The Prayer Warrior: TEG (Chapter 9)

Jul 15, 2012 15:57

This chapter is... Well, it's ridiculous. That's all I have to say on the matter. Onwards.
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Chapter 9: Chapter 9
You hacker will bun in hell for eternal life for you have sinned against God. And to claim that it was all a lie is also a sin. You will be punished for surely, for I am for real! I am a prophet of the lord, and I will get my own way!

Bluesunnyday: Wait, wait wait. YOU'RE A PROPHET?!? No. No you are not. Your ego is getting out of hand.

You are not who you say you are, and however dare you call yourself a real believer in Christ! A hacker is only been sent by Stan as a lie to make me look like a fool, but I same not a fool, but it is you that is a fool for hacking my account in the first place. You a will be surveying in the flames of the eternal claims of hell! You dare take me on when I have Dog on my seed!

Bluesunnyday: You have DOG on your SEED?!? DO>

I am a protest of the lord and his give my power above all you you. Donut dare take me on again, for hacking is a sin, and will be punished as such.
"And number eleven is in face number seven, so said the lord on his holy day of death. Didn't I tell you how much of a fool you will be if you say such evil things to the lord and his holey son of Christ, Jesus our saviour, lord protector of all!" Jerry told his followers. And than he whinnies baked top his church, in which he wet and faced his traitor. And it was none of other than Micheal that stood at the gates.
Bluesunnyday: Holy shit, this is just incomprehensible dreck now.

"You are too late! For it was Percy Jackson that made your wife pregnant! She is the traitor. So what mystic should we do to this creel women of a whore!" he assed me.
"And I told him" take her to the tallest tower, and throw her from there, and if she is not dead, stone her to death. And if that does not work, remove the head, like I did to Grover in the epic battle the first chapter, and if you have not read that, go back and read it, or sleep you will go to hell! Beware of my warring!
Bluesunnyday: What?!? WHAT?!?!?!?!!!?!!?!?!? WHAT THE MOTHERFUCKING FUCK?!??!!? WHAT ABOUT PERCY JACKSON?!?! WHAT ABOUT HIM?!? WAIT, NO, I SHOULDN'T BE ASKING THAT! IN FACT, HE... No, don't spoil it... They need to see the bullshit for themselves...

And so Michael took her and killed her, along with the baby, who was Percy Jacksons son! And so we had prayers. And then came Percy Jackson yelling "How dare you kill me wife"
Bluesunnyday: Wut?

"And I replayed," it was not your wife in the first pplace. So be gone from this site, or else I will have to deform you! Stan has lisped to you! Now you must realise your mistake, or I will be forced to remove you head just like I have done to my wire, who claimed to be a virgin bit was only a whore!
Bluesunnyday: Yes, because your girlfriend sleeping with another guy makes her a who- Actually, he MIGHT have a MINOR point there. VERY FUCKING MINOR.

"No, will not submit at all!" yelled Percy Jaqson.
So we battled with swords, on the top of the roof of the building, for we had agreed for the battle to be taken place there, for it was a goofy site for all of my followers to see my victory.

Bluesunnyday: What, was it the Holy Church of Bozo or something?

But my sword let go from my hand and it dropped to the ground. I tied to pick it up, but I could not. Percy Jackson was a better fighter than me. So I prayed to God that he would have mercy on me, and on Percy Jackson, for he had only been following orders from Satan himself.
Bluesunnyday: Oh, right, now that you're sure that you're gonna lose, NOW you want him to see the light. Way to fucking go, you hypocritical piece of SHIT!

And Percy Jackson dropped his sword and realised something. He had seen the lord himself. "I will never worship a false god ever again. Satan, Zeus who climbed to be my father is only a lie.

Bluesunnyday: That's POSEIDON dipshit.

My father is now God and his only eternal son Jesus Christ! Behold I convert to your way."
Bluesunnyday: Well that was easy.

And so a baptized Percy Jackson, who renamed himself Percy of Christ, and we had many hours of prayer, along with Mary, who survived the stoning, who I had forgiven.

Bluesunnyday: So what, is she like Grover or something? I'm pretty sure that you also beheaded her, soooo...

And we plotted the attack on Satan and his false gods. And now we had the knowledge of Percy of Christ. Amen.
Bluesunnyday: That word you are using... I do not think it means what you think it means.

See, people can become followers of Chris. And now Perch of Christ will be saved and taken to the eternal clowns of heaven! Amen and amen.

Bluesunnyday: The eternal CLOWNS of heaven?!? Please excuse me, I need to go laugh forever.

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Jesus, this is getting ridiculous. I'm serious, this guy is starting to scare me.
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