Random thoughts
Today is calmer, yesterday I was all angsty and aggressive.
The baby is apparently a soccer star and I have to pee just about every hour now.
Good times.
Monday is my next appointment with the midwife. I have several questions for her. . .mostly about what I can and can’t do. My hair is driving me insane. I haven’t had it done since before I lost the twins back in April, let me just say .. . .I have wicked growth and I hate my roots.
I’m all for not being able to do the permanent hair dye, but can I do henna?? Ugh, I feel so ugly. :(
More importantly. . . swine flu. They are encouraging pregnant women to get the shot. Ugh. So I need to ask if I should get the vaccination this fall. I am not expecting to hear the heartbeat, I haven’t heard any of them, so I will rely on the kicking that things are going smoothly. I want to make sure I can birth in any position I would like, I DO NOT want to be stuck on my back pushing in vain.
I’m actually starting to feel like a normal pregnancy, which could be a bad thing . . .as soon as I relax something happens . . . so. . cancel that. . .I’m all worried. Actually I am . . I got a little scared because three of three (the baby) wasn’t as active as it’s been . . .and well. . I guess part of me is always surprised (in a good way) that I don’t see blood when I pee.
It’s like I look at the tissue and I’m shocked it’s not there, because it always was.
That’s really fucked up; I know it is, but having the rug pulled out from under you so often, well you kinda come to expect something to go wrong. Don’t get me wrong here I’m positive about the pregnancy, but there is this one part of me who is terrified the second I enjoy it and celebrate it fully. . .
“SUCKER!!!”
On a more positive note we are thinking about a babymoon. Just getting away for a weekend soon, nothing far, DC, the shore, mountains, one of those. Lou has never been to DC so it would be cool to walk threw the museums as an adult and actually enjoy them all grown up like J
Eh, who knows. I wouldn’t mind going to the Poconos and soaking in a private pool all weekend either.
The baby is apparently a soccer star and I have to pee just about every hour now.
Good times.
Monday is my next appointment with the midwife. I have several questions for her. . .mostly about what I can and can’t do. My hair is driving me insane. I haven’t had it done since before I lost the twins back in April, let me just say .. . .I have wicked growth and I hate my roots.
I’m all for not being able to do the permanent hair dye, but can I do henna?? Ugh, I feel so ugly. :(
More importantly. . . swine flu. They are encouraging pregnant women to get the shot. Ugh. So I need to ask if I should get the vaccination this fall. I am not expecting to hear the heartbeat, I haven’t heard any of them, so I will rely on the kicking that things are going smoothly. I want to make sure I can birth in any position I would like, I DO NOT want to be stuck on my back pushing in vain.
I’m actually starting to feel like a normal pregnancy, which could be a bad thing . . .as soon as I relax something happens . . . so. . cancel that. . .I’m all worried. Actually I am . . I got a little scared because three of three (the baby) wasn’t as active as it’s been . . .and well. . I guess part of me is always surprised (in a good way) that I don’t see blood when I pee.
It’s like I look at the tissue and I’m shocked it’s not there, because it always was.
That’s really fucked up; I know it is, but having the rug pulled out from under you so often, well you kinda come to expect something to go wrong. Don’t get me wrong here I’m positive about the pregnancy, but there is this one part of me who is terrified the second I enjoy it and celebrate it fully. . .
“SUCKER!!!”
On a more positive note we are thinking about a babymoon. Just getting away for a weekend soon, nothing far, DC, the shore, mountains, one of those. Lou has never been to DC so it would be cool to walk threw the museums as an adult and actually enjoy them all grown up like J
Eh, who knows. I wouldn’t mind going to the Poconos and soaking in a private pool all weekend either.