I HATE being socially retarded

[boyling_point]

I just....am really bad at being social. Like there are people at my work that I think are pretty cool and I would like to get to know them, but I'm like....afraid of talking to people. Like...I feel like they will be annoyed with me or something or think I am weird or creepy or something. And like at work I am supposed to have a 3 month review and I like...get anxiety when I think about going in a room and talking to people about work and other workers....I am like putting off filling out the paper that they want to me fill out before they do the review cause...I just don't want to have people staring at me and listening to me. I am not the best with saying the right things, EVER, lol, and I hate being the center of attention....I am horrible at saying what I am thinking, especially in the most effective way. I don't know how to become friends with people. I have to let people come to me, but because I act so withdrawn, people tend to get the wrong idea, like I DON'T want to be their friend or DON'T want them to talk to me. When in reality, I want them to talk to me more than anything. But how do you say that without sounding extremely creepy? I don't even know what anything I say sounds like, I just think it all sounds like crap to me, it all sounds.....really weird and really stupid and/or not what I want to convey. Even when I am trying to think of what to type, I just want to keep explaining cause I don't think any way that I say it sounds like the right way to say it.

I just want to become friends with certain people, and I just don't know how. =[