Crash and Burn (Lifetimes AU, 71,955 words) - Part 12
Title: Crash and Burn (Lifetimes #28)
Authors:
bookishlady242 and
ocelot_l
Pairings: Harvey/Linkara, 90s Kid/80s Dan, Boffo/Linksano, Kung-Tai Ted/Ninja-Style Dancer
Rating: R
Warnings/Triggers: Graphic violence, graphic blood, heavy angst, mind control, hallucinations, drug use, references to drug use, death, references to past death, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, allusions to sex, mild sexual activity
Summary: When Linkara learns about a devastating new weapon which could destroy lives if it falls into the wrong hands, he and his team must prepare for a mission harder than any they've faced before. When challenges threaten their lives and their ties of friendship, will they manage to save the world and, most importantly, themselves?
DISCLAIMER: We do not own the characters, the shows, or the people who portray the characters. This is meant as a work of fiction and is fair use. Please support the creators by watching their videos, letting the ads play, buying their DVDs and merchandise, and/or contributing to their Patreon(s). "Crash and Burn" is performed by Savage Garden.
Very special thanks to
njdoodler112 and
trulyamindlost for the bonus content! :D
Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4/ Part 5/ Part 6/ Part 7/ Part 8/ Part 9/ Part 10/ Part 11/ Part 13/ Part 14/Bonus Material
Linkara turned to each of his friends, looking serious and slightly scared, but doing his best to exude confidence.
“Okay. Does everyone understand the plan?”
“Affirmative.”
*Yes, Linkara.*
“For sure, man.”
Linkara nodded and clamped the lid down on the mystical box they’d received half an hour ago before standing up straight, his determination and jaw unwavering. “Then let’s go save Harvey.”
The others straightened up as well and soon the four started to walk down the white hallway in the opposite direction from which they’d walked before, quietly but confidently. Ninja’s senses were heightened to their peak; 90s Kid’s weapons were fully powered and ready for action; Linksano’s medical kit was prepared to tackle any injury which might befall his companions, and Linkara was keeping a hand close to the pocket where he stored the Magic Gun. He truly hoped that he would not have to rely on her power to resolve this situation, but at this point Linkara was prepared to do whatever it took.
It wasn’t long before the golden letters of the one-time password to the Gryffindor common room appeared before 90s Kid. He nodded to the others and opened the door, revealing the familiar grassy Quidditch field with its pointy towers and tall hooped poles. Linkara had intended to keep his determined expression throughout the entirety of this meeting, but once he realized that a flailing lounge singer was tied to the tallest Quidditch hoop, his confidence was dashed instantly.
“Harvey!” Linkara stared up in horror at the older man who was now un-blindfolded, but still gagged and very tightly bound to the uppermost part of the goalpost. Harvey was sweating terribly, his skin paler than it had ever been before, and he was keeping his eyes tightly shut as he tried to avoid looking down at the world spread out so far below him. He couldn’t keep his body from trembling, his soaking clothes no doubt making him even more uncomfortable. All four members of the team found themselves staring up at him in dismay.
“Oh dude, he’s up so high!” 90s Kid cried, looking almost as terrified as Linkara did. “We have to get him down!”
“He’ll be released in due time.”
Linkara uttered a soft growl when he heard her voice from behind him, and his fingers tightened around the quill case. He whirled around to face Elle, his previous determination returning, and said through grit teeth, “Give Harvey back. Right now.”
Elle looked up at Harvey and laughed, as though his suffering caused her amusement. “He doesn’t look as though he’s having a very fun time. If you want his suffering to end, you’ll hand over what I desire post haste.”
Linkara stared at Elle, peering as deeply into her eyes as he could, trying to reason with her. “You have to understand that we’ve gone through hell trying to get this artifact. We’ve done things that have traumatized us and caused us immeasurable pain. All we want is to go home and recover from all the crap this damn world has put us through.”
“We don’t want Harvey to hurt anymore, he means so much to us,” 90s Kid begged. “Can’t you see that he’s totally cold and scared? Please, give him back to us!”
“Your words are touching, but the only thing I care about is that quill,” Elle replied, her eyes filling with a darkness that caused Linkara to recoil from her gaze. “I’m the one who has visited this wretched place time and time again, doing whatever was necessary to obtain the quill, but time and time again, it’s eluded my grasp. I don’t understand why, not when I’m the one who’s brought so many with me as offerings for every miserable trial this world throws at me - why did it reveal itself to you and not me?” Elle’s mask of ice melted away as a fiery rage twisted her features. “I’m the only one fit to be the true owner of that quill! Release it from your filthy hands! You don’t even understand this world, or the magic required to navigate it, let alone what that weapon is capable of!”
90s Kid let out a soft whimper, taking a step backwards, and in an instant, Elle’s rage was gone, the mask of cool composure sliding back into place. She offered Linkara another hollow smile. “So then, if you’d like to have Grandpa back unharmed, you’ll hand my quill over. Unless you’d like me to undo his binds and watch as he plunges to his demise.” Elle snapped her fingers and the ropes around the singer loosened slightly, causing Harvey to slowly slide down the pole, his eyes growing wide with fear.
“N-no!” 90s Kid cried, and Linkara hung his head, clenching his hands so tightly against the box that his fingers grew white.
“After all we’ve gone through to get this...” Linkara sighed and nodded his head in surrender. “Fine, it’s yours.”
“Nnnn! Mmmf! Nnnn!”
Muffled screams rained down from high above, coupled with pitiful shakes of Harvey’s head, but Linkara did his best to ignore them.
“I’m sorry, Harvey,” he murmured, holding out the box in defeat. “But a world without you just isn’t worth saving...”
Elle chuckled darkly as she accepted the box, clutching it tightly with her long, painted nails. “I knew your feelings for your teammates would be your undoing. The strongest teams are created by those willing to make sacrifices for the greater good.”
“Do you honestly think a lecture is what we need right now?” Linksano snapped, staring venomously at the woman.
“I can think of a number of things you need, but I’ll spare you for now.” Elle traced her fingers over the cool wood of the case before turning her back to the team, flaunting how confident she felt in their lack of ability to take action against her. “Go ahead; rescue the poor old fool before his fear causes him to become incontinent as well as nauseous.”
90s Kid snarled and clenched his hands, wanting nothing more than to aim his BFG at her, but a quick glance from Linkara caused him instead to swallow his anger and nod. He understood very well what they needed to do.
*So, you will release Harvey?* Ninja asked.
Somehow, Elle saw his card without turning around. “There are a number of brooms lying about this place. Go ahead and fly up to him if you want. Or leave him. I really don’t care.”
Linkara once again resisted the urge to pull out his trusted partner, and instead reached down to the ground, grabbing a shiny Firebolt. “Come on, guys. We can’t leave Harvey any longer.” The others nodded and soon were following Linkara through the air on broomsticks of their own as they headed toward the highest goalpost.
Unfortunately they were all forced to scatter from their single-file formation once an assortment of items started to fly at them from every direction. Instead of being tormented by Bludgers visible only to 90s Kid, this time the four were attacked by highly visible, and highly dangerous, items. 90s Kid yelped as a bullet grazed his shoulder, while Linksano squealed and swooped wildly to avoid being hit by several daggers. Ninja at once went to work sending out kunai and shuriken to disrupt the flights of the attacking weapons, while Linkara cursed and cast as many shielding spells as he could remember.
“Damn it all! I thought you said we could have Harvey if we traded!” he cried out to Elle angrily.
“Of course, he’s all yours!” Elle cried, laughing loudly at their screams. “I just thought this type of rescue attempt would be much more fun!”
“Don’t let any of this stop you! We have to get to Harvey!” Linkara shouted. “Stay close to me so I can shield you!” Linkara continued shouting out magic spells to protect them as they flew, while Ninja wielded every weapon he had in his armory.
90s Kid’s skillful flying caused him to be the first one to reach Harvey and he zoomed behind him to start untying his ropes. “Don’t worry, Dad, I’ve got you,” he murmured, hoping to reassure Harvey that things would be alright.
Linkara approached next, welcoming Harvey’s heavy, wet, trembling body onto his broomstick and into his arms. Harvey was looking much the worse for wear as he clung to Linkara for dear life, his body cold and clothes still dripping water.
“How c-c-c-could you do that, K-K-Kid?” he asked between chattering teeth. Though his eyes held exhaustion, disappointment and dismay also lurked within. “You s-should have left m-m-me. What happened to p-p-putting the m-mission first? To p-putting the world first?”
Linkara shot him a confident smile, his arms tightening around Harvey’s body. “Do you really think I’d betray the whole world that easily, Harvey? You’ve forgotten one thing about me: even though I’m a hero, I’m not above fighting dirty.”
An ear-piercing shriek suddenly filled the sky, causing the team to look down. They watched as Elle threw off her cloak, revealing bare arms that were now covered in blood, words carved deep into her flesh. 90s Kid wore a smile of grim pleasure as she started howling at them.
“You’d better not tell lies.”
”Damn it! What is this?” Elle howled, clutching at her bleeding wounds desperately. “Come here!” She snapped and one of her hooded minions appeared, seemingly confused as the quill and a notepad were thrust into his hands. “Write something with this! If there is a protective spell on it, I need to see how it works!”
The minion reluctantly started writing with the quill before he hissed and dropped it to the ground, grabbing at the back of his now-bleeding hand. Elle roared and shot a bolt of black lightning from her hand directly at the quill, disintegrating it instantly, before turning her fury-filled face towards the team.
“What is this?! What have you done to me?! Where is the real quill?!”
It was Linkara’s turn to laugh darkly this time. “Well, Elle, I might just be a crappy novice when it comes to magic, but illusion spells are actually pretty easy to pull off. And I think I did a damn good job casting one on that torture quill from 90s Kid’s trial. Or maybe the one I cast on 90s Kid himself was better, since it allowed him to slip through this room without the high and mighty sorceress noticing a thing,” he added, chuckling when Elle let out another howl of rage.
“You’re right, I shouldn’t be so modest - both of those spells were amazing! Now, as for your last question…” Linkara opened his coat and touched the pocket where normally he stored his Magic Gun, but presently was storing something much more important. “I was going to hand the quill over to you fair and square, but then I thought that this type of deception would be much more fun!”
“Get them!” Elle shrieked, snapping her fingers so many times they began to emit smoke. A cascade of hooded figures appeared before her, bowed, and then took flight, not one needing a broomstick to stay aloft.
“Everyone touch some part of me!” Linkara barked, outstretching his arms so that the others could comply with his wishes.
“I-I never shoulda doubted you, Kid,” Harvey muttered, pressing his face against Linkara’s shoulder as he sagged against his broad back.
Linkara let out a small grin before he snapped, “Everyone holding on tight?”
“Yeah!”
*Affirmative.*
“For Tesla’s sake, get us out of here!”
Linkara nodded and quickly spoke the words that he’d first spoken what seemed to be a lifetime ago. The five men were enveloped in a bright, golden light before they vanished from the Aisles of Write at last.
-----
Ted rang the doorbell to Linkara’s apartment and only had to wait ten seconds before it was flung open and he was pulled into a tight embrace by Boffo.
“Oof!” Ted cried out in surprise before he tentatively hugged the clown back. “G-greetings my friend. I am also h-happy to see you...and also hoping to breathe again sometime soon.”
Boffo quickly pulled back and honked an apology but Ted smiled and brushed it off. He knew that Boffo craved touch as comfort and honestly Ted did as well, so he didn’t mind indulging him in this time of need.
Please come in, Ted!
“I certainly will! I-oh.” Ted looked more closely at Boffo’s clown nose, which was for some reason colored bright blue instead of red. “I hope you haven’t been feeling sad lately, Boffo,” he said, feeling a touch concerned.
Sad? Boffo looked puzzled for a moment until he realized that Ted was staring at his nose. Oh. No, I’m not sad, Ted. I simply switched my nose out for a different one to celebrate April Fool’s Day. He explained calmly.
“I see. How, um, comedic of you,” Ted replied, honestly not sure what to make of this joke.
Thanks. Boffo failed to notice Ted’s awkwardness and calmly led him into the living room.
“Greetings, Dan!” Ted said when he spotted the man. “I hope you’re ready for movie night because I brought some Kung-Fu classics, all of which happen to be from the 80s!”
Dan, who was still quite pale and much thinner than he’d been before 90s Kid left, looked up at Ted with a small smile. “Well hello, my friend. I’m glad to see you’re doing well. Thanks for bringing the movies tonight. I made some refreshments if you’re hungry.” Dan lifted a plate of churros from the coffee table and offered it to Ted. “I’ve run out of things to make from my regular cookbook, so Dolly bought me an international one.”
Ted took a bite of one and smiled. “Delicious. You are truly talented, Dan.”
Dan offered a weak smile in return and nibbled on a churro as well, soon coating his lips in white powder that he was slow to lick off. “Thanks, my friend. Tomorrow, I’m going to try baumkuchen.”
I’m sure it will be as delicious as these churros are. Boffo said as he sat down on the couch beside the other man and reached for one as well. Ted observed the two as they silently munched their churros, noting that they both still seemed rather subdued, and felt the desire to help his friends feel better grow stronger within him.
Ted knew that Dan and Boffo were still doing the best they could to deal with their loneliness, though there had been a few rough patches here and there. Dan had started going to NA meetings again, but he still sometimes called Ted on his cell phone in the middle of the night, needing to be reassured that it couldn’t be much longer until 90s Kid was home, since he had never been apart from him this long before. It usually took about an hour to get Dan settled down, but at least Ted was sure that Dan wasn’t sneaking off to buy drugs again, which was a very good sign.
Boffo was putting on the braver face, as he always did, but Ted noticed times where Boffo needed to excuse himself from the room abruptly whenever he brought up Linksano’s name (and the poor thing mentioned his name quite often). When he came back, Boffo was always smiling, but Ted could see the added makeup around his eyes. At least Boffo still ate well and worked out regularly, so he appeared outwardly healthy if nothing else.
As for Ted, he was doing much better after receiving the message from Ninja. Being reminded of Ninja’s love and the fact that he was safe helped him rest easier than he had been since the dancer’s departure, and sometimes if he focused really hard, he could feel Ninja’s strong arms around him as he laid in bed. This always gave Ted an added boost of confidence and pep, and so he decided to use his positive energy to cheer up his friends, since he didn’t think he could take the strained, brittle smiles of Boffo and Dan any longer.
“Actually, we seem to have been watching many movies lately,” Ted said, placing the VHS boxes down. “What do you say we play a game? That would be a fun way to spend an afternoon, don’t you think?”
“A game?” Dan repeated, looking surprised. “I haven’t played any games since Kid left...I don’t even know if I remember the rules to anything.” He gave a short, rough laugh that sounded odd, but Ted would not be rebuffed so easily.
“Well, that won’t do at all, Dan. What will Kid say when he comes home and wants to engage you in a round of Punch-Out!! one evening?”
Dan suddenly looked distraught. “Do you think Kid will be mad? I would never want to make him mad, or-or sad, not ever!”
“No, no of course not,” Ted quickly corrected, mentally kicking himself for forgetting how fragile Dan was. “90s Kid would never be mad or sad because of you, Dan! But he’d certainly have a lot more fun if your skills were sharp enough to give him a real challenge, don’t you think?”
“Oh.” Dan nodded, taking Ted’s words to heart. “You’re right. I want Kid to have fun with me w-when he comes back. Yeah. Yeah, you’re right, you’re right.” Dan smiled then, a truly warm smile this time. “So, what should we play, Ted?”
“Why don’t we ask Boffo?” Ted suggested, turning toward the clown then. “You always know lots of fun games to play with the kids at the hospital, right?”
Boffo couldn’t help looking happier as he thought of the children he loved so dearly. Yes, we do have fun together. I’m not sure if either of you would enjoy our games though...
“Oh, I don’t think that’s true at all,” Ted continued, placing a hand on Boffo’s shoulder and squeezing it gently. “You’re a creative and fun-loving guy, Boffo. You’re also better at figuring out what we need more than we are sometimes,” he admitted with a chuckle. “So please, Boffo, think about what kind of game Dan and I need to play tonight.”
Boffo looked surprised by these words, but his cheeks were slightly tinted red with happiness, letting Ted know that he’d been successful at last. Well, let’s see...oh, I know. Sometimes, when Pollo and I are at the base by ourselves, we pretend we run a detective agency. Boffo’s cheeks tinted a bit darker but he was smiling widely now. I know it sounds a bit silly to think of a clown and a robot as detectives-
“Silly? Are you kidding?” Dan cut in. “That sounds like the premise for the best buddy cop show ever! Oh, after Miami Vice of course.”
Really? Boffo asked, and when Dan nodded, he pulled the other man into a hug as well.
Ted was rather confused at Boffo’s choice of game, as he was not really a fan of buddy cop shows, but it was enough to get the scared puppy dog look out of both their eyes for once, so Ted was going to indulge them as much as he could. “Well then, where is your robot partner?”
“Right here,” Pollo announced, floating into the room wearing a suit and tie and makeshift detective’s badge, which Ted tried very hard not to find hilarious. Boffo reached into his coat and pulled out a badge as well, which upon closer inspection read: Boffo and Pollo - Detectives and Accountants at Large.
We’ll need to make badges for you two as well; you can be our honorary agents. Boffo honked, already feeling better now that he was getting into one of his favorite games.
“I wish I’d brought my favorite side holster,” Dan asked, remembering his full Sonny Crockett costume at Dolly’s house. “Ooh, but before we make badges, there’s a special skill that all agents should know, Boffo.”
What is that? Boffo asked, instantly alert and pleased to see Dan getting into the game to this degree.
“Follow me!” Dan surprised them by exiting the apartment and going down the stairs that led to the parking lot. Boffo, Pollo, and Ted trailed along behind him, watching as Dan walked over to his car. “Now watch this!” Dan backed up before charging at his car, jumping up, and smoothly gliding over the hood. Unfortunately his landing wasn’t quite as smooth and he stumbled a bit across the blacktop. “Whoa, I might be a little out of practice,” he murmured, straightening his glasses and feeling a tiny bit embarrassed about having just done that. Dan’s discomfiture faded quickly though when he saw Boffo jumping up and down, clapping joyfully.
That was wonderful! Let me try!
As Boffo and Dan spent time sliding across the top of his car and giggling like children, Pollo went to work creating the new badges for the honorary detectives, and Ted set off to hide some suspicious pieces of evidence for the detectives to find once the investigation began. Even though he felt a bit foolish climbing trees to plant false moustaches and digging holes to bury pieces of jewelry, Ted also felt heartened by the excited shouts and honks of his companions. If he had to endure a little dirt on his robes or a few knee burns to keep everyone smiling until their loved ones returned, then Ted would become the best martial artist/honorary detective the world had ever seen.
While the four were busy running around outside, Nimue sent out an alert signal from inside the base.
“Warning: a transmission will occur inside this apartment building within the next twenty-four hours. Preparations for the acceptance of this transmission will now begin.”
Authors:
bookishlady242 and
ocelot_l
Pairings: Harvey/Linkara, 90s Kid/80s Dan, Boffo/Linksano, Kung-Tai Ted/Ninja-Style Dancer
Rating: R
Warnings/Triggers: Graphic violence, graphic blood, heavy angst, mind control, hallucinations, drug use, references to drug use, death, references to past death, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, allusions to sex, mild sexual activity
Summary: When Linkara learns about a devastating new weapon which could destroy lives if it falls into the wrong hands, he and his team must prepare for a mission harder than any they've faced before. When challenges threaten their lives and their ties of friendship, will they manage to save the world and, most importantly, themselves?
DISCLAIMER: We do not own the characters, the shows, or the people who portray the characters. This is meant as a work of fiction and is fair use. Please support the creators by watching their videos, letting the ads play, buying their DVDs and merchandise, and/or contributing to their Patreon(s). "Crash and Burn" is performed by Savage Garden.
Very special thanks to
njdoodler112 and
trulyamindlost for the bonus content! :D
Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4/ Part 5/ Part 6/ Part 7/ Part 8/ Part 9/ Part 10/ Part 11/ Part 13/ Part 14/Bonus Material
Linkara turned to each of his friends, looking serious and slightly scared, but doing his best to exude confidence.
“Okay. Does everyone understand the plan?”
“Affirmative.”
*Yes, Linkara.*
“For sure, man.”
Linkara nodded and clamped the lid down on the mystical box they’d received half an hour ago before standing up straight, his determination and jaw unwavering. “Then let’s go save Harvey.”
The others straightened up as well and soon the four started to walk down the white hallway in the opposite direction from which they’d walked before, quietly but confidently. Ninja’s senses were heightened to their peak; 90s Kid’s weapons were fully powered and ready for action; Linksano’s medical kit was prepared to tackle any injury which might befall his companions, and Linkara was keeping a hand close to the pocket where he stored the Magic Gun. He truly hoped that he would not have to rely on her power to resolve this situation, but at this point Linkara was prepared to do whatever it took.
It wasn’t long before the golden letters of the one-time password to the Gryffindor common room appeared before 90s Kid. He nodded to the others and opened the door, revealing the familiar grassy Quidditch field with its pointy towers and tall hooped poles. Linkara had intended to keep his determined expression throughout the entirety of this meeting, but once he realized that a flailing lounge singer was tied to the tallest Quidditch hoop, his confidence was dashed instantly.
“Harvey!” Linkara stared up in horror at the older man who was now un-blindfolded, but still gagged and very tightly bound to the uppermost part of the goalpost. Harvey was sweating terribly, his skin paler than it had ever been before, and he was keeping his eyes tightly shut as he tried to avoid looking down at the world spread out so far below him. He couldn’t keep his body from trembling, his soaking clothes no doubt making him even more uncomfortable. All four members of the team found themselves staring up at him in dismay.
“Oh dude, he’s up so high!” 90s Kid cried, looking almost as terrified as Linkara did. “We have to get him down!”
“He’ll be released in due time.”
Linkara uttered a soft growl when he heard her voice from behind him, and his fingers tightened around the quill case. He whirled around to face Elle, his previous determination returning, and said through grit teeth, “Give Harvey back. Right now.”
Elle looked up at Harvey and laughed, as though his suffering caused her amusement. “He doesn’t look as though he’s having a very fun time. If you want his suffering to end, you’ll hand over what I desire post haste.”
Linkara stared at Elle, peering as deeply into her eyes as he could, trying to reason with her. “You have to understand that we’ve gone through hell trying to get this artifact. We’ve done things that have traumatized us and caused us immeasurable pain. All we want is to go home and recover from all the crap this damn world has put us through.”
“We don’t want Harvey to hurt anymore, he means so much to us,” 90s Kid begged. “Can’t you see that he’s totally cold and scared? Please, give him back to us!”
“Your words are touching, but the only thing I care about is that quill,” Elle replied, her eyes filling with a darkness that caused Linkara to recoil from her gaze. “I’m the one who has visited this wretched place time and time again, doing whatever was necessary to obtain the quill, but time and time again, it’s eluded my grasp. I don’t understand why, not when I’m the one who’s brought so many with me as offerings for every miserable trial this world throws at me - why did it reveal itself to you and not me?” Elle’s mask of ice melted away as a fiery rage twisted her features. “I’m the only one fit to be the true owner of that quill! Release it from your filthy hands! You don’t even understand this world, or the magic required to navigate it, let alone what that weapon is capable of!”
90s Kid let out a soft whimper, taking a step backwards, and in an instant, Elle’s rage was gone, the mask of cool composure sliding back into place. She offered Linkara another hollow smile. “So then, if you’d like to have Grandpa back unharmed, you’ll hand my quill over. Unless you’d like me to undo his binds and watch as he plunges to his demise.” Elle snapped her fingers and the ropes around the singer loosened slightly, causing Harvey to slowly slide down the pole, his eyes growing wide with fear.
“N-no!” 90s Kid cried, and Linkara hung his head, clenching his hands so tightly against the box that his fingers grew white.
“After all we’ve gone through to get this...” Linkara sighed and nodded his head in surrender. “Fine, it’s yours.”
“Nnnn! Mmmf! Nnnn!”
Muffled screams rained down from high above, coupled with pitiful shakes of Harvey’s head, but Linkara did his best to ignore them.
“I’m sorry, Harvey,” he murmured, holding out the box in defeat. “But a world without you just isn’t worth saving...”
Elle chuckled darkly as she accepted the box, clutching it tightly with her long, painted nails. “I knew your feelings for your teammates would be your undoing. The strongest teams are created by those willing to make sacrifices for the greater good.”
“Do you honestly think a lecture is what we need right now?” Linksano snapped, staring venomously at the woman.
“I can think of a number of things you need, but I’ll spare you for now.” Elle traced her fingers over the cool wood of the case before turning her back to the team, flaunting how confident she felt in their lack of ability to take action against her. “Go ahead; rescue the poor old fool before his fear causes him to become incontinent as well as nauseous.”
90s Kid snarled and clenched his hands, wanting nothing more than to aim his BFG at her, but a quick glance from Linkara caused him instead to swallow his anger and nod. He understood very well what they needed to do.
*So, you will release Harvey?* Ninja asked.
Somehow, Elle saw his card without turning around. “There are a number of brooms lying about this place. Go ahead and fly up to him if you want. Or leave him. I really don’t care.”
Linkara once again resisted the urge to pull out his trusted partner, and instead reached down to the ground, grabbing a shiny Firebolt. “Come on, guys. We can’t leave Harvey any longer.” The others nodded and soon were following Linkara through the air on broomsticks of their own as they headed toward the highest goalpost.
Unfortunately they were all forced to scatter from their single-file formation once an assortment of items started to fly at them from every direction. Instead of being tormented by Bludgers visible only to 90s Kid, this time the four were attacked by highly visible, and highly dangerous, items. 90s Kid yelped as a bullet grazed his shoulder, while Linksano squealed and swooped wildly to avoid being hit by several daggers. Ninja at once went to work sending out kunai and shuriken to disrupt the flights of the attacking weapons, while Linkara cursed and cast as many shielding spells as he could remember.
“Damn it all! I thought you said we could have Harvey if we traded!” he cried out to Elle angrily.
“Of course, he’s all yours!” Elle cried, laughing loudly at their screams. “I just thought this type of rescue attempt would be much more fun!”
“Don’t let any of this stop you! We have to get to Harvey!” Linkara shouted. “Stay close to me so I can shield you!” Linkara continued shouting out magic spells to protect them as they flew, while Ninja wielded every weapon he had in his armory.
90s Kid’s skillful flying caused him to be the first one to reach Harvey and he zoomed behind him to start untying his ropes. “Don’t worry, Dad, I’ve got you,” he murmured, hoping to reassure Harvey that things would be alright.
Linkara approached next, welcoming Harvey’s heavy, wet, trembling body onto his broomstick and into his arms. Harvey was looking much the worse for wear as he clung to Linkara for dear life, his body cold and clothes still dripping water.
“How c-c-c-could you do that, K-K-Kid?” he asked between chattering teeth. Though his eyes held exhaustion, disappointment and dismay also lurked within. “You s-should have left m-m-me. What happened to p-p-putting the m-mission first? To p-putting the world first?”
Linkara shot him a confident smile, his arms tightening around Harvey’s body. “Do you really think I’d betray the whole world that easily, Harvey? You’ve forgotten one thing about me: even though I’m a hero, I’m not above fighting dirty.”
An ear-piercing shriek suddenly filled the sky, causing the team to look down. They watched as Elle threw off her cloak, revealing bare arms that were now covered in blood, words carved deep into her flesh. 90s Kid wore a smile of grim pleasure as she started howling at them.
“You’d better not tell lies.”
”Damn it! What is this?” Elle howled, clutching at her bleeding wounds desperately. “Come here!” She snapped and one of her hooded minions appeared, seemingly confused as the quill and a notepad were thrust into his hands. “Write something with this! If there is a protective spell on it, I need to see how it works!”
The minion reluctantly started writing with the quill before he hissed and dropped it to the ground, grabbing at the back of his now-bleeding hand. Elle roared and shot a bolt of black lightning from her hand directly at the quill, disintegrating it instantly, before turning her fury-filled face towards the team.
“What is this?! What have you done to me?! Where is the real quill?!”
It was Linkara’s turn to laugh darkly this time. “Well, Elle, I might just be a crappy novice when it comes to magic, but illusion spells are actually pretty easy to pull off. And I think I did a damn good job casting one on that torture quill from 90s Kid’s trial. Or maybe the one I cast on 90s Kid himself was better, since it allowed him to slip through this room without the high and mighty sorceress noticing a thing,” he added, chuckling when Elle let out another howl of rage.
“You’re right, I shouldn’t be so modest - both of those spells were amazing! Now, as for your last question…” Linkara opened his coat and touched the pocket where normally he stored his Magic Gun, but presently was storing something much more important. “I was going to hand the quill over to you fair and square, but then I thought that this type of deception would be much more fun!”
“Get them!” Elle shrieked, snapping her fingers so many times they began to emit smoke. A cascade of hooded figures appeared before her, bowed, and then took flight, not one needing a broomstick to stay aloft.
“Everyone touch some part of me!” Linkara barked, outstretching his arms so that the others could comply with his wishes.
“I-I never shoulda doubted you, Kid,” Harvey muttered, pressing his face against Linkara’s shoulder as he sagged against his broad back.
Linkara let out a small grin before he snapped, “Everyone holding on tight?”
“Yeah!”
*Affirmative.*
“For Tesla’s sake, get us out of here!”
Linkara nodded and quickly spoke the words that he’d first spoken what seemed to be a lifetime ago. The five men were enveloped in a bright, golden light before they vanished from the Aisles of Write at last.
-----
Ted rang the doorbell to Linkara’s apartment and only had to wait ten seconds before it was flung open and he was pulled into a tight embrace by Boffo.
“Oof!” Ted cried out in surprise before he tentatively hugged the clown back. “G-greetings my friend. I am also h-happy to see you...and also hoping to breathe again sometime soon.”
Boffo quickly pulled back and honked an apology but Ted smiled and brushed it off. He knew that Boffo craved touch as comfort and honestly Ted did as well, so he didn’t mind indulging him in this time of need.
Please come in, Ted!
“I certainly will! I-oh.” Ted looked more closely at Boffo’s clown nose, which was for some reason colored bright blue instead of red. “I hope you haven’t been feeling sad lately, Boffo,” he said, feeling a touch concerned.
Sad? Boffo looked puzzled for a moment until he realized that Ted was staring at his nose. Oh. No, I’m not sad, Ted. I simply switched my nose out for a different one to celebrate April Fool’s Day. He explained calmly.
“I see. How, um, comedic of you,” Ted replied, honestly not sure what to make of this joke.
Thanks. Boffo failed to notice Ted’s awkwardness and calmly led him into the living room.
“Greetings, Dan!” Ted said when he spotted the man. “I hope you’re ready for movie night because I brought some Kung-Fu classics, all of which happen to be from the 80s!”
Dan, who was still quite pale and much thinner than he’d been before 90s Kid left, looked up at Ted with a small smile. “Well hello, my friend. I’m glad to see you’re doing well. Thanks for bringing the movies tonight. I made some refreshments if you’re hungry.” Dan lifted a plate of churros from the coffee table and offered it to Ted. “I’ve run out of things to make from my regular cookbook, so Dolly bought me an international one.”
Ted took a bite of one and smiled. “Delicious. You are truly talented, Dan.”
Dan offered a weak smile in return and nibbled on a churro as well, soon coating his lips in white powder that he was slow to lick off. “Thanks, my friend. Tomorrow, I’m going to try baumkuchen.”
I’m sure it will be as delicious as these churros are. Boffo said as he sat down on the couch beside the other man and reached for one as well. Ted observed the two as they silently munched their churros, noting that they both still seemed rather subdued, and felt the desire to help his friends feel better grow stronger within him.
Ted knew that Dan and Boffo were still doing the best they could to deal with their loneliness, though there had been a few rough patches here and there. Dan had started going to NA meetings again, but he still sometimes called Ted on his cell phone in the middle of the night, needing to be reassured that it couldn’t be much longer until 90s Kid was home, since he had never been apart from him this long before. It usually took about an hour to get Dan settled down, but at least Ted was sure that Dan wasn’t sneaking off to buy drugs again, which was a very good sign.
Boffo was putting on the braver face, as he always did, but Ted noticed times where Boffo needed to excuse himself from the room abruptly whenever he brought up Linksano’s name (and the poor thing mentioned his name quite often). When he came back, Boffo was always smiling, but Ted could see the added makeup around his eyes. At least Boffo still ate well and worked out regularly, so he appeared outwardly healthy if nothing else.
As for Ted, he was doing much better after receiving the message from Ninja. Being reminded of Ninja’s love and the fact that he was safe helped him rest easier than he had been since the dancer’s departure, and sometimes if he focused really hard, he could feel Ninja’s strong arms around him as he laid in bed. This always gave Ted an added boost of confidence and pep, and so he decided to use his positive energy to cheer up his friends, since he didn’t think he could take the strained, brittle smiles of Boffo and Dan any longer.
“Actually, we seem to have been watching many movies lately,” Ted said, placing the VHS boxes down. “What do you say we play a game? That would be a fun way to spend an afternoon, don’t you think?”
“A game?” Dan repeated, looking surprised. “I haven’t played any games since Kid left...I don’t even know if I remember the rules to anything.” He gave a short, rough laugh that sounded odd, but Ted would not be rebuffed so easily.
“Well, that won’t do at all, Dan. What will Kid say when he comes home and wants to engage you in a round of Punch-Out!! one evening?”
Dan suddenly looked distraught. “Do you think Kid will be mad? I would never want to make him mad, or-or sad, not ever!”
“No, no of course not,” Ted quickly corrected, mentally kicking himself for forgetting how fragile Dan was. “90s Kid would never be mad or sad because of you, Dan! But he’d certainly have a lot more fun if your skills were sharp enough to give him a real challenge, don’t you think?”
“Oh.” Dan nodded, taking Ted’s words to heart. “You’re right. I want Kid to have fun with me w-when he comes back. Yeah. Yeah, you’re right, you’re right.” Dan smiled then, a truly warm smile this time. “So, what should we play, Ted?”
“Why don’t we ask Boffo?” Ted suggested, turning toward the clown then. “You always know lots of fun games to play with the kids at the hospital, right?”
Boffo couldn’t help looking happier as he thought of the children he loved so dearly. Yes, we do have fun together. I’m not sure if either of you would enjoy our games though...
“Oh, I don’t think that’s true at all,” Ted continued, placing a hand on Boffo’s shoulder and squeezing it gently. “You’re a creative and fun-loving guy, Boffo. You’re also better at figuring out what we need more than we are sometimes,” he admitted with a chuckle. “So please, Boffo, think about what kind of game Dan and I need to play tonight.”
Boffo looked surprised by these words, but his cheeks were slightly tinted red with happiness, letting Ted know that he’d been successful at last. Well, let’s see...oh, I know. Sometimes, when Pollo and I are at the base by ourselves, we pretend we run a detective agency. Boffo’s cheeks tinted a bit darker but he was smiling widely now. I know it sounds a bit silly to think of a clown and a robot as detectives-
“Silly? Are you kidding?” Dan cut in. “That sounds like the premise for the best buddy cop show ever! Oh, after Miami Vice of course.”
Really? Boffo asked, and when Dan nodded, he pulled the other man into a hug as well.
Ted was rather confused at Boffo’s choice of game, as he was not really a fan of buddy cop shows, but it was enough to get the scared puppy dog look out of both their eyes for once, so Ted was going to indulge them as much as he could. “Well then, where is your robot partner?”
“Right here,” Pollo announced, floating into the room wearing a suit and tie and makeshift detective’s badge, which Ted tried very hard not to find hilarious. Boffo reached into his coat and pulled out a badge as well, which upon closer inspection read: Boffo and Pollo - Detectives and Accountants at Large.
We’ll need to make badges for you two as well; you can be our honorary agents. Boffo honked, already feeling better now that he was getting into one of his favorite games.
“I wish I’d brought my favorite side holster,” Dan asked, remembering his full Sonny Crockett costume at Dolly’s house. “Ooh, but before we make badges, there’s a special skill that all agents should know, Boffo.”
What is that? Boffo asked, instantly alert and pleased to see Dan getting into the game to this degree.
“Follow me!” Dan surprised them by exiting the apartment and going down the stairs that led to the parking lot. Boffo, Pollo, and Ted trailed along behind him, watching as Dan walked over to his car. “Now watch this!” Dan backed up before charging at his car, jumping up, and smoothly gliding over the hood. Unfortunately his landing wasn’t quite as smooth and he stumbled a bit across the blacktop. “Whoa, I might be a little out of practice,” he murmured, straightening his glasses and feeling a tiny bit embarrassed about having just done that. Dan’s discomfiture faded quickly though when he saw Boffo jumping up and down, clapping joyfully.
That was wonderful! Let me try!
As Boffo and Dan spent time sliding across the top of his car and giggling like children, Pollo went to work creating the new badges for the honorary detectives, and Ted set off to hide some suspicious pieces of evidence for the detectives to find once the investigation began. Even though he felt a bit foolish climbing trees to plant false moustaches and digging holes to bury pieces of jewelry, Ted also felt heartened by the excited shouts and honks of his companions. If he had to endure a little dirt on his robes or a few knee burns to keep everyone smiling until their loved ones returned, then Ted would become the best martial artist/honorary detective the world had ever seen.
While the four were busy running around outside, Nimue sent out an alert signal from inside the base.
“Warning: a transmission will occur inside this apartment building within the next twenty-four hours. Preparations for the acceptance of this transmission will now begin.”