lots of back and forth

[bohemianbanshee]

I left for home convinced that I should withdraw from my program and try to get into a ph.d. program at home. After an incredibly positive meeting with my advisors, I've gone back and forth about what I should do. Some days I've been totally convinced I should stay, other days I've been convinced I should leave in January. First off, my advisors

Comments

[bronzino]

damn.. I'm not sure if it's accurate but I'm getting the feeling that you want to stay in Scotland but that is a huge amount of money, plus your bf is in the US.. really can't rationally be justified.

I looked up Arlington and seems like it's 40mins from Dallas which I remember you mentioned had friends in.. Dallas has a good airport too.

[bohemianbanshee]

It's funny that you're getting that vibe. I actually would way rather go home, but am trying to make myself feel better about throwing away the opportunity to finish in a year, or two at most.

[bronzino]

oh, that is weird! Oops. I guess I didn't read it closely enough and missed out that it would actually take several years in the US. OK, that does suck. Guh, it seems like a no-win situation - either way more time or way more money..

[bohemianbanshee]

Yep, that's the problem. Going back seems preferable in basically every way except for taking way longer.

[bronzino]

How many years though? It helps that it would be free... Is it something that could be done while doing other things like work or getting on with your life? Is it worth it, would it be very unpleasant?

[bohemianbanshee]

It's hard to say. I've already done so much research and writing on the topic, so I don't think it would take me the usual 6 years they estimate for those who are starting from scratch, and especially considering the pace I've been working at this year. Like I said, I've already written the equivalent of half a ph.d. dissertation since January

[bronzino]

It does seem awfully strange that a phd would take so much longer in the US if the dissertation wouldn't be a lot different. If your family friend could do it in 2 years, surely you could.. let's hope that's possible..

[bohemianbanshee]

I hope I can. I know a big difference is that here a ph.d. student simply works on the research and dissertation, meets with his/her advisors for guidance on that, and takes a few one-day workshops. In the US they put them through more intensive taught courses, teacher training/internships, plus the research and dissertation.

Another thought I had last night is that I haven't been admitted to any US ph.d. programs, while I'm already admitted here. What if I couldn't get in? I'd still have two masters degrees without the hugely increased debt, but not sure how good a trade off that would be. Hmm. It's a difficult decision, however you look at it.

[bohemianbanshee]

I think it would be a good trade off, actually. It isn't like I was ever staking my life on getting a ph.d. or some university position.

[bronzino]

Don't fall into the trap of staying in Scotland to accumulate even more debt just because you've already paid so much work and money towards it; cut losses and see the experience in itself as a great life experience and change.

[bohemianbanshee]

Right. The amount of money I've paid makes me lean more towards leaving to cut costs, actually. It is the work and opportunity to complete it sooner that's hard to give up, plus the fact that I'm already approved to go forward here, whereas I haven't been admitted in the US.

[bohemianbanshee]

But all things considered, it does look like going home is the better option.

[bronzino]

I agree. I think it's just way too much money and disruption for your personal life (bf, cats, etc) without much of a payoff at the end. I'd suggest not being afraid of this potential of walking away from a PhD either (because it takes too long in the US); it's great but very overvalued in a way just to be an editor and you don't appear to want to be a lecturer either. The research could independently be put in a book.

[bohemianbanshee]

That's the conclusion I keep coming back to. I do think you're right, too, that ph.d.'s are overvalued and not all that important for anything but a university career. While I would certainly consider university employment, it isn't my goal or anything I'm longing for.

[bronzino]

Yeah, that's pretty much the only real logical conclusion of it. Many people like the process of it and/or the prestige of it though.

[bohemianbanshee]

Eh, I don't care about the prestige. I kind of dislike it, even, truth be told. I don't like the idea of being called Dr. Austin. Yuck. Can't really see how the process has any strong meaning for me either, if you mean the whole struggling through grad school thing.