(no subject)
I'm so ambivalent it's weird.
Bought the latest Stargate magazine to appear in Australia, the one with the Paul interview. I had sworn off it once Torri left, but here I am. And I was pleased that they still have references to Elizabeth and include a few pictures of her here and there, and came up with questions on her character in the quiz, so it's not like she's totally forgotten. Even though I'm totally grasping at straws and this doesn't make up for anything and it's nowhere near enough, but they're trying a little, at least. I hate the fact that they probably won't be interviewing Torri ever again or having posters of Elizabeth, but I'm now at the point where I can actually read about the other actors without being totally bitter and hating the world.
That's not the weird part, though. The thing is, when they had Carter on the cover as 'leader of Atlantis' a while back, and when I read her 'mission reports' in the magazine as she oversees Atlantis and see posters of her with the Atlantis cast, I just feel so hostile and pissed off and I want to bash someone. But on the flip side of the Atlantis poster in this latest issue, there's Carter with Daniel, Cam and Teal'c. In contrast to the sober, grim Atlantis poster, all four are laughing, they're happy, they look like they're having a good time...and I entertain no mean thoughts about Carter, no hostility towards her, no desire to rip her to shreds- the only negative thing I have to say is that 'Omg, they left out Vala!'
I've been watching s9 and s10 of SG-1 lately and it made me remember how much I used to love Carter. And that's the real crime of her having been on Atlantis, and why I'm glad she's left. Not because I unequivocally hate her, not becaues I'm whole heartedly, 100% filled with loathing for her and I'm gleeful she's been ditched from the show- but because her presence on Atlantis had terrible repercussions for her and I'm actually thinking of what's best for the character. I thought I hated Carter, when I really just hated her being on Atlantis. My despair over Elizabeth and the circumstances under which Carter came to Atlantis and my dislike for her as a result of that bled over into my feelings for her in general, and on SG-1.
I couldn't watch SG-1 for the longest time because I couldn't stand the thought of her, I regretted ever buying the dvds because I thought I wouldn't be able to watch them ever again because of her, I thought anything associated with her was sucky and worthless, and it took me this long to figure out that I have nothing against Carter herself. And that's what the writers did with their efforts to make Atlantis more 'popular', to amp up the ratings- because of their clumsy, bumbling attempts to improve something that worked great to begin with, they made a Carter fan like me into this ranting, raving hater who took every chance to pay her out and stomp on everything she symbolized.
I can't come up with the words to explain how terrible that is. I was actually obsessed with her a few years back, I idolized her, I wrote S/J fic, I fixated on shippy eps, I had hundreds of caps of her for my screensaver- and they got me to passionately loathe her. It's so scary that they have that kind of power. I don't know, maybe it's almost better that the current writers didn't keep Weir around because the thought that they could've destroyed her like that, that they could have screwed her up to the extent that I'd lose all the love and affection I have for her is disturbing.
I'm still working on dealing with the aftermath of the whole Carter thing because sometimes my head can't handle my split reactions to her. But now I'm happily putting up posters of her with SG-1, and I'm watching SG-1 dvds and okay, I still visit the anti-Carter thread, but I see what it really is: the anti-Carter on Atlantis thread. I didn't get that distinction before. I've given up on SGA post season 3, because no matter how much I like her in the other series, I still loathe the sight of her as city leader, but now that I have some distance and some perspective, I have the divisions clearly mapped out in my head.
Carter on SG-1: good.
Carter on SGA: bad.
And I can kinda keep them separate now. It's so weird, I never could've imagine myself being so compartmentalized before.
Bought the latest Stargate magazine to appear in Australia, the one with the Paul interview. I had sworn off it once Torri left, but here I am. And I was pleased that they still have references to Elizabeth and include a few pictures of her here and there, and came up with questions on her character in the quiz, so it's not like she's totally forgotten. Even though I'm totally grasping at straws and this doesn't make up for anything and it's nowhere near enough, but they're trying a little, at least. I hate the fact that they probably won't be interviewing Torri ever again or having posters of Elizabeth, but I'm now at the point where I can actually read about the other actors without being totally bitter and hating the world.
That's not the weird part, though. The thing is, when they had Carter on the cover as 'leader of Atlantis' a while back, and when I read her 'mission reports' in the magazine as she oversees Atlantis and see posters of her with the Atlantis cast, I just feel so hostile and pissed off and I want to bash someone. But on the flip side of the Atlantis poster in this latest issue, there's Carter with Daniel, Cam and Teal'c. In contrast to the sober, grim Atlantis poster, all four are laughing, they're happy, they look like they're having a good time...and I entertain no mean thoughts about Carter, no hostility towards her, no desire to rip her to shreds- the only negative thing I have to say is that 'Omg, they left out Vala!'
I've been watching s9 and s10 of SG-1 lately and it made me remember how much I used to love Carter. And that's the real crime of her having been on Atlantis, and why I'm glad she's left. Not because I unequivocally hate her, not becaues I'm whole heartedly, 100% filled with loathing for her and I'm gleeful she's been ditched from the show- but because her presence on Atlantis had terrible repercussions for her and I'm actually thinking of what's best for the character. I thought I hated Carter, when I really just hated her being on Atlantis. My despair over Elizabeth and the circumstances under which Carter came to Atlantis and my dislike for her as a result of that bled over into my feelings for her in general, and on SG-1.
I couldn't watch SG-1 for the longest time because I couldn't stand the thought of her, I regretted ever buying the dvds because I thought I wouldn't be able to watch them ever again because of her, I thought anything associated with her was sucky and worthless, and it took me this long to figure out that I have nothing against Carter herself. And that's what the writers did with their efforts to make Atlantis more 'popular', to amp up the ratings- because of their clumsy, bumbling attempts to improve something that worked great to begin with, they made a Carter fan like me into this ranting, raving hater who took every chance to pay her out and stomp on everything she symbolized.
I can't come up with the words to explain how terrible that is. I was actually obsessed with her a few years back, I idolized her, I wrote S/J fic, I fixated on shippy eps, I had hundreds of caps of her for my screensaver- and they got me to passionately loathe her. It's so scary that they have that kind of power. I don't know, maybe it's almost better that the current writers didn't keep Weir around because the thought that they could've destroyed her like that, that they could have screwed her up to the extent that I'd lose all the love and affection I have for her is disturbing.
I'm still working on dealing with the aftermath of the whole Carter thing because sometimes my head can't handle my split reactions to her. But now I'm happily putting up posters of her with SG-1, and I'm watching SG-1 dvds and okay, I still visit the anti-Carter thread, but I see what it really is: the anti-Carter on Atlantis thread. I didn't get that distinction before. I've given up on SGA post season 3, because no matter how much I like her in the other series, I still loathe the sight of her as city leader, but now that I have some distance and some perspective, I have the divisions clearly mapped out in my head.
Carter on SG-1: good.
Carter on SGA: bad.
And I can kinda keep them separate now. It's so weird, I never could've imagine myself being so compartmentalized before.