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boxsledder

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Aug 28, 2004 08:31

You know that quote from Office Space... I'm not sure the exact thing, but here goes... "Every new day is the worst day of my life, so every time you see me it will be the worst day of my life." It's something like that... well that's how I feel ( Read more... )

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F-That anonymous August 28 2004, 23:56:48 UTC

Well so this is how it truly is...just fucking me? Nothing special? Thanks for lying to me, thanks for "caring" for me. Thanks for bruising me, thanks for hurting me, thanks for being a dick to me. *Deep Sarcasm* I gave you a second chance, but in the end I am the one who gets burned. I probably shouldn't have even given you anything at all, but that's what I get for being trustworthy...for believing that something inside you had changed for the better. But, in the end it's your loss. All your emo-bull isn't fooling anyone, you've created your own misery and hell. You try to pull everyone in and you pulled me in with you, but I won't stay down there with you. I can't waste my time feeling like shit for your mistakes and your games. So, I wasn't the one, not the special one...but why did you do it in the first place? I think I have every right to be angry just a little bit...but hey whatev- here's looking at you kid *bang bang*

Re: F-That anonymous August 29 2004, 09:07:03 UTC

No need to be a bitch about it. Let the kid vent. I've went through the same stuff (minus the drinking and smoking) and it helps to vent.

"That other Emo Kid who used to have a journal"
Neal.

Re: F-That anonymous August 29 2004, 23:50:54 UTC

If he has a right to vent, then so do I...there is no double standard. One for one, check mate. Besides, you don't know the entire situation or my side of it at all.

Re: F-That anonymous August 30 2004, 17:53:08 UTC

I was simply saying you didn't need to talk how you did. He was venting a lot of stuff, and you more or less yelled at him.

Point of the story, I don't really care. its not my argument you crazy kids can fuck whoever you want.

Nigel

Re: F-That boxsledder August 29 2004, 09:25:26 UTC

You're going all wrong about this. You did mean a lot to to me, okay? It really was special. I was just saying that if me and you were still going out after that year and a half then I could have seen us doing it. All I ment was that I always thought I would have done it with someone I knew everything about, not someone I haven't talked to in years. You know what I mean. I didn't mean to make you feel bad or anything. All I was saying was it came out of nowhere, I was expecting it at all.

Re: F-That anonymous August 29 2004, 23:59:32 UTC

That's not what your journal proclaimed, it said that you wanted to have sex with someone special, meaningful...but since you fucked me that wouldn't happen...basically saying right there that I didn't mean shit. Saying that you wasted it. I don't know Chris, you are way too much. And you wondered how I could've felt used...well by reading your journal it was quite certain to feel that way. I can't say I won't stop loving you, but I don't think I could love what you do. In fact, I can't. I just feel shitty. If you want to know what I feel or think...go to myspace.com...just look under my e-mail address. You certainly know how to treat your ladies, don't you? I don't want to be sour, but you're like a lemon.

Re: F-That boxsledder August 30 2004, 14:34:18 UTC

I seriously didn't mean it like that. You are special, just my first time wasn't how I wanted it, that's it. Nothing else to it, don't feel bad, I did enjoy it, it was good, great actually, but there wasn't that strong emotional attachment I would have liked... that's all it was... I'm extremely sorry about everything I've done or haven't done to you... I'm sorry.

Re: F-That anonymous August 31 2004, 00:21:41 UTC

I didn't pick up the phone because I didn't hear it ring. I walked away because what else could I say to you that you don't already know? How am I to feel? What am I to think. I just expect you to be an asshole to me, to say something in spite...to say something to purposely hurt me...to make me stupid enough to crawl back to you everytime...stupid enough to feel all those things I used to feel for you...well you make it easier on me to remove those feelings, it's just abnormally painful for me to bare. So it's all a battle I suppose...I don't want it to be that way. I know how everyone views me, even you. So I am just going to stop being foolish and let you to yourself. If you want to call, fine, but I'd rather you be more careful with my feelings despite how special I may be or may not be to you.

violentbella@cs.com @ www.myspace.com

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