189: White Fire ~ AvaMcKenna
I have found that you-sues are a pain in the neck, so while I may go back and finish that one entry I've decided to hold off for now. If I am bored with the entries I'm posting, what can expect of the people reading this journal. I've decided to go ahead and post the Mary Sues that are on bleach_sues journal that still exist, something I've been planning for some time now.
Title: White Fire
Name: Kandace Akari
Suethor: AvaMcKenna
Pairings: Byakuya/Kandace
Stats: 12 Chapters, 21,028words, 54 reviews; average: 1750 words, 4.5 reviews
Rating:: Yachiru
Appearance: “Her midnight-black hair was a rat's nest at best, with random curls sticking out at haphazardly all over the place. She was unflatteringly clothed in what resembled cut up washrags that had been unskillfully sewn together. She was filthy from head to toe, with scratch marks on her palms and ankles and a scar that went down her left cheek. The only asset about her that wasn't appalling was her dark blue eyes; clever but they held a mysterious light to them.”
Background: She is a prisoner that has been taken in off the streets. Byakuya gets it into his head to tame this girl simple because he can't stand her behavior and he is OCD about fixing said behavior. It is kind of like the “Taming of the Shrew” from Shakespeare story wise.
Sue Qualifications: Other then the fact her name is Kandace and Byakuya's soul mate is stated in Bleach to be Hisana, nothing. Truth be told, this scenario is one of the few I see Byakuya getting together with someone other then Hisana.
Annoying Attributes: Here characterization, but thankfully the writer meant it to be this way. The prose is also pretty good. I'll also say this fanfic was recommended to me a long time ago by someone and even back then I was pretty impressed by what I saw.
Sample: (Chapter 1: Dificult)
"Hey," she called out, addressing me with rude informality,"You look pretty damn important to be hanging around a prison cell, you know."
I met her gaze coldly, expecting the girl to shrink back, the way that I was used to most people reacting to me. She did not. Her eyes held hints of defiance, as if I were somehow trespassing by standing in front of her prison cell.
"And your point is?" I said coolly, raising an eyebrow in contest. My words, however, only seemed to entertain her even more.
"Well," the girl suggested, smirking indignantly,"Maybe you should get on with your very important and powerful life instead of standing around here, staring at me." She was openly grinning now, but her eyes were careful. I glared down at her, sitting easily enough at the back of her cell. It had definitely been a long time since I had met someone with enough nerve to mock me the way that she had. Obviously, she hadn't the slightest idea who I was.
"Tch. Don't flatter yourself, girl," I said evenly, refusing to be put off by such an inconsequential street child,"I'm not here for you." The girl's eyebrows went up and she smirked, somehow looking shocked and amused all at once. Her mouth was open slightly as she stared at me, looking close to laughter.
"Well, you're a bit uptight aren't you?" She inquired insolently, sitting forward as if interested for the first time.
"I fail to see why it matters," I said, struggling to keep my vacant expression indifferent. There was definitely something wrong with this girl. I briefly wondered if she was mentally unstable or if she merely chose to act that way to annoy others. She threw her head back, laughing, her deep blue eyes sparkling with amusement.
"What?" I demanded sharply, letting a bit of my irritation seep through my normally perfectly composed facade. The prison gaurd had failed to mention that she was outright maddening to even be around.
"You're ridiculous, you are," She managed to get out in between fits of laughter. I said nothing, fully intent on uncovering some way of getting out of prison duty. At least until this senselessly irrational brat was gone. Renji was quite enough; I would no doubt go insane if I was forced to spend any amount of time with her for an entire month. There had to be some way to get out of it . . . She shook her head at me in disbelief, still grinning. "Didn't even deny it . . ." She muttered, sounding thoroughly entertained. I glared at the wretch.