there is no ph in fling.
Today was great. I got pleasantly high with Meredyth and her very cool and hot cousin, Sophie. Then I called steph and we went to the storm cafe, (wonderful restaurant in town, if you ever come to middlebury i will take you there...chris knows what I am talking about). We rented a *free* movie, kill bill pt two. Great, but not as engaging as the first one...and vaugely anti-climatic. right after the movie ended, my highschool friends called me and invited me to a party at my friend will terry's grandparents house. (We party there when they are gone, we call it the crack house...very fun...also, Will is going to be at kenyon in the fall, he will be the tall attractive kid with no tollerance and a penchant for booting everywhere.)
Steph and i went to this party, not knowing what to expect. We walk in the door, spot two gorgeous grey shirted boys and proceeded to command their attention the entire time we are there. They were middlebury college students, but you cant expect perfection in vermont, so i guess we were letting it slide. Unfotunately, we had to leave before we all got down like we were supposed to. not that i like doing, or am good at, that wierd "i have never met you but lets make out" shit, but after a DRY SUMMER, it would have been nice to have a little hurrah. But we left, and they look deserted waving good bye to us.
ah well, somethings are not meant to be.
However, this party as tame as it was, (nothing, absolutely nothing like the kenyon madness...but then again what the fuck is?), reminded me of how much i actually do like being social, and around people who are older than 15 and younger than 45. And that is a good enough reason to have truely enjoyed myself tonight, hook up or not.
Although very little in my life is distressing at the moment, I must say that I am looking forward to Kenyon, (no shit!), but not looking forward to the 4 days i have to spend with my granparents before getting there.
the daily routine with them consists of:
eat
sit
eat
sit
eat
sleep
this is not ok with me.
especially when my entire being will be trembling out of control anticipating my return to kenyon. I will be 2 hours away with nothing to do but stare at the walls and be force fed manicotti and meatballs. They are good, i must say, but after the 60th one i feel like dying. My dad does not understand this at all, and so i get no sympathy and only a guilt trip about how i am a spoiled ungreatful shit. and maybe i am. i dont care, at this point i am just venting because there is nothing i can do about it.
there is also nothing to do about the fact that i did not hook up with one of the willing and ready grey shirted boys. I dont know why i just didnt stay, but i have always felt that if a potential hook up is the only reason you are staying at a party, it is best to just leave. that has been my experience. when i dont follow that rule, bad bad things happen. last semester happens. fuck last semester. fuck it.
I am typing at the speed of light at the moment, and i am not sure why. It just feels good to type right now. I am on my bed, my god's gift of a bed, with my comforters and just writing any useless shit that comes out of me. i dont care.
tomorrow is my last day of work at public safety. This makes me very sad indeed. I wish i could just transport my summer jobs to kenyon with me so i could make so great money doing things i love. It might lend me some structure and productivity to my life and maybe that would help my time management.
I worry about my school work this year because right now, when i think about school i think about the copious amounts of alcohol that will be drunk and the explosive feeling i will get when i see everyone again. Does this mean i will not do my work??? I cant let that happen. Please everyone, dont let me do that. If you find me asleep in the caples elevator, i beg of you, plan an intervention this time. dont just leave me there to wake up at 8 am and wonder how i became so tactless.
Although, I know I am exctited about seeing miriam again, and thanking her from the bottom of my heart for saving me last semester. she is such an inspiration to me. and professor rhodes, who makes me flutter with awe and eagerness to learn everything of the endless depths of his knowledge.
for some reason that last expression made me think of the most unnecessarily rediculous description of a roller coaster heard on TV yesterday, which i must share with the world:
"the 'wicked twister' took the new millenium and body slammed it into submission."
WHAT?
television.
great band, awful cultural phenomenon.
oh my.
this has been a very disjointed and chatty entry. hm.
i should go to bed.
gnight.
M
Steph and i went to this party, not knowing what to expect. We walk in the door, spot two gorgeous grey shirted boys and proceeded to command their attention the entire time we are there. They were middlebury college students, but you cant expect perfection in vermont, so i guess we were letting it slide. Unfotunately, we had to leave before we all got down like we were supposed to. not that i like doing, or am good at, that wierd "i have never met you but lets make out" shit, but after a DRY SUMMER, it would have been nice to have a little hurrah. But we left, and they look deserted waving good bye to us.
ah well, somethings are not meant to be.
However, this party as tame as it was, (nothing, absolutely nothing like the kenyon madness...but then again what the fuck is?), reminded me of how much i actually do like being social, and around people who are older than 15 and younger than 45. And that is a good enough reason to have truely enjoyed myself tonight, hook up or not.
Although very little in my life is distressing at the moment, I must say that I am looking forward to Kenyon, (no shit!), but not looking forward to the 4 days i have to spend with my granparents before getting there.
the daily routine with them consists of:
eat
sit
eat
sit
eat
sleep
this is not ok with me.
especially when my entire being will be trembling out of control anticipating my return to kenyon. I will be 2 hours away with nothing to do but stare at the walls and be force fed manicotti and meatballs. They are good, i must say, but after the 60th one i feel like dying. My dad does not understand this at all, and so i get no sympathy and only a guilt trip about how i am a spoiled ungreatful shit. and maybe i am. i dont care, at this point i am just venting because there is nothing i can do about it.
there is also nothing to do about the fact that i did not hook up with one of the willing and ready grey shirted boys. I dont know why i just didnt stay, but i have always felt that if a potential hook up is the only reason you are staying at a party, it is best to just leave. that has been my experience. when i dont follow that rule, bad bad things happen. last semester happens. fuck last semester. fuck it.
I am typing at the speed of light at the moment, and i am not sure why. It just feels good to type right now. I am on my bed, my god's gift of a bed, with my comforters and just writing any useless shit that comes out of me. i dont care.
tomorrow is my last day of work at public safety. This makes me very sad indeed. I wish i could just transport my summer jobs to kenyon with me so i could make so great money doing things i love. It might lend me some structure and productivity to my life and maybe that would help my time management.
I worry about my school work this year because right now, when i think about school i think about the copious amounts of alcohol that will be drunk and the explosive feeling i will get when i see everyone again. Does this mean i will not do my work??? I cant let that happen. Please everyone, dont let me do that. If you find me asleep in the caples elevator, i beg of you, plan an intervention this time. dont just leave me there to wake up at 8 am and wonder how i became so tactless.
Although, I know I am exctited about seeing miriam again, and thanking her from the bottom of my heart for saving me last semester. she is such an inspiration to me. and professor rhodes, who makes me flutter with awe and eagerness to learn everything of the endless depths of his knowledge.
for some reason that last expression made me think of the most unnecessarily rediculous description of a roller coaster heard on TV yesterday, which i must share with the world:
"the 'wicked twister' took the new millenium and body slammed it into submission."
WHAT?
television.
great band, awful cultural phenomenon.
oh my.
this has been a very disjointed and chatty entry. hm.
i should go to bed.
gnight.
M