(no subject)
UUUUUGGGGHHHHH! Why does it feel like I have NOTHING in common with any of my friends here! Dont take it personally,tonight I just feel rather sad and blah. I miss Tampa so so much. I dont give 2 shits about not supposedly giving it a fair shot here, because you can lead a horse to water, but you cant make him drink. I was led to the water, and the water tastes like feltch. I know I hated Tampa towards the end of while I was there, but i was thinking that MAYBE the grass would be greener, and on some levels it was,and some it wasnt. I know moving back to Tampa isnt going to be all roses and whatnot, but maybe Ill get lucky and instead of jsut weeds growing Ill luck out and get some of those pretty wild flowers you see growing along side the interstate just because thats where the wind blew them. Its a gamble,everything in life is a gamble-walking acorss the street,driving your car,not matter how near or far-hell even sometimes waking up is a gamble. I just feel like I have no control and thats the part that pisses me off more then anything I guess.
Have you wondered why someone likes you? I mean especially if seemingly you arent their type,atleast physically. Ive been thinking about this today. Is it something that can be overcome or compensated for? See it all correlates back to a gamble. UGH! FUCK! SHIT! sometimes a good catharsis can solve everything. Im due for one sometime here soon. I spose I could numb it and just pretend these thoughts didnt exist, but the joke would be on me at that point. I dunno, I guess im just scared. Im reeeealllllly realllly into this guy and Im so scared that hes going to be the first one to break my heart,which inevitably he will, but is sooner better then later? Ive alwats viewed my glass as half empty, pessimism seems to work best for me, the half full approach to me, is naive. Granted things DO happen which demonstrate optimism, but on a whole which is more prevalent. Who the fuck knows, I guess Ill go with the flow of things.
Have you wondered why someone likes you? I mean especially if seemingly you arent their type,atleast physically. Ive been thinking about this today. Is it something that can be overcome or compensated for? See it all correlates back to a gamble. UGH! FUCK! SHIT! sometimes a good catharsis can solve everything. Im due for one sometime here soon. I spose I could numb it and just pretend these thoughts didnt exist, but the joke would be on me at that point. I dunno, I guess im just scared. Im reeeealllllly realllly into this guy and Im so scared that hes going to be the first one to break my heart,which inevitably he will, but is sooner better then later? Ive alwats viewed my glass as half empty, pessimism seems to work best for me, the half full approach to me, is naive. Granted things DO happen which demonstrate optimism, but on a whole which is more prevalent. Who the fuck knows, I guess Ill go with the flow of things.