Not Good
I have been sick since the weekend. This cold is dragging me down. I haven't been too crabby, but I am starting to. Three-fourths of my department is at 3 day training seminar, which leaves basically 3 of us to do all the work of the entire department. I'm a little sick of it, and it doesn't feel very fair. On top of that, Karrie was kind of sassy with me on Tuesday for no reason.
Jamie and I have decided not to get married. We've agreed that if she wants children, that she would need a real husband who can provide that for her. I neither want kids, nor would be able to help make them (unless we get some help). Plus what if either of us were to meet someone during our marriage? I feel it would tear us apart. She would begin to resent me if I didn't perform my duties as hubby and have sex with her. We shouldn't ruin a good friendship that way. We are incapable of being everything we truly want.
The truth is, I would like to fall in love. I haven't met anyone who would even be remotely interested in me. I think I would have a lot to offer someone. I am funny, creative, and have a broad range of interests. Sometimes, I feel so unlovable, because no one ever looks at me in a sexual way. I like to kiss, and there is no one to kiss. It is very, very sad.
Jamie and I have decided not to get married. We've agreed that if she wants children, that she would need a real husband who can provide that for her. I neither want kids, nor would be able to help make them (unless we get some help). Plus what if either of us were to meet someone during our marriage? I feel it would tear us apart. She would begin to resent me if I didn't perform my duties as hubby and have sex with her. We shouldn't ruin a good friendship that way. We are incapable of being everything we truly want.
The truth is, I would like to fall in love. I haven't met anyone who would even be remotely interested in me. I think I would have a lot to offer someone. I am funny, creative, and have a broad range of interests. Sometimes, I feel so unlovable, because no one ever looks at me in a sexual way. I like to kiss, and there is no one to kiss. It is very, very sad.