(no subject)
man lately i just can't sleep. what is up with my insane way of living? am i a weird person?
while i am up i guess ill just blab. its not like anyone is listening or reading for that matter. well, i have been really bummed lately, and its not even so much about being broke, its about the fact that im moving
however, i am moving for a very good cause, to get a new car. but in all reality, i don't think i really want to leave this place. its so great and everyone is so friendly. its not like baton rouge where if you go out and get pushed accidently b/c it is crowded, someone wants to fight you. its more of, " excuse me im sorry" type of deal and i like that. im just really happy here. i love UL's campus and i love my classes, well with the exception of some, but most of all i just love lafayette. there are so many things to do (if you have money), and its so pretty here. i like having my own space. and the fact that if i want to not talk to anyone i can just sit and my room and be alone. without interruptions and chaotic randoms going on around me like at home. i like how when i want to study i can do it peacefully, no distractions.
i really don't think moving home will be that bad b/c nathan will be with me. well, at least i think he will be with me. I will finally get to feel again what it is like to see him everyday, share the same stories with each other, and above all have a real relationship with him again. I think that is what i stuggled with the most. It actually brought out a lot of rediculous fights between us. When a couple can't see each other, they tend to get aggetated and pick fights over random nothings. I can't wait to be with him everyday, maybe it will close all the little gaps we have in our relationship. We are doing very well right now, as most of the time, but i acutally went a little insane not to long ago about things between us. i attempted to brake it off permenantly with him b/c it drove me crazy that i told myself i would never let anyone treat me like he did for a while. it wasn't that bad, but it was more of like his attitude. I sooo do not know how to accumulate the words to let everyone know what im talking about. its hard. and if you read this, im not bashing you. just rambling b/c that is soo all i have to do right not. the point is, we talked everything out, he changed himself as well as i changed myself, now everything is peechie.
anyway, back to the good stuff. Nathan's place will be my place. it will be our place in a sense. ha. thats really gay. but seriously, i can do all the things i do here at his apt. so it shouldn't be that miserable. Anyway, back to my house. my parents do not have any restraints on me when i am home what-so-ever. they let me come and go as i please, no questions. is that bad? does that mean they don't care about me? haha, just kidding, i know they love me very much.
i kinda feel like patrick does about the whole moving home thing, except his decision is obviously tougher than mine. when i move home, i will have an awesome job and they will be more willing to give me money without hassel. right now they do undoubtably give me money, but i kinda feel bad doing it and they kind of put up a fight. its weird, but then again that is to be expected from parents.
yes i am finally getting tired. i knew the whole elle-jay rambling thing would do it. i knew i could count on it. it works everytime.
does she have a man
who works a 9 to 5
does he come home
to kiss our young sierra, tuck her in
and say goodnight?
and an extra kiss for mama...
i want that kiss, that kid, that apartment
i'm ready to settle down now
so get that man out of my bed
i want my daughter back now
i want to kiss her, tuck her in, and say, "goodnight, my baby girl"