Man cleared of charges after driving three miles with a huge angry bastard on the bonnet of his car.

It's the final little detail that really tickled me:

Regarding the Staffordshire bull terrier, Philip Quirey admitted he and his nephew happened to have one in the car boot, but "denied this was to intimidate the defendant". He claimed the pickaxe ( Read more... )

There isn't much work going on at work today, and I'm currently killing the hours by reading textsfromlastnight.com, where I found this beauty:

(218): you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment
on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"