(no subject)
I wonder what my friends would think if I reposted this to myspace? (they'd freak)
Height?: 5'3"
Weight?: 116lbs! :)
Lowest Weight?: 95 lbs
Highest Weight?: 124 lbs
What weight do you want to weigh?: prob 103ish
What eating disorder do you have?: not really sure. def used to restrict pretty hard core. counted EVERY calorie. was a bit exercised obsessed... sometimes chew and spit. and very rarely purge
In Depth
How many calories do you eat in a day, on average?: used to... prob about 1,400. recently prob about 800
Do you throw up your food on occasion?: when I feel really really guilty. or if a craving for something will not go away i'll eat it with the intention of throwing it up. but I hate hate puking so I chew and spit.
Do you want to look like a supermodel/actress?: no just good
Are you in some sort of extracurricular sport, ie soccer or track?: no but I go to the gym.
Has anyone ever teased you about your weight?: someone called me fat in 5th grade, nickname was anorexic whore and bulimic bitch in high school. ex-bf was total ass and would make comments even when i was only 95...prick.
Have you ever fasted? If so, for how long?: hmm I think 2 days was the most.
Do you take laxatives to get rid of food/calories?: I used to take waaaaaay too many laxatives and then had to go on an Rx one because I ended up not really being able to go on my own. I get really constipated sometimes too.. I hate it. I try to stay away.
Are you 'inspired' by models/actresses?: anyone with the 'ideal' body
Have you ever been hospitalised for your ED?: no
Have you ever ingested Ipecac to induce vomiting?: nope.
Have you ever tried to recover from your eating disorder?: at some points i got really tired and frustrated with it. said i just wanted to be happy. the thoughts never go away.
Body Image Q's
Do you constantly see yourself as fat, even though others say you are not?: yes. I understand i'm not really really fat but for ME its fat... and plus comparing me to obese americans is not fair!
What part of your body would you change?: thinner thighs! get rid of love handles. i hate my arms. and cankles.
On a scale of 1-10, how happy are you with your body?: hmm4 or 5... maybe i dunno
Do you judge your value/merit solely on your weight/body?: not at all but my body is very important to me. if you are happy and eat what yo want then yo just become fat and miserable. when i'm at a low weight some things suck but i am generally pretty happy with myself :D
Because of your body apperance/weight, have you become severely depressed?:not severely but yeah depressed over it. lots of frustration
Do you constantly compare your bodies to supermodels/actresses?: not really, I like real people.
Health/Food
Do you think you eat healthy enough?: i think I eat ok. needs work
Are you morbidly afraid to eat carbs?: no, i think i love them. but i'm pretty sure bread makes me fat
Calories?: overestimate to be safe. years and years of calorie counting... i know my calories
Are you often tired/fatigued?: depends
Do you feel more energised after eating food?: when i'm in NEED...yes. when i'm not, then in makes me tired. also sometimes feeling empy makes me feel energized!
Do you eat meat?: fish, steak, grilled chicken
Do you eat your food in a certain way? out of cups! i guess its a portion control thing
Do people tell you you look sick or famished?: ha have been told, unfortunately not in a long time
Have you ever thrown up blood?: no
Is your heart bpm above 49?: yes
Do you have fainting spells from lack of eating?: no
Other Stuff
Do you think the media is at fault for the prevalence of eating disorders?: american yes
What's your opinion of Pro-Ana?: i think you should have the right to do what you want. i wouldnt wish this on anybody. i'm pro support :)
Do you have any other mental disorders? deeeeeepresssssion and apparently i'm a little borderline but not enough to treat. hmm
What's your favourite food to eat?: uhhh safe food or food in general? a good safe food is edamame. i never feel guilty but it has soy protein etc. other fave food? ANYTHING
Favourite drink?: wataaaaah
Do you often wish you didn't have an ED?: of course,but then i think i'd be fat!
Do you want to recover?: not if it means being fat