Jan 01, 2008 07:12
HAPPY NEW YEARS
Look back at all the failure
Look back at every time
you took 2 steps then 4 back
Look at how much you have lost and how little gained
Now look at the years before
Can't remember the good ones can you?
Neither can I
07 Gaining nothing, losing all gained in. 04,05,06
06 Going nowhere Gaining little
05 Giving everything just to go nowhere
04 Realizing its gonna look bad soon
Now for 08
which road?
Move away from it all
all the nothing and all the memories
Of horror and joy
work my way up so I can go to school
Or stay
Find more work
work my way up
go to school
and deal with the nothing and shit
until I can handle anything
Or crumble because I can't handle anymore.
I often think of how much more I can take
I often think of how easy it would be to give up
But in order for me to see what I can take I can't give up
So my only reason to live is to see how bad life can be
Fuck everything
Fuck everyone
Fuck me
Fuck the world
Fuck politics
Fuck religion
Fuck life
Fuck love
well ok I don't believe in "love"
But I do believe in love/respect/warmth/security
Only proofs of love
I don't have that
but the want for it
makes me want to stay alive
just the idea of stability
even false stability is still nice....
On that note why do I always get on LJ
when I'm suuuuuuper fucked up.
End Transmission .