"bob, ralph, and fred."
so, what better way to explain my frustration and bad luck/choices when it comes to boys than in a poem!
bob, ralph and fred.
to choose, i'd rather be dead.
for each one is treasered
beyond all measures
i'll do what is better
stay single forever
haha, then end.
ok....now the actual blogging begins (you can ignore this part)
"bob"-amazing. brilliant. charming. would love to spend my life with him. knowing that he'd be an amzing father and husband always sits well in my mind. but knowing that he's always an option, that i'll always wonder what could have been will bother me until i find some new.
"ralph"-cute. very charming. funny. if only he could see me as more than just one of the guys, that would be great. but i honestly dont think he'll ever see me in the lime light. it's always great to think about how awsome he would influence my life in a positive way, but at the same time i know its never gonna happen. but it doesnt hurt to dream.
"fred"-the most logical choice. smart. maybe too smart. dont know if it would actually work, but it could never hurt to try. or could it? i have a great time with him. we laugh, a lot. i think thats important. but i also think it could become annoying somewhere down the road. so we'll see.
(ok, you can pay attention again)
[rex made a good point (infact, he made several) in our early morning on-line conversation. here are some highlights:]
"its all about trust. Do u trust he will do it? do u trust that his timing is right? If so, then relax, its under control, not your, even better, Gods. If only we can trust God enough to just relax"
"but...the Lord's will be done. If you and ..3 are to be together, by the Lords it will happen. Pray about it, if the Lord brings you to it he'l bring you through it."
"but is life about simplicity, or is it about using what God has laid before us to learn about and glorify Him. If you would like to start a relationship with him, wouldnt it mean more if you were willing to take a risk for him? If i tell you, i eliminate all of your risk of exposing yourself to him and being hurt. Is it possible that God could use this for something like a foundation for a relationship, or maybe a lesson to be taught, or maybe just a way for him to show you that He is your only need? whatever it is, i believe God has put it here so that you will have to put ur trust in him"
"i do not want to tell you what to do, and i dont even know why im talking to you about this cuz im an idiot, and a guy too, (did i just repeat myself), but maybe instead of looking toward another to ease this pain, maybe you should hold onto the Lord and seek him, and after he delivers you from this pain and burden, (or doesnt, if it is his will for you to love this ..1 ) you will be ready to really give you heart to another?"
[it all came down to me needing to pray about the situation and not having to worry about it so much. if it's God's will to happen, it'll happen. if not, i'm not gonna lose any sleep over it.]
bob, ralph and fred.
to choose, i'd rather be dead.
for each one is treasered
beyond all measures
i'll do what is better
stay single forever
haha, then end.
ok....now the actual blogging begins (you can ignore this part)
"bob"-amazing. brilliant. charming. would love to spend my life with him. knowing that he'd be an amzing father and husband always sits well in my mind. but knowing that he's always an option, that i'll always wonder what could have been will bother me until i find some new.
"ralph"-cute. very charming. funny. if only he could see me as more than just one of the guys, that would be great. but i honestly dont think he'll ever see me in the lime light. it's always great to think about how awsome he would influence my life in a positive way, but at the same time i know its never gonna happen. but it doesnt hurt to dream.
"fred"-the most logical choice. smart. maybe too smart. dont know if it would actually work, but it could never hurt to try. or could it? i have a great time with him. we laugh, a lot. i think thats important. but i also think it could become annoying somewhere down the road. so we'll see.
(ok, you can pay attention again)
[rex made a good point (infact, he made several) in our early morning on-line conversation. here are some highlights:]
"its all about trust. Do u trust he will do it? do u trust that his timing is right? If so, then relax, its under control, not your, even better, Gods. If only we can trust God enough to just relax"
"but...the Lord's will be done. If you and ..3 are to be together, by the Lords it will happen. Pray about it, if the Lord brings you to it he'l bring you through it."
"but is life about simplicity, or is it about using what God has laid before us to learn about and glorify Him. If you would like to start a relationship with him, wouldnt it mean more if you were willing to take a risk for him? If i tell you, i eliminate all of your risk of exposing yourself to him and being hurt. Is it possible that God could use this for something like a foundation for a relationship, or maybe a lesson to be taught, or maybe just a way for him to show you that He is your only need? whatever it is, i believe God has put it here so that you will have to put ur trust in him"
"i do not want to tell you what to do, and i dont even know why im talking to you about this cuz im an idiot, and a guy too, (did i just repeat myself), but maybe instead of looking toward another to ease this pain, maybe you should hold onto the Lord and seek him, and after he delivers you from this pain and burden, (or doesnt, if it is his will for you to love this ..1 ) you will be ready to really give you heart to another?"
[it all came down to me needing to pray about the situation and not having to worry about it so much. if it's God's will to happen, it'll happen. if not, i'm not gonna lose any sleep over it.]