice-breaker, that make women think I'm a boxer or have boxed when I'm actually a massive pussy who's only experience with boxes was when I was getting the fries out in McDonalds?
I just need clarity folks, that's all I'm asking for!
Again, pink seems to coincide with the eradication of poverty. It's a real fucking shame that those bands aren't pink. LET'S MAKE SOME! Or, y'know, just buy breast cancer bracelets. It's all good. Your intentions are there.
So. After researching this thoroughly, I need:
Stupid hair
Stupid shirt
Stupid trousers
Stupid shoes
Stupid face
Stupid attitude
Stupid bracelet
Great! I think I can get those from somewhere. Watch out, the street, Greg is coming and he's new and improved!
Right. Ok. So JUST as pink became fashionable, you decided you needed a feminine side? Thats a slight coincidental, don't you think? 50,000 blokes, all at near enough the same time, decided to acquire a feminine side? Surely, thats a phenomenon!? A miracle!
Well good for you! After all, masculinity wasn't working out. You spent £1,000 in Topman on witty T-shirts that said things such as 'Legend', 'Mad For It', 'Clart', 'Cunt', 'I'm such a prick', 'Badgers' etc, and you couldn't pull anyone, except for the one eyed girl who sat in the corner of Breeze?
Well it's a good job somebody said pink was cool. Pink was always a very gay colour, but the new breed of pink-wearers with fake tan and £60 haircuts from Toni and Guy really proved those queer bastards wrong!
I'm having trouble trying to grasp it to be honest. Anyone who knows me will know that I'm not the most 'hip kat' on the 'block', nor am I 'ghetto candy' or 'safe as fuck.'
How much pink do I need to acquire before I officially have a feminine side? Is it just a pink shirt? I caught on to the trend and went out and bought a pink leotard, and got laughed at. Can somebody give me some advice? I'm clearly not getting it!
Do I need the jeans too? The stylishly ripped ones that are six different shades of SHIT and look like you sat on a freshly painted white bench in a park when you were feeding the ducks with your girlfriend with the bread you stole from Iceland because you're also a bit rebellious? Or is it the Lonsdale trainers that are the real ice-breaker, that make women think I'm a boxer or have boxed when I'm actually a massive pussy who's only experience with boxes was when I was getting the fries out in McDonalds?
I just need clarity folks, that's all I'm asking for!
Again, pink seems to coincide with the eradication of poverty. It's a real fucking shame that those bands aren't pink. LET'S MAKE SOME! Or, y'know, just buy breast cancer bracelets. It's all good. Your intentions are there.
So. After researching this thoroughly, I need:
Stupid hair
Stupid shirt
Stupid trousers
Stupid shoes
Stupid face
Stupid attitude
Stupid bracelet
Great! I think I can get those from somewhere. Watch out, the street, Greg is coming and he's new and improved!