your still with me
i hate me. i hate the fact that i can't let peole know who the real me is, hell i don't know who the real me is. i hate the fact that i am so emotional. i hate the fact that i can't trust anybody. i hate the fact that when i get to a point where i can trust somebody i start becoming distant towards them and they have no idea what the hell is going on. im scared at the fact that i could end up alone and have nobody that loves me. i want everything to be like it was 4 months ago when i was happy and had everything going for me. i HATE letting go of things i love. i wish i could just do so many things over. i wish i didn't hurt you, and don't say that i didn't because i know i did. i wish things could be the same, but there not. i want so many things for so many people. i want a boyfriend. hell im lonely and i don't want to be lonely anymore. i don't deserve to be lonely. well maybe i am. maybe god wants me to be lonely because i did something wrong, but what did i do wrong? i have no idea. i want to cut so bad, i want to end all the pain and sadness and lonelyness and depression. i wanna be with you, but i can't. i want to run outside in the rain, but its not raining. i wanna tell everybody that i love that i love them, and always will. i wanna get away from this town forever and never come back. will you run away with me? i wanna make things right and not have any regrets. i wanna be happy and hyper and free from everything. i wanna be in love again. i want to be rememberd for how i acted, insted of what i wore. well maybe i won't be rememberd at all because of my attitude towards people. im trying my hardest to be a good person.. honestly i am. and all i really want is for you to admit that you were wrong and are willing to work things out