Yoshitoki Kuninobu: {F6 to D5} Memories
And all he could remember, all that he could think about, breathe about was a name.
Noriko.
It was over. His chapter was finished without the storybook ending. Back to being another faceless, forgettable character, he backed himself up into the shadows again. The rain provided the perfect backdrop to the perfect misery scene - hell, his whole life was one great misery scene - and the mud, that was the icing to his heart as he misstepped and fell backwards into the drenched earth.
Too slow, too casual, too Yoshitoki. Her memories were slipping out of his hands now.
Noriko...?
Her eyes, her smile, the way her lips moved in a dance to frame her words. Her soothing voice. Her feminine, held-back laughter. Giggles, little titters of delightful sound. Never would have hurt a soul. Never did anything to deserve this. Out of every motherfucker on this island, why the hell did it have to be you?
Shit, shit, shiiitt!!!
Not fast enough, he had lost it all before he had anything to gain. Some hero. Some fucking hero you turned out to be, huh, Yoshitoki? And, he didn't know if it was the rain water making his eyes so blurry or his tears. Not man enough, not anything enough.
He should have been running out of the house. He should have been zooming around to find her, instead of sitting around like a coward (sitting around like yourself). He shouldn't have turned the corner of the house and frozen up. He should have been doing a million and one things. But Yoshitoki Kuninobu played it safe. He always did.
Fuck!! Maybe if he had kept on moving, maybe there would have been a chance. No, no, anyone would have stopped, right? Right? You can't blame me for not wanting to be killed. Kiriyama could have killed me, just like he had killed the others. Oh... He felt vomit tickling the back of his throat.
Everytime he closed his eyes, he saw it. Saw what had happened before the report, before the rainfall.
At the sound of the second gunshot, one sound not too far from the other, Yoshitoki had peeked over the corner of the house, just to see. Just to see if it was
and it wasn't her
It was something else entirely.
curiousity kills
Kiriyama took it. The fucker took the bullet in his arm and, and, you have to believe me...he's not human. In one graceful (graceful? Oh God) movement, he had thrown something and one went down on top of the other guy
corpse
and there was so much blood. Too much blood coming out of his neck. And, cold, fucking Kiriyama just started hacking away at them both. Took off their heads while Yoshitoki just
Stop it - stop it - I'm gonna be sick - stop, stop, stop -
It was without emotion, something like a mechanical machine doing its job. Zero hesitation. Zero questioning. Yoshi held his hands over his mouth, silencing his hysterical breathing.
Stop it - why are you doing this? Why, why, why? Please don't look over here - please - please, please!!
No matter how hard he thought, nothing stopped it. Every sound, every noise, every squeeze. It was methodical, every movement on its own rhythm. By the time Yoshitoki opened his eyes again, their heads were missing and Kiriyama was gone. It took a few delayed seconds for Yoshitoki to find solidity in his shaking legs so he could walk again.
"Oh my fucking God," Yoshi let the syllables out in a low breath. Keita Iijima - what the hell were you doing - and Mitsuru Numai, one of Kiriyama's goons.
Could've done something, Yoshi. Could've yelled, could've screamed. Could've made some sound to save them
and get myself killed, too? What good would that have been?! And you saw it. He got him in the neck. In the neck!! All the food he had left in him surged up and out, painting the green grass brown-orange.
I've still got to find Noriko. Noriko, Noriko... He got up on his knees, wiping the sick from his mouth with his worn sleeve. Everything was spinning. The sharp stench of death hung in the air, finding a constant, choking home in his nose. Okay, breathe, Yoshi, don't throw up again. And, like most things that he didn't want to happen, it happened. Over and over again, until the brown color turned to copper.
I've got to get up, got to get away. Got to find her before
before this happens to her, too.
Yoshitoki rose. The sky darkened gravely above him, threatening storm. It must've been midnight. He glanced at his watch. Report time.
Not now...!
"You've doubled your standard -" Sakamochi's voice thundered across the island in time with a flash of lightning. Four deaths, four deaths every report before the midnight hour. Four - the number representing death. Yoshi should've known, he should've seen it coming that on the fourth report -
Four names passed before:
"Boy #19 Shinji Mimura
Girl #15 Noriko Nakagawa"
Hope was lost. Everything he ever knew was lost.
Noriko.
And so here Yoshitoki Kuninobu was, sitting in the mud with buckets of water splashing over him.
Sitting here in the mud without you.
"Hey, Noriko, wait up!"
Yet another boring, useless day at Shiroiwa Junior High had come to a close. It must have been a beautiful day outside, nearly every blue sky had had more shades in it since Noriko had graced his sights. Blue sky, wait. If Noriko had heard that description, she would have shaken her head. Like she had said time and time again, colors weren't just colors. Their school uniform wasn't blue. It was a deep navy (if anyone but Noriko had said that, he would've argued that the color was more of a dark something or another and uniform - ha - what a word! It was more like prison garb but hey, it was Noriko, why argue with beauty?).
So, yeah. Pretty blue skies to match the color of her
think of a word, man, think of something - what was that phrase in one of those annoying songs.
chestnut eyes?
no, no, that sounds disgusting. chest nut eyes, I don't even wanna know.
beige?
ew, what? Her eyes aren't beige! Beige eyed girl...that's some freaky stuff.
chocolate?
are they that dark? No... Brown, yeah, but what kind of brown?
"Slow down, Noriko, wait!" Yoshitoki quickened his pace into a run, nearly colliding with Noriko when she stopped abruptly. "Hey, what's up?" He walked around her frozen figure, getting a good look at her face.
She had left the classroom at the end of the day in a hurry, clutching her notebook so tightly that it was making her knuckles turn white. Her face looked worried in a closed, ladylike way, the sort of face dignified ladies made to shield themselves when something was seriously wrong. If she had been any other Noriko than his Noriko, he probably wouldn't have caught the way her lips trembled just so, and would have glossed over all the details.
"Um, uh, something the matter?" The words came out squeaky, not at all smooth like they had sounded in his head.
"Oh, no, nothing's wrong," Noriko gave him a small smile. "Just trying to get home a little earlier, that's all."
"Mind if I walk you?" Yoshitoki offered. "I mean, it's no trouble at all for me. I remember from last time, your house isn't too far away from my place." C'mon, say the line. A pretty girl should
"Thank you, Nobu, but really, it's alright." As she turned to walk away, he stopped her, holding her by the shoulder. "Um..."
"Haven't you ever heard the saying?" A pretty girl should never "Y-you know...that one saying that they say and uh, yeah..."
"Nobu, would you mind taking your hand off of me?" Noriko shifted uncomfortably, stepping away and free from his hand. "Thank you."
"Aprettygirlshouldneverhavetowalkalone!" The smile on his face was as awkward as his wording. "Yeah, you know how people always say that, and you know, it's true, so, yeah, you shouldn't have to walk alone. Get it?"
She was looking over her shoulder anxiously, probably looking for an escape of some sort. Not that she was that rude or anything. No. Noriko was never rude. Always polite, always nice and quick to offer a helping hand to her friends, no matter what the cost. It was one of the most amazing things about her.
Auburn brown eyes...
No, that's not right, either. Auburn's a hair color and it's reddish, isn't it? Why does poetry have to be so hard?
It's not so hard for you, is it? You're poetry in motion.
"Thank you, I'm flattered." Her smile lessened, despite her words. "I really don't think so, but thanks." She started walking, moving as fast as her skirt would allow. Yoshi walked (more like jogged) right next to her to keep up. His mind was racing his heart to find the words to say to her, something that would amaze her and knock her off her feet and into his arms.
It had taken him months to be able to get her onto a friendly level at the very least, not like it was that difficult or anything, just that he had to play everything right. One mess-up, and you're gone. So far, things had been looking good. Most of the days that she spent afterschool writing, Yoshitoki was there. Yeah, sure, there were days when they said very little to one another. He kind of mumbled, she kind of nodded, and she wrote.
Page after page, it was like she were writing the great Japanese novel. Poem after poem. Song lyric after song lyric. I didn't even know she could sing, wow. Maybe I should learn some guitar or something and have her sing...yeah, that would be sweet. I remember she told me she loves listening to guitar playing. I could amaze her with a couple of chords, no sweat. Yoshitoki smiled warmly, remembering the time when he asked her where all her inspiration came from. Her answer? A boy. A very special, kind-hearted boy like no one else.
Yeah, Yoshi wasn't going to jinx it or anything by making assumptions. He still had a gut feeling, though. If nothing else, he was special and kind-hearted like no one else. Definitely. I mean, who else could there be?
"So, um, not like it's my business, but what's making you leave so fast? Whatever happened to staying behind to write or whatever?" He motioned to her notebook. "You're holding onto that thing like it's your last chance at life. You have tickets in there to America or something?" Bad joke; she wasn't laughing. And what did Yoshi know about America, anyway?
Noriko stopped right infront of the exit. "No." She had said it in a cold, odd way that didn't sound like her. Then, she kept on moving again, her hair bouncing slightly as she went.
"Hey, is something wrong? You can tell me." He wished he hadn't mentioned anything about that country, if that was bothering her, or anything.
"Nothing's wrong."
"Are you sure?" It must've been something else.
"I'm sure," They were walking outside now. Yoshitoki could smell the flowers blooming into colorful arrays. "I just want to get home early today, okay? You don't have to walk me, Nobu. It's okay, honestly." He glanced over at the ground. Were those daisies or tulips? Which ones were Noriko allergic to, again? She looked like she was holding back a sneeze.
"Okay. At least let me hold your book until we get there."
"No, Nobu." Noriko shook her head once slowly.
He held out his hands. "Seriously, it's the least I can do. We're friends, aren't we?"
"It's alright. I can carry it myself." Her lips twitched in dainty exasperation.
"You're hiding something." Nobu crossed his arms. "What're you hiding, Miss Nakagawa?"
Noriko stopped walking, closed her eyes, then sighed, dropping her arms to their sides. "Nothing. I'm just trying not to be late. I've got to help my brother with his homework and all. Family stuff, you know?"
"What happened to your shirt?"
"Oh, yeah..." She glanced down at the tear. It was a solid diagonal slash through the stomach area. Anyone could see that it wasn't an accidental rip. Before the words came out of her mouth, Yoshi knew who it must have been. "Hirono happened...but it's okay, I'm gonna go home and sew it up and it'll be fine. I do have two extra pairs of uniform, after all."
"Hirono?! That stupid bitch!" His face and tone twisted into a snarl. Rage seethed out of him in short, stilted breaths. How dare you, Shimizu? How fucking dare you? Wait 'til I find you and wring your neck.
"Hey, Yoshitoki!" Noriko bit her lip. "It's rude to call someone that."
"Look what she did to you." Yoshi's hands shook themselves into fists. "No one should be allowed to get away with that. Dumb, stupid bitch. Can't believe she would do something like that to you! You don't deserve it at all. Why aren't you mad? Why aren't you even upset with her or anything?"
"Well, it's not like she's a bad person or evil or anything. Hirono's just Hirono."
"She's a bitch. Her whole gang is a bunch of bitches. Mitsuko and Yoshimi and the rest of them." He had heard stories about Mitsuko and her girls. Everyone had. Those girls were notorious for stealing, violence, extreme humiliation, sex, and all kinds of other things. Supposedly, Mitsuko had once even stabbed a guy twice her size. They were insane, all three of them. Insane and in charge of most things around the school. It was crazy how many kids were afraid of them - and for good reason.
"There's a good side to everyone, Yoshitoki. Don't forget that. Nobody's totally evil, no matter how bad they may seem on the surface." Noriko covered the small slash with her hand. Fortunately, the cut had been shallow enough to only go through the fabric and not reach her skin. "Yoshimi's not so bad, atleast on her own. She can be really nice sometimes, especially since she's been going out with Yoji."
Yoji and Yoshimi. Yoshitoki rolled his eyes. They must have been the oddest couple, ever.
"And Hirono," Noriko went on. "I think it's all a tough act on the outside to keep people from messing with her. I'm sure she's not that bad once you get to know her. And Mitsuko, well, she's kind of the same way, I think. There's something about her that I feel like we're not getting the whole story on, you know?"
"What do you mean?"
"Like, have you ever read an old book missing a few pages or, like, a few pages were messed up or something, so you couldn't read them all the way?"
"I don't get it."
"It's kind of like that. Mitsuko's sort of a riddle missing a few things so you can't get the true answer. She's missing a couple of pages to her story, a few pages that we might never get to read. I don't think Mitsuko - well, the real Mitsuko Souma - is as mean and scary as we all think." She giggled softly into her hand. "See, I bet Mitsuko sleeps with a teddybear or something. Wouldn't that be funny? She's just like any other girl out there. Everybody's all afraid of her, but she's just like anyone else."
"Never thought of them that way." Yoshi whistled. "Guess you're right. How about Niida? Think he's just like any other guy?"
"Ew, okay." She laughed. "He's a definite pervert."
"Aha, so your ''nobody's really that bad'' theory doesn't work for everybody."
"I didn't say that. Niida has some traits that people might find interesting." Noriko shrugged. "I'm sure he's a nice guy once you get passed all the perverted stuff that he does and says sometimes. I don't know that much about him personally... Hey, I know you're going to ask about Kuronaga next or something. Don't even. I don't know him or the rest of his friends that well. All I'm saying is that no one is as horrible as you think they are, okay? Everybody's got something that people like about them."
Everybody's got something, Yoshi thought lamely. Wonder what I've got. He didn't bother to ask.
"Hey, um, N-Noriko, anybody ever tell you that you've got great eyes? They're so beautiful and...
brown." Brown? That's all you're going to say? What happened to impressing her with some pretentious, artsy adjective?
"Thanks. I mean it." Noriko looked down at her shirt again. "I should really get home now. It's kind of embarassing; I thought the hole was a lot smaller than how it really is, wow. Good thing I'm wearing layers today." She started walking, then stopped suddenly in her tracks. "Um, Yoshitoki, wanna walk me home? Sorry for being so rude about everything earlier, I just didn't want anyone noticing the rip or anything, haha." Nervous laughter. The best kind.
"It's okay. Don't worry about it, no one's gonna notice a thing as long as you keep smiling," Yoshi grinned. "And, of course, I'll walk you home. Walking you home is awesome, yeah. I'm...I'm here for you, no matter what, Noriko. Always."
Always. Always always has to come with an expiration date. Every good dream had its reality check ending, one big slap in the face or gunshot to the head or knife in the neck. His stomach heaved again. Not just for the bodies, but for the life he wasn't going to get back. All those memories, every happy thought shattered.
"Noriko, no."
Things weren't supposed to happen this way. He was supposed to be able to find her. He was supposed to be able to tell her everything was going to be okay. He was going to hold her
pull her close
kiss her
and sleep with her safe in his arms. That was the fairy tale ending. He was going to save her and everything would be alright because they were together and he would finally be able to tell her the words he had never been able to say. The word that ruins everything. The word better left felt, not spoken. Yoshitoki was going to tell her he
to tell her he
I can't say it
to tell her he loved her.
A pretty girl should never have to walk alone. How could he have been so fucking stupid? She walked alone
no, look on the bright side, maybe she wasn't alone, maybe
shut the hell up, you know what happened to her
A pretty girl walked alone and got killed.
Here for you no matter what. I wasn't there when you needed me the most. I couldn't save you when it counted. Noriko...!
I wasn't good enough for you. Is this supposed to be their way of saying I wasn't good enough for you? The ultimate test. Strapped around his wrist, he could feel the weight of the wiimote. With shaking hands, he had checked the bodies for any useful weapons and obviously, they came up short. Kiriyama must have taken everything - their collars, too. Decapitated cadavers without collars, freed from their leash in death.
And now you're free, too, you're free without me.
I failed. I'm not special.
I'm not special.
I'm absolutely nothing.
A crowd of kids surround another.
He's playing a soft, gentle tune.
They're listening, they're clapping along to a steady one, two, three, four.
Meanwhile, there's a boy standing there, not worth more than the floor.
He sticks to the wall,
says words that go unheard,
and watches the one who has it all
play a soft, gentle tune.
"Wow, Nobu, you wrote this yourself?"
"It's not that great." He sighed. "It's missing something, isn't it?"
"Yeah," Noriko agreed, tapping the desk thoughtfully. "Maybe, a happy ending?"
"No, that would kind of ruin the flow of things, don't you think?" Yoshi folded the piece of paper back up. They were sharing a desk during break time. He was on one side, and she was on the other. "I mean, to suddenly slap in a happy ending...I don't know about that. It doesn't fit the story. You're the one who hates it when writers force and choke things into their stories."
"Mm, yeah, you're right. Hey, um, I have to go meet up with a friend this break time."
"Again? You did that last Monday, too, and the Monday before that." He smirked. "Seeing anyone special?"
"Kind of." Her voice had an obvious cheery note to it.
"Well, go ahead, wouldn't want to keep you waiting." Yoshi teased.
"Okay, see you later!" She left, waving her hand.
Yeah, it kind of bothered him how they were spending less and less free breaks together, but whatever. It was cool. Things seemed like they were finally looking up for him. He was so, so close to finally being able to tell her. Soon enough, even, he'd be able to break off from the wall and into the sunset, together with her by his side.
That was the happy ending that was missing from the poem. The boy against a wall needed to find his girl, a girl that had something that no one else had, so he could be the boy who had something special and that something special was her. Nobody else, only her. It was the kind of special thing that would make everyone jealous, something better than any relationship in their school.
Yoshitoki smiled to himself.
I'll tell her when the time is right. I'll tell her for sure. He had already told Shuuya a few weeks back about her. Telling him had been hard enough. Why, he didn't know. Probably too afraid to ruin things by saying them out in the air. That's why it's only "kind of liking" her. You can't say the truth out loud. Things get messed up that way. Once you say those three simple words, everything gets screwed up.
I should tell her next week. But, no, wait. Bad idea. I've arleady got a good thing going. Why mess it up now? I should keep things as they are. She tells me a whole lot of stuff, after all. Quiet girl in class, but she's not that quiet. It's like she's got this refined sense of loudness or something. Noriko's so cool - she's not afraid to call anybody by their first name. Cute.
Sure, she's not as much of a leader as Yukie is. Sure, she's not as outwardly smart as Satomi or Motobuchi. Maybe, she's not as athletic as Takako. Who cares about that stuff? She's got so much more to offer than all of that other stuff. Nori's perfect the way she is. I wouldn't want her to be anyone than who she already is.
If he were any better at writing, he'd spend all day writing stories about her. He'd write about her hair, her mouth, her eyes; every single
okay, that's enough, Yoshi. You're getting way too sappy here. Do something, stop sitting around and thinking! Go out and find her and tell her. You can be special for her.
"Yes." He mouthed the word. He could do this. It wasn't like he had anybody in the way. Every poem she wrote about that mysterious boy traced back to him. Great hair (Yoshitoki tried), nice eyes (eh, his eyes weren't all that nice, but he would take any compliment he could get), and a gorgeous smile that made her feel important (that was the biggest clue). It was obvious. She had some sort of feeling. Everything he had been doing was working. He had some sort of chance. And maybe, that chance was today.
Of course, he had been feeling this same way a couple days ago, too, but - but that was totally a trial run. He didn't have to say anything during the trial run.
He walked out into the hallway, ready to write the happy ending to his poem. No, more than write. Co-write. It was her happy ending, too. Yeah, just you and
Shuuya? Since when did you talk to Shuuya without me around?
Since when did your face look like that at a guy? Since when did your eyes start looking like that? Your eyes. Your face is flushing. You're staring. You're staring at him and he's staring at you and you're both staring at eachother and here I am standing here staring at you staring at him and - damnit!
"Ahahaha..." If he hadn't laughed, he might have cried. "Break time's almost over, Shuu, let's get back to class."
How could he have been so fucking clueless? Noriko Nakagawa and Shuuya Nanahara. Should've seen it coming from a mile away. Should've seen it coming before it ran him over. I can't breathe. Pressure, pressure pushing his lungs down.
"Of course. Of course, Yoshitoki," Noriko said with a slight bow of her head. Sweet words. "I'll see the both of you later- thank you very much for today, Shuuya." Sweet words scribing daggers in his chest. One last look at the musician and she was gone, disappearing into a crowd of girls far off in the hallway.
-
"Hey, um, I have to go meet up with a friend this break time."
"Again? You did that last Monday, too, and the Monday before that." He smirked. "Seeing anyone special?"
"Kind of." Her voice had an obvious cheery note to it.
-
It was Shuuya, wasn't it, Noriko?
-
I remember she told me she loves listening to guitar playing.
she loves
listening to guitar playing.
I could amaze her with a couple of chords, no sweat. Yoshitoki smiled warmly, remembering the time when he asked her where all her inspiration came from. Her answer? A boy. A very special, kind-hearted boy like no one else.
-
The clues were all there, right in front of me.
-
"Hey, how's Shuuya doing with -- you know, the music and stuff?" Something about the way she said his name made his skin itch. "He's...really cool, don't you think?"
"Oh, that loser?" Yoshi joked. "Me 'n' him go way back. I taught him how to tie his shoes." He was walking Noriko home, as usual. It was starting to become their thing-to-do now. "I'm kidding when I call him a loser. We're best friends." It felt weird saying that. It sounded too girly. "I guess you could say we grew up together."
"So, you know everything about him?"
"Not much to know other than he's pretty stupid once you get to know him."
"Hey, you shouldn't say that about him, friends or not." Noriko's stern face was enough to make him stop the insults.
"You should know him already, anyway. You and him talk."
"Yeah, with you around. I just...I just wish I had something for him."
Yoshitoki didn't even hear what Shuuya had said. "Thought you weren't looking for a girlfriend?" This kid...Shuu was actually stealing her away. Thought you were still into that fat girl. Thought you weren't going to take Noriko. He didn't look his friend in the eye. All he could make complete eye contact with was the wall behind Shuu, right over his shoulder. Shiney, almost laminate walls distorted his reflection back at him.
What's wrong with me?
"Whoa, wait- what? Where'd that come from? You feeling okay? I didn't mean to-" Look at you, you act like you're so confused. Perfect. You forgot, didn't you? How fucking convenient. "...Oh. Oh, man. Hold on."
"Something for him? What do you mean by that?" He expertly raised an eyebrow at her.
"What I mean is - is that we have nothing in common. Shuuya's just so Shuuya and I'm so me." Noriko sighed. "I want to be friends with him, you know, but it's like we're in two different worlds."
"Wait a minute now, what makes him so much better than you?"
"Shuuya's a rockstar, Nobu."
And you're my star. That should be good enough for you. "Is this seriously bringing you down this much?" He laughed. "Shuuya's friends with everyone. It's not that hard to talk to him. You do it all the time."
"Only when you're there." Noriko looked frustrated, like she wasn't getting her message through to him. "I need something that we have in common other than just you. Shuuya seems like such a nice guy and I want to be able to say things to him instead of just hi or laughing when you make jokes with him. Do you understand what I'm saying, Yoshitoki? Help me out here, you're my friend."
"Okay, okay. It's simple, really. I know the perfect way for you two to start talking more." Yoshi beamed. It was a genius plan. "You know how he's into music, right?"
"Y-yeah! Of course!"
"And a lot of music has lyrics, right?"
"Right, right."
"And lyrics are just words strung together, kind of like poems, right?"
"Oh! Yoshitoki, you're the best." She was smiling wider than he was. "I don't know what I would do without you. Thank you so, so much."
"Don't mention it."
-
"I'm not interested in her at all. You know that. And she doesn't like me." Shuuya went on. Yoshi was too caught up in his thoughts to pay full attention. She doesn't like you, you sure about that? She begged me to help her talk to you and this is the thanks that I get for it. I told you I liked her and look how much it's working for us. "...You okay, Yoshi? You're sure you don't want me to put in a good word?"
...
What?
Something snapped. "I don't-" What the hell was he saying? What the hell did he mean by a good word? It was like, it was almost as if he was saying he couldn't get her without one. Is that what you're saying? "A good word! I don't need you to put in a good word for me, thank you very much. We might not all have rock star charm, but-"
"Shuuya's a rockstar, Nobu."
. . .very special...like no one else.
Babbling. Shuuya was babbling a response now, full of all kinds of sorries. "Noriko... I hardly see her. And I mean see her. I don't really see her face. It's blurry to me. Not the way that I saw Kazumi's." Whatever, whatever. I don't get what Noriko sees in you that she can't find in me. For fuck's sake, Shuu, I told you about her.
"It's not..." It's not like I've got anything for her. "S'not... s'not like..." you can't get anybody you want. You can. So why not leave Noriko alone? He let out a long, weighty breath of air, unsure of what to say next. "...Sorry I snapped, Shuu. I've been having a weird morning. Lack of sleep." Lie.
Another apology. Another reason for Yoshi not to care. Why bother?
"Look, you're going to get her. I know it. And if you think she's got eyes for anybody but you, you're wrong. You're great, Yoshi. She likes you. Any girl would." Good one.
"You say so," Yoshi said, touching a piece of his hair. Great hair, yeah, right. What a dream. I can't even grow it that long without it looking stupid. "Class time, Shuu. Let's focus." He turned away.
"Yeah...Yeah, of course. Just... let's talk about this later, okay? If you need to talk, that is."
"Sure."
No.
Hope had died with Shinji and Noriko. Mimura, out of anyone on the island, could come up with a plan to get them out of this mess. Escape, yeah, right. Look what happened. Yeah, to some level, Yoshitoki could come up with the ideas. He could think of things to do - he already had.
He vaguely remembered some of the technical tricks Mr. Abe had taught him when he was younger - lame, useless computer tricks that could only come in handy if he had a laptop. Oh, and machinery stuff that had kept him awake at night, trying to figure out the mechanics that went into things like cars and dishwashers. Yoshi had been eleven at that time, if he remembered right. Too young to grasp the overall concepts he was being taught, but he had been smart enough to pull enough details together to get somewhere.
Well, somewhere, that is, if your version of somewhere was nowhere at all. Yoshitoki was better at coming up with reasons for ideas not to work. It came with the cynical territory. Oh, shit, oh, shit. Everything was wrong now. His chest hurt all over again. There was nothing left for him to throw up, so he was left rolling around, hiccuping uncontrollably.
I'm out. They're going to kill me, Noriko. There's no one left. No one left.
Why doesn't anybody like me?
You didn't even like me. Everybody left me. Me, me, me. I'm not good enough for anyone.
Six hours went by with him staring up at the sky turning from dark to light, absolutely soaked. There weren't any names on the report. Twenty two people left. Twenty one people to die before he could go home. Home? What home? Twenty one before he could hang out with Ms. Anno again. Twenty one before he could play with all the little kids, sing stupid songs, play a little game of catch. Twenty one. Twenty one.
"Twenty one." By the looks of it, he wouldn't even live to be twenty one. Kids could drink then, right? That was the time when you're supposed to be an adult. "Less than forty eight hours." The dawn rays washed over him, giving him a slight headache. "We'll all die at the next midnight if...if nothing happens." He mumbled, echoing Sakamochi's report.
Yoshitoki Kuninobu didn't want to die. Who did? Time passed by without him getting up. One more death. Fumiyo Fujiyoshi, that nurse girl. Not enough of a personality to remember. Oh, what time was it? Noon. The beginning of the end.
I don't want to be a loser.
I don't want to die as some un-special person.
I can't go this way. I don't want to die like that...
He glanced over at Mitsuru and Keita's unrecognizable bodies. They were drying out in the sun, long forgotten by their peers. Noriko's name had been before theirs on the report, meaning that, maybe if Yoshi had gotten out of the house faster, he could've -
I could have saved you.
If I had been better... I could have saved you.
Now it's me by myself!
(all alone alone ain't this familiar)
The only one that's gonna be disappointed in the end will be me.
Don't want to die a loser.
I don't want everyone to forget about me.
very special...like no one else
No matter what, Noriko.
"...but if you die now, you're still just a loser."
not enough personality
got him in the neck - in the neck!!!
21 students remaining. Half way there. 36 hours left.
we'll find a way, our way.
so scared...
If they're not killing fast enough then that means I have to kill.
Kill to win.If I have to kill, then I have to play.
If I wanna go home, I'll have to play.
play play play
kill kill kill
It's me versus them.
I'm not evil. I'm not a bad guy. This makes perfect sense.
I just wanna go home.
I just wanna be special.
I can't die a loser.
I can't die before I'm supposed to.
Noriko, I needed you. I needed you, I needed you.
I have to play if I wanna live.
It makes sense, doesn't it?
He was walking now, swarmed by all his thoughts. He had to do it. He had to play. There weren't any other options. Escape? Impossible. Their last chances had all died. Mimura was dead. Sugimura was dead. Noriko was dead. Hope died. There wasn't any way off the island. Staying in the house back at F6 was aa death trap. Look, don't blame me. It's a total damned-if-you-do-damned-if-you-don't thing.
If I don't kill, I'll die.
If I do kill, I'm -
well. . . Shit, I'm crying. Why am I crying? Why can't I stop crying?
There were kids lying under a tree not too far from him. He had reached D5 and he could see their faces, but not their names. Breathed in the air. The smell of blood had never left him. It probably never would, much like the noises the guns made when they fired. He closed his eyes for a moment, to let everything sink in.
"I want to be like no one else," He murmured, backing up. Yoshitoki shook all the memories of them out of his head. Only numbers. No names. "No one's going to forget me." He raised up his arm, hoping, praying that neither of them would wake.
As his arm traced a solid arc, he let the wiimote go. It flew through the air...
And all he would make them remember, all that he would make them think about, breathe about was a name.
"Nobu!"
((OOC: Yoshitoki Kuninobu throws the wiimote at Toshinori Oda. Does he kill, wound, or miss him? No hard feelings! Wait for mod post to vote. The flashback sequence with Shuu and Yoshi talking was from an already posted Shuu post - this is just Yoshi's side of it, so it should be fine PC approval-wise. The mentionings of Kiriyama at the top part of the post also happened in a Kiriyama post, so it, too, should be fine. :D Thanks.))
Noriko.
It was over. His chapter was finished without the storybook ending. Back to being another faceless, forgettable character, he backed himself up into the shadows again. The rain provided the perfect backdrop to the perfect misery scene - hell, his whole life was one great misery scene - and the mud, that was the icing to his heart as he misstepped and fell backwards into the drenched earth.
Too slow, too casual, too Yoshitoki. Her memories were slipping out of his hands now.
Noriko...?
Her eyes, her smile, the way her lips moved in a dance to frame her words. Her soothing voice. Her feminine, held-back laughter. Giggles, little titters of delightful sound. Never would have hurt a soul. Never did anything to deserve this. Out of every motherfucker on this island, why the hell did it have to be you?
Shit, shit, shiiitt!!!
Not fast enough, he had lost it all before he had anything to gain. Some hero. Some fucking hero you turned out to be, huh, Yoshitoki? And, he didn't know if it was the rain water making his eyes so blurry or his tears. Not man enough, not anything enough.
He should have been running out of the house. He should have been zooming around to find her, instead of sitting around like a coward (sitting around like yourself). He shouldn't have turned the corner of the house and frozen up. He should have been doing a million and one things. But Yoshitoki Kuninobu played it safe. He always did.
Fuck!! Maybe if he had kept on moving, maybe there would have been a chance. No, no, anyone would have stopped, right? Right? You can't blame me for not wanting to be killed. Kiriyama could have killed me, just like he had killed the others. Oh... He felt vomit tickling the back of his throat.
Everytime he closed his eyes, he saw it. Saw what had happened before the report, before the rainfall.
At the sound of the second gunshot, one sound not too far from the other, Yoshitoki had peeked over the corner of the house, just to see. Just to see if it was
and it wasn't her
It was something else entirely.
curiousity kills
Kiriyama took it. The fucker took the bullet in his arm and, and, you have to believe me...he's not human. In one graceful (graceful? Oh God) movement, he had thrown something and one went down on top of the other guy
corpse
and there was so much blood. Too much blood coming out of his neck. And, cold, fucking Kiriyama just started hacking away at them both. Took off their heads while Yoshitoki just
Stop it - stop it - I'm gonna be sick - stop, stop, stop -
It was without emotion, something like a mechanical machine doing its job. Zero hesitation. Zero questioning. Yoshi held his hands over his mouth, silencing his hysterical breathing.
Stop it - why are you doing this? Why, why, why? Please don't look over here - please - please, please!!
No matter how hard he thought, nothing stopped it. Every sound, every noise, every squeeze. It was methodical, every movement on its own rhythm. By the time Yoshitoki opened his eyes again, their heads were missing and Kiriyama was gone. It took a few delayed seconds for Yoshitoki to find solidity in his shaking legs so he could walk again.
"Oh my fucking God," Yoshi let the syllables out in a low breath. Keita Iijima - what the hell were you doing - and Mitsuru Numai, one of Kiriyama's goons.
Could've done something, Yoshi. Could've yelled, could've screamed. Could've made some sound to save them
and get myself killed, too? What good would that have been?! And you saw it. He got him in the neck. In the neck!! All the food he had left in him surged up and out, painting the green grass brown-orange.
I've still got to find Noriko. Noriko, Noriko... He got up on his knees, wiping the sick from his mouth with his worn sleeve. Everything was spinning. The sharp stench of death hung in the air, finding a constant, choking home in his nose. Okay, breathe, Yoshi, don't throw up again. And, like most things that he didn't want to happen, it happened. Over and over again, until the brown color turned to copper.
I've got to get up, got to get away. Got to find her before
before this happens to her, too.
Yoshitoki rose. The sky darkened gravely above him, threatening storm. It must've been midnight. He glanced at his watch. Report time.
Not now...!
"You've doubled your standard -" Sakamochi's voice thundered across the island in time with a flash of lightning. Four deaths, four deaths every report before the midnight hour. Four - the number representing death. Yoshi should've known, he should've seen it coming that on the fourth report -
Four names passed before:
"Boy #19 Shinji Mimura
Girl #15 Noriko Nakagawa"
Hope was lost. Everything he ever knew was lost.
Noriko.
And so here Yoshitoki Kuninobu was, sitting in the mud with buckets of water splashing over him.
Sitting here in the mud without you.
"Hey, Noriko, wait up!"
Yet another boring, useless day at Shiroiwa Junior High had come to a close. It must have been a beautiful day outside, nearly every blue sky had had more shades in it since Noriko had graced his sights. Blue sky, wait. If Noriko had heard that description, she would have shaken her head. Like she had said time and time again, colors weren't just colors. Their school uniform wasn't blue. It was a deep navy (if anyone but Noriko had said that, he would've argued that the color was more of a dark something or another and uniform - ha - what a word! It was more like prison garb but hey, it was Noriko, why argue with beauty?).
So, yeah. Pretty blue skies to match the color of her
think of a word, man, think of something - what was that phrase in one of those annoying songs.
chestnut eyes?
no, no, that sounds disgusting. chest nut eyes, I don't even wanna know.
beige?
ew, what? Her eyes aren't beige! Beige eyed girl...that's some freaky stuff.
chocolate?
are they that dark? No... Brown, yeah, but what kind of brown?
"Slow down, Noriko, wait!" Yoshitoki quickened his pace into a run, nearly colliding with Noriko when she stopped abruptly. "Hey, what's up?" He walked around her frozen figure, getting a good look at her face.
She had left the classroom at the end of the day in a hurry, clutching her notebook so tightly that it was making her knuckles turn white. Her face looked worried in a closed, ladylike way, the sort of face dignified ladies made to shield themselves when something was seriously wrong. If she had been any other Noriko than his Noriko, he probably wouldn't have caught the way her lips trembled just so, and would have glossed over all the details.
"Um, uh, something the matter?" The words came out squeaky, not at all smooth like they had sounded in his head.
"Oh, no, nothing's wrong," Noriko gave him a small smile. "Just trying to get home a little earlier, that's all."
"Mind if I walk you?" Yoshitoki offered. "I mean, it's no trouble at all for me. I remember from last time, your house isn't too far away from my place." C'mon, say the line. A pretty girl should
"Thank you, Nobu, but really, it's alright." As she turned to walk away, he stopped her, holding her by the shoulder. "Um..."
"Haven't you ever heard the saying?" A pretty girl should never "Y-you know...that one saying that they say and uh, yeah..."
"Nobu, would you mind taking your hand off of me?" Noriko shifted uncomfortably, stepping away and free from his hand. "Thank you."
"Aprettygirlshouldneverhavetowalkalone!" The smile on his face was as awkward as his wording. "Yeah, you know how people always say that, and you know, it's true, so, yeah, you shouldn't have to walk alone. Get it?"
She was looking over her shoulder anxiously, probably looking for an escape of some sort. Not that she was that rude or anything. No. Noriko was never rude. Always polite, always nice and quick to offer a helping hand to her friends, no matter what the cost. It was one of the most amazing things about her.
Auburn brown eyes...
No, that's not right, either. Auburn's a hair color and it's reddish, isn't it? Why does poetry have to be so hard?
It's not so hard for you, is it? You're poetry in motion.
"Thank you, I'm flattered." Her smile lessened, despite her words. "I really don't think so, but thanks." She started walking, moving as fast as her skirt would allow. Yoshi walked (more like jogged) right next to her to keep up. His mind was racing his heart to find the words to say to her, something that would amaze her and knock her off her feet and into his arms.
It had taken him months to be able to get her onto a friendly level at the very least, not like it was that difficult or anything, just that he had to play everything right. One mess-up, and you're gone. So far, things had been looking good. Most of the days that she spent afterschool writing, Yoshitoki was there. Yeah, sure, there were days when they said very little to one another. He kind of mumbled, she kind of nodded, and she wrote.
Page after page, it was like she were writing the great Japanese novel. Poem after poem. Song lyric after song lyric. I didn't even know she could sing, wow. Maybe I should learn some guitar or something and have her sing...yeah, that would be sweet. I remember she told me she loves listening to guitar playing. I could amaze her with a couple of chords, no sweat. Yoshitoki smiled warmly, remembering the time when he asked her where all her inspiration came from. Her answer? A boy. A very special, kind-hearted boy like no one else.
Yeah, Yoshi wasn't going to jinx it or anything by making assumptions. He still had a gut feeling, though. If nothing else, he was special and kind-hearted like no one else. Definitely. I mean, who else could there be?
"So, um, not like it's my business, but what's making you leave so fast? Whatever happened to staying behind to write or whatever?" He motioned to her notebook. "You're holding onto that thing like it's your last chance at life. You have tickets in there to America or something?" Bad joke; she wasn't laughing. And what did Yoshi know about America, anyway?
Noriko stopped right infront of the exit. "No." She had said it in a cold, odd way that didn't sound like her. Then, she kept on moving again, her hair bouncing slightly as she went.
"Hey, is something wrong? You can tell me." He wished he hadn't mentioned anything about that country, if that was bothering her, or anything.
"Nothing's wrong."
"Are you sure?" It must've been something else.
"I'm sure," They were walking outside now. Yoshitoki could smell the flowers blooming into colorful arrays. "I just want to get home early today, okay? You don't have to walk me, Nobu. It's okay, honestly." He glanced over at the ground. Were those daisies or tulips? Which ones were Noriko allergic to, again? She looked like she was holding back a sneeze.
"Okay. At least let me hold your book until we get there."
"No, Nobu." Noriko shook her head once slowly.
He held out his hands. "Seriously, it's the least I can do. We're friends, aren't we?"
"It's alright. I can carry it myself." Her lips twitched in dainty exasperation.
"You're hiding something." Nobu crossed his arms. "What're you hiding, Miss Nakagawa?"
Noriko stopped walking, closed her eyes, then sighed, dropping her arms to their sides. "Nothing. I'm just trying not to be late. I've got to help my brother with his homework and all. Family stuff, you know?"
"What happened to your shirt?"
"Oh, yeah..." She glanced down at the tear. It was a solid diagonal slash through the stomach area. Anyone could see that it wasn't an accidental rip. Before the words came out of her mouth, Yoshi knew who it must have been. "Hirono happened...but it's okay, I'm gonna go home and sew it up and it'll be fine. I do have two extra pairs of uniform, after all."
"Hirono?! That stupid bitch!" His face and tone twisted into a snarl. Rage seethed out of him in short, stilted breaths. How dare you, Shimizu? How fucking dare you? Wait 'til I find you and wring your neck.
"Hey, Yoshitoki!" Noriko bit her lip. "It's rude to call someone that."
"Look what she did to you." Yoshi's hands shook themselves into fists. "No one should be allowed to get away with that. Dumb, stupid bitch. Can't believe she would do something like that to you! You don't deserve it at all. Why aren't you mad? Why aren't you even upset with her or anything?"
"Well, it's not like she's a bad person or evil or anything. Hirono's just Hirono."
"She's a bitch. Her whole gang is a bunch of bitches. Mitsuko and Yoshimi and the rest of them." He had heard stories about Mitsuko and her girls. Everyone had. Those girls were notorious for stealing, violence, extreme humiliation, sex, and all kinds of other things. Supposedly, Mitsuko had once even stabbed a guy twice her size. They were insane, all three of them. Insane and in charge of most things around the school. It was crazy how many kids were afraid of them - and for good reason.
"There's a good side to everyone, Yoshitoki. Don't forget that. Nobody's totally evil, no matter how bad they may seem on the surface." Noriko covered the small slash with her hand. Fortunately, the cut had been shallow enough to only go through the fabric and not reach her skin. "Yoshimi's not so bad, atleast on her own. She can be really nice sometimes, especially since she's been going out with Yoji."
Yoji and Yoshimi. Yoshitoki rolled his eyes. They must have been the oddest couple, ever.
"And Hirono," Noriko went on. "I think it's all a tough act on the outside to keep people from messing with her. I'm sure she's not that bad once you get to know her. And Mitsuko, well, she's kind of the same way, I think. There's something about her that I feel like we're not getting the whole story on, you know?"
"What do you mean?"
"Like, have you ever read an old book missing a few pages or, like, a few pages were messed up or something, so you couldn't read them all the way?"
"I don't get it."
"It's kind of like that. Mitsuko's sort of a riddle missing a few things so you can't get the true answer. She's missing a couple of pages to her story, a few pages that we might never get to read. I don't think Mitsuko - well, the real Mitsuko Souma - is as mean and scary as we all think." She giggled softly into her hand. "See, I bet Mitsuko sleeps with a teddybear or something. Wouldn't that be funny? She's just like any other girl out there. Everybody's all afraid of her, but she's just like anyone else."
"Never thought of them that way." Yoshi whistled. "Guess you're right. How about Niida? Think he's just like any other guy?"
"Ew, okay." She laughed. "He's a definite pervert."
"Aha, so your ''nobody's really that bad'' theory doesn't work for everybody."
"I didn't say that. Niida has some traits that people might find interesting." Noriko shrugged. "I'm sure he's a nice guy once you get passed all the perverted stuff that he does and says sometimes. I don't know that much about him personally... Hey, I know you're going to ask about Kuronaga next or something. Don't even. I don't know him or the rest of his friends that well. All I'm saying is that no one is as horrible as you think they are, okay? Everybody's got something that people like about them."
Everybody's got something, Yoshi thought lamely. Wonder what I've got. He didn't bother to ask.
"Hey, um, N-Noriko, anybody ever tell you that you've got great eyes? They're so beautiful and...
brown." Brown? That's all you're going to say? What happened to impressing her with some pretentious, artsy adjective?
"Thanks. I mean it." Noriko looked down at her shirt again. "I should really get home now. It's kind of embarassing; I thought the hole was a lot smaller than how it really is, wow. Good thing I'm wearing layers today." She started walking, then stopped suddenly in her tracks. "Um, Yoshitoki, wanna walk me home? Sorry for being so rude about everything earlier, I just didn't want anyone noticing the rip or anything, haha." Nervous laughter. The best kind.
"It's okay. Don't worry about it, no one's gonna notice a thing as long as you keep smiling," Yoshi grinned. "And, of course, I'll walk you home. Walking you home is awesome, yeah. I'm...I'm here for you, no matter what, Noriko. Always."
Always. Always always has to come with an expiration date. Every good dream had its reality check ending, one big slap in the face or gunshot to the head or knife in the neck. His stomach heaved again. Not just for the bodies, but for the life he wasn't going to get back. All those memories, every happy thought shattered.
"Noriko, no."
Things weren't supposed to happen this way. He was supposed to be able to find her. He was supposed to be able to tell her everything was going to be okay. He was going to hold her
pull her close
kiss her
and sleep with her safe in his arms. That was the fairy tale ending. He was going to save her and everything would be alright because they were together and he would finally be able to tell her the words he had never been able to say. The word that ruins everything. The word better left felt, not spoken. Yoshitoki was going to tell her he
to tell her he
I can't say it
to tell her he loved her.
A pretty girl should never have to walk alone. How could he have been so fucking stupid? She walked alone
no, look on the bright side, maybe she wasn't alone, maybe
shut the hell up, you know what happened to her
A pretty girl walked alone and got killed.
Here for you no matter what. I wasn't there when you needed me the most. I couldn't save you when it counted. Noriko...!
I wasn't good enough for you. Is this supposed to be their way of saying I wasn't good enough for you? The ultimate test. Strapped around his wrist, he could feel the weight of the wiimote. With shaking hands, he had checked the bodies for any useful weapons and obviously, they came up short. Kiriyama must have taken everything - their collars, too. Decapitated cadavers without collars, freed from their leash in death.
And now you're free, too, you're free without me.
I failed. I'm not special.
I'm not special.
I'm absolutely nothing.
A crowd of kids surround another.
He's playing a soft, gentle tune.
They're listening, they're clapping along to a steady one, two, three, four.
Meanwhile, there's a boy standing there, not worth more than the floor.
He sticks to the wall,
says words that go unheard,
and watches the one who has it all
play a soft, gentle tune.
"Wow, Nobu, you wrote this yourself?"
"It's not that great." He sighed. "It's missing something, isn't it?"
"Yeah," Noriko agreed, tapping the desk thoughtfully. "Maybe, a happy ending?"
"No, that would kind of ruin the flow of things, don't you think?" Yoshi folded the piece of paper back up. They were sharing a desk during break time. He was on one side, and she was on the other. "I mean, to suddenly slap in a happy ending...I don't know about that. It doesn't fit the story. You're the one who hates it when writers force and choke things into their stories."
"Mm, yeah, you're right. Hey, um, I have to go meet up with a friend this break time."
"Again? You did that last Monday, too, and the Monday before that." He smirked. "Seeing anyone special?"
"Kind of." Her voice had an obvious cheery note to it.
"Well, go ahead, wouldn't want to keep you waiting." Yoshi teased.
"Okay, see you later!" She left, waving her hand.
Yeah, it kind of bothered him how they were spending less and less free breaks together, but whatever. It was cool. Things seemed like they were finally looking up for him. He was so, so close to finally being able to tell her. Soon enough, even, he'd be able to break off from the wall and into the sunset, together with her by his side.
That was the happy ending that was missing from the poem. The boy against a wall needed to find his girl, a girl that had something that no one else had, so he could be the boy who had something special and that something special was her. Nobody else, only her. It was the kind of special thing that would make everyone jealous, something better than any relationship in their school.
Yoshitoki smiled to himself.
I'll tell her when the time is right. I'll tell her for sure. He had already told Shuuya a few weeks back about her. Telling him had been hard enough. Why, he didn't know. Probably too afraid to ruin things by saying them out in the air. That's why it's only "kind of liking" her. You can't say the truth out loud. Things get messed up that way. Once you say those three simple words, everything gets screwed up.
I should tell her next week. But, no, wait. Bad idea. I've arleady got a good thing going. Why mess it up now? I should keep things as they are. She tells me a whole lot of stuff, after all. Quiet girl in class, but she's not that quiet. It's like she's got this refined sense of loudness or something. Noriko's so cool - she's not afraid to call anybody by their first name. Cute.
Sure, she's not as much of a leader as Yukie is. Sure, she's not as outwardly smart as Satomi or Motobuchi. Maybe, she's not as athletic as Takako. Who cares about that stuff? She's got so much more to offer than all of that other stuff. Nori's perfect the way she is. I wouldn't want her to be anyone than who she already is.
If he were any better at writing, he'd spend all day writing stories about her. He'd write about her hair, her mouth, her eyes; every single
okay, that's enough, Yoshi. You're getting way too sappy here. Do something, stop sitting around and thinking! Go out and find her and tell her. You can be special for her.
"Yes." He mouthed the word. He could do this. It wasn't like he had anybody in the way. Every poem she wrote about that mysterious boy traced back to him. Great hair (Yoshitoki tried), nice eyes (eh, his eyes weren't all that nice, but he would take any compliment he could get), and a gorgeous smile that made her feel important (that was the biggest clue). It was obvious. She had some sort of feeling. Everything he had been doing was working. He had some sort of chance. And maybe, that chance was today.
Of course, he had been feeling this same way a couple days ago, too, but - but that was totally a trial run. He didn't have to say anything during the trial run.
He walked out into the hallway, ready to write the happy ending to his poem. No, more than write. Co-write. It was her happy ending, too. Yeah, just you and
Shuuya? Since when did you talk to Shuuya without me around?
Since when did your face look like that at a guy? Since when did your eyes start looking like that? Your eyes. Your face is flushing. You're staring. You're staring at him and he's staring at you and you're both staring at eachother and here I am standing here staring at you staring at him and - damnit!
"Ahahaha..." If he hadn't laughed, he might have cried. "Break time's almost over, Shuu, let's get back to class."
How could he have been so fucking clueless? Noriko Nakagawa and Shuuya Nanahara. Should've seen it coming from a mile away. Should've seen it coming before it ran him over. I can't breathe. Pressure, pressure pushing his lungs down.
"Of course. Of course, Yoshitoki," Noriko said with a slight bow of her head. Sweet words. "I'll see the both of you later- thank you very much for today, Shuuya." Sweet words scribing daggers in his chest. One last look at the musician and she was gone, disappearing into a crowd of girls far off in the hallway.
-
"Hey, um, I have to go meet up with a friend this break time."
"Again? You did that last Monday, too, and the Monday before that." He smirked. "Seeing anyone special?"
"Kind of." Her voice had an obvious cheery note to it.
-
It was Shuuya, wasn't it, Noriko?
-
I remember she told me she loves listening to guitar playing.
she loves
listening to guitar playing.
I could amaze her with a couple of chords, no sweat. Yoshitoki smiled warmly, remembering the time when he asked her where all her inspiration came from. Her answer? A boy. A very special, kind-hearted boy like no one else.
-
The clues were all there, right in front of me.
-
"Hey, how's Shuuya doing with -- you know, the music and stuff?" Something about the way she said his name made his skin itch. "He's...really cool, don't you think?"
"Oh, that loser?" Yoshi joked. "Me 'n' him go way back. I taught him how to tie his shoes." He was walking Noriko home, as usual. It was starting to become their thing-to-do now. "I'm kidding when I call him a loser. We're best friends." It felt weird saying that. It sounded too girly. "I guess you could say we grew up together."
"So, you know everything about him?"
"Not much to know other than he's pretty stupid once you get to know him."
"Hey, you shouldn't say that about him, friends or not." Noriko's stern face was enough to make him stop the insults.
"You should know him already, anyway. You and him talk."
"Yeah, with you around. I just...I just wish I had something for him."
Yoshitoki didn't even hear what Shuuya had said. "Thought you weren't looking for a girlfriend?" This kid...Shuu was actually stealing her away. Thought you were still into that fat girl. Thought you weren't going to take Noriko. He didn't look his friend in the eye. All he could make complete eye contact with was the wall behind Shuu, right over his shoulder. Shiney, almost laminate walls distorted his reflection back at him.
What's wrong with me?
"Whoa, wait- what? Where'd that come from? You feeling okay? I didn't mean to-" Look at you, you act like you're so confused. Perfect. You forgot, didn't you? How fucking convenient. "...Oh. Oh, man. Hold on."
"Something for him? What do you mean by that?" He expertly raised an eyebrow at her.
"What I mean is - is that we have nothing in common. Shuuya's just so Shuuya and I'm so me." Noriko sighed. "I want to be friends with him, you know, but it's like we're in two different worlds."
"Wait a minute now, what makes him so much better than you?"
"Shuuya's a rockstar, Nobu."
And you're my star. That should be good enough for you. "Is this seriously bringing you down this much?" He laughed. "Shuuya's friends with everyone. It's not that hard to talk to him. You do it all the time."
"Only when you're there." Noriko looked frustrated, like she wasn't getting her message through to him. "I need something that we have in common other than just you. Shuuya seems like such a nice guy and I want to be able to say things to him instead of just hi or laughing when you make jokes with him. Do you understand what I'm saying, Yoshitoki? Help me out here, you're my friend."
"Okay, okay. It's simple, really. I know the perfect way for you two to start talking more." Yoshi beamed. It was a genius plan. "You know how he's into music, right?"
"Y-yeah! Of course!"
"And a lot of music has lyrics, right?"
"Right, right."
"And lyrics are just words strung together, kind of like poems, right?"
"Oh! Yoshitoki, you're the best." She was smiling wider than he was. "I don't know what I would do without you. Thank you so, so much."
"Don't mention it."
-
"I'm not interested in her at all. You know that. And she doesn't like me." Shuuya went on. Yoshi was too caught up in his thoughts to pay full attention. She doesn't like you, you sure about that? She begged me to help her talk to you and this is the thanks that I get for it. I told you I liked her and look how much it's working for us. "...You okay, Yoshi? You're sure you don't want me to put in a good word?"
...
What?
Something snapped. "I don't-" What the hell was he saying? What the hell did he mean by a good word? It was like, it was almost as if he was saying he couldn't get her without one. Is that what you're saying? "A good word! I don't need you to put in a good word for me, thank you very much. We might not all have rock star charm, but-"
"Shuuya's a rockstar, Nobu."
. . .very special...like no one else.
Babbling. Shuuya was babbling a response now, full of all kinds of sorries. "Noriko... I hardly see her. And I mean see her. I don't really see her face. It's blurry to me. Not the way that I saw Kazumi's." Whatever, whatever. I don't get what Noriko sees in you that she can't find in me. For fuck's sake, Shuu, I told you about her.
"It's not..." It's not like I've got anything for her. "S'not... s'not like..." you can't get anybody you want. You can. So why not leave Noriko alone? He let out a long, weighty breath of air, unsure of what to say next. "...Sorry I snapped, Shuu. I've been having a weird morning. Lack of sleep." Lie.
Another apology. Another reason for Yoshi not to care. Why bother?
"Look, you're going to get her. I know it. And if you think she's got eyes for anybody but you, you're wrong. You're great, Yoshi. She likes you. Any girl would." Good one.
"You say so," Yoshi said, touching a piece of his hair. Great hair, yeah, right. What a dream. I can't even grow it that long without it looking stupid. "Class time, Shuu. Let's focus." He turned away.
"Yeah...Yeah, of course. Just... let's talk about this later, okay? If you need to talk, that is."
"Sure."
No.
Hope had died with Shinji and Noriko. Mimura, out of anyone on the island, could come up with a plan to get them out of this mess. Escape, yeah, right. Look what happened. Yeah, to some level, Yoshitoki could come up with the ideas. He could think of things to do - he already had.
He vaguely remembered some of the technical tricks Mr. Abe had taught him when he was younger - lame, useless computer tricks that could only come in handy if he had a laptop. Oh, and machinery stuff that had kept him awake at night, trying to figure out the mechanics that went into things like cars and dishwashers. Yoshi had been eleven at that time, if he remembered right. Too young to grasp the overall concepts he was being taught, but he had been smart enough to pull enough details together to get somewhere.
Well, somewhere, that is, if your version of somewhere was nowhere at all. Yoshitoki was better at coming up with reasons for ideas not to work. It came with the cynical territory. Oh, shit, oh, shit. Everything was wrong now. His chest hurt all over again. There was nothing left for him to throw up, so he was left rolling around, hiccuping uncontrollably.
I'm out. They're going to kill me, Noriko. There's no one left. No one left.
Why doesn't anybody like me?
You didn't even like me. Everybody left me. Me, me, me. I'm not good enough for anyone.
Six hours went by with him staring up at the sky turning from dark to light, absolutely soaked. There weren't any names on the report. Twenty two people left. Twenty one people to die before he could go home. Home? What home? Twenty one before he could hang out with Ms. Anno again. Twenty one before he could play with all the little kids, sing stupid songs, play a little game of catch. Twenty one. Twenty one.
"Twenty one." By the looks of it, he wouldn't even live to be twenty one. Kids could drink then, right? That was the time when you're supposed to be an adult. "Less than forty eight hours." The dawn rays washed over him, giving him a slight headache. "We'll all die at the next midnight if...if nothing happens." He mumbled, echoing Sakamochi's report.
Yoshitoki Kuninobu didn't want to die. Who did? Time passed by without him getting up. One more death. Fumiyo Fujiyoshi, that nurse girl. Not enough of a personality to remember. Oh, what time was it? Noon. The beginning of the end.
I don't want to be a loser.
I don't want to die as some un-special person.
I can't go this way. I don't want to die like that...
He glanced over at Mitsuru and Keita's unrecognizable bodies. They were drying out in the sun, long forgotten by their peers. Noriko's name had been before theirs on the report, meaning that, maybe if Yoshi had gotten out of the house faster, he could've -
I could have saved you.
If I had been better... I could have saved you.
Now it's me by myself!
(all alone alone ain't this familiar)
The only one that's gonna be disappointed in the end will be me.
Don't want to die a loser.
I don't want everyone to forget about me.
very special...like no one else
No matter what, Noriko.
"...but if you die now, you're still just a loser."
not enough personality
got him in the neck - in the neck!!!
21 students remaining. Half way there. 36 hours left.
we'll find a way, our way.
so scared...
If they're not killing fast enough then that means I have to kill.
Kill to win.If I have to kill, then I have to play.
If I wanna go home, I'll have to play.
play play play
kill kill kill
It's me versus them.
I'm not evil. I'm not a bad guy. This makes perfect sense.
I just wanna go home.
I just wanna be special.
I can't die a loser.
I can't die before I'm supposed to.
Noriko, I needed you. I needed you, I needed you.
I have to play if I wanna live.
It makes sense, doesn't it?
He was walking now, swarmed by all his thoughts. He had to do it. He had to play. There weren't any other options. Escape? Impossible. Their last chances had all died. Mimura was dead. Sugimura was dead. Noriko was dead. Hope died. There wasn't any way off the island. Staying in the house back at F6 was aa death trap. Look, don't blame me. It's a total damned-if-you-do-damned-if-you-don't thing.
If I don't kill, I'll die.
If I do kill, I'm -
well. . . Shit, I'm crying. Why am I crying? Why can't I stop crying?
There were kids lying under a tree not too far from him. He had reached D5 and he could see their faces, but not their names. Breathed in the air. The smell of blood had never left him. It probably never would, much like the noises the guns made when they fired. He closed his eyes for a moment, to let everything sink in.
"I want to be like no one else," He murmured, backing up. Yoshitoki shook all the memories of them out of his head. Only numbers. No names. "No one's going to forget me." He raised up his arm, hoping, praying that neither of them would wake.
As his arm traced a solid arc, he let the wiimote go. It flew through the air...
And all he would make them remember, all that he would make them think about, breathe about was a name.
"Nobu!"
((OOC: Yoshitoki Kuninobu throws the wiimote at Toshinori Oda. Does he kill, wound, or miss him? No hard feelings! Wait for mod post to vote. The flashback sequence with Shuu and Yoshi talking was from an already posted Shuu post - this is just Yoshi's side of it, so it should be fine PC approval-wise. The mentionings of Kiriyama at the top part of the post also happened in a Kiriyama post, so it, too, should be fine. :D Thanks.))