(no subject)
I am an island of desolation eveloped by a sea of beauty.
On the winding roads
between Batesville
and Conway, I felt a part of me perish.
I do not know
what
exactly, but I feel
that it was the passing of my
childhood
and the end of
beauty
within me.
I mourned the death of my youth today.
I can feel it. I can feel myself slip through my fingers as though I was holding on to my own child as it were being ripped out of my arms.
Is this what it's supposed to feel like? This "aging" and "maturing"?
If beauty once existed
within me, -then it has deserted
me. I no longer see
within myself a beacon of love
and passion, I
only feel a crater of
emptiness
where the beacon once stood.
I feel
so
empty.
I want desparately to fight the realization of my greatest fear:
loss of adventure and the loss of my inner child.
I'm only
21
years old,
why do I feel this way???
Only time will tell.
Many thoughts and emotions dwell within my soul. One thing I have pondered is how cruel it is for something as dually beautiful and cursed as humans to live such a short life. It is so perplexing, the idea of death. So perplexing to be surrounded by an immortal earth that will not mourn our passing. Yet I love the earth with such fervor that it paralyzes me with melancholy. I can feel the earth within me. I can feel its oceans run through my veins and I can hear its wind serenade my soul.
So strange that I will perish, yet, within me there is something immortal. Something that will never cease to thrive.
Can it be?
Can it be that I feel my soul???
I don't know.
Shall I ever know?,
-Only time will tell.
I am a pool of nothingness cradled by a vale of abundance.
On the winding roads
between Batesville
and Conway, I felt a part of me perish.
I do not know
what
exactly, but I feel
that it was the passing of my
childhood
and the end of
beauty
within me.
I mourned the death of my youth today.
I can feel it. I can feel myself slip through my fingers as though I was holding on to my own child as it were being ripped out of my arms.
Is this what it's supposed to feel like? This "aging" and "maturing"?
If beauty once existed
within me, -then it has deserted
me. I no longer see
within myself a beacon of love
and passion, I
only feel a crater of
emptiness
where the beacon once stood.
I feel
so
empty.
I want desparately to fight the realization of my greatest fear:
loss of adventure and the loss of my inner child.
I'm only
21
years old,
why do I feel this way???
Only time will tell.
Many thoughts and emotions dwell within my soul. One thing I have pondered is how cruel it is for something as dually beautiful and cursed as humans to live such a short life. It is so perplexing, the idea of death. So perplexing to be surrounded by an immortal earth that will not mourn our passing. Yet I love the earth with such fervor that it paralyzes me with melancholy. I can feel the earth within me. I can feel its oceans run through my veins and I can hear its wind serenade my soul.
So strange that I will perish, yet, within me there is something immortal. Something that will never cease to thrive.
Can it be?
Can it be that I feel my soul???
I don't know.
Shall I ever know?,
-Only time will tell.
I am a pool of nothingness cradled by a vale of abundance.