Home
I think it's kinda weird that whenever I return home, I just have this
incredible and compelling notion to write, and this day is no
different. The trip was and interesting one, at best. The weather was
slightly against us the whole way back, whether it was the constant
wind, the falling snow, or those random ice patches under a bridge it
was a little rough around the edges, but our good driver made it back
with few complications, I'm glad the worst part of the trip was at the
very beginning. I ended up dozing off here and there throughout the
duration of the trip, never really falling completely asleep but enough
I guess. We made a pit stop in Minneapolis to retrieve some, oh so
delectable, White Castle Hamburgers, from which I received major gut
rot, not the best "road trip" food. I return home to open arms from my
family, which was quite nice. We did the whole catch up thing, told
about recent news and gossip and experiences, to where I proceeded to
retreat to my basement "layer" and watch the movie The Island, which is
quite a good movie if anyone is interested in seeing I recommend it. I
lay out on my comfy couch as I always do and not only watch the movie
but reflect, I know I'm weird because I reflect, well back off it's my
thing. And as I watch the movie and the two main characters, and I see
the relationship they have with each other and how much care and love
there is for one another and it just realize how alone everyone is in
this world, including me. I keep having these thoughts that I will not
end up with another companion in my life ever again, and to be fully
honest REALLY scares me. I remember what it was like to have that other
person, and the feelings you get from kissing, or holding hands, or
just sitting next to them, not saying a single word, but you can feel
their presence and it feels good. I guess all I'm trying to say is that
I'm afraid, I truly fear that I will go through this world alone, a
bachelor, single, call it what you will, it all means the same, solitude.
I don't want that to happen, but from the way things are going, it
looks like that's how it's going to be. I guess that's how it works
though, it's Karma, I ruined my last relationship, so I'm don't deserve
another.