if you don't want me to go say, "stick around."
You know when you reach that point and you're just... done? Like whatever the situation is, you've reached your limit and you're not going to tolerate it anymore. So you do something drastic, or subtle, but either way it's final.
I felt like this once before, with the very same person. And so, even though I talked to her every single day, I stopped. I didn't call, I didn't chat, I didn't email. I stopped all communication with this person. It took her two weeks to even realize that she hadn't heard from me, and the following two weeks I only got two voicemails wondering why I wouldn't call her back. I went an entire month and didn't speak to my own mother. Why? Because I wanted attention. I shouldn't have had to ask or demand her attention, but I did. After a month I caved and called her back. I said some hurtful things which didn't seem to affect her at all, and let her know that this was a two-way road and she needed to make an effort sometimes.
I think maybe she did. For a couple weeks. But then she went right back to being wrapped up in her own life. This fantasy world she lives in where she doesn't have three children and the only responsibilties she has are herself and her boyfriend.
So, fuck it. I'm there again. I'm done. I don't want to feel like a burden every time I call, or wonder if you'll snap at me when you answer the phone. When I'm telling you my exciting news of the day, I don't want to hear your deadpan voice and wonder if you've heard what I said, much less wonder whether or not you even care. I don't want to feel like I'm intruding when I come to your house because I don't know what's yours and what's his. I definitely don't want to feel that emptiness every time I hang up the phone, like all the words spilling out of my mouth left me hollow and you didn't care enough to fill that hole with words of your own. I just don't want to cry, or care, anymore.
Done.