*sigh*
So this morning I wake up, with bite marks on my hand and a very grogginess. I'm ok, just still a little blurry about everything that happened last night. I know nothing bad happened except that i fucked up Andy's car, trying to start it at 2 in the morning and then the dog bit me before going to sleep... really hard, he broke the skin this time. I'm not sure what to do about it. Yeah, i feel badly about Andy's car too, but he didn't tell me what to do with it! I went to Steve's (different Steve from ex-Steve) apartment last night, did some laundry and ended up crying my eyes out by the end of the night. I thought i was ready to be with someone else, but i guess not. And he was really good about it. Anyway, then i came home got drunk for the second time last night, played some music with the boys, watched Collateral, and passed out with Rice. There's not really anything new in my life except that i'm leaving for Germany in a few weeks. I'm really excited but nervous and scared all at the same time. I feel like i'm just falling behind with everything again. The last entry I wrote was really bitter and angry, and I apologize. I would edit it, but then i would say that i was regretting what i said, and i don't believe in doing that. I said what i said, i was drunk, angry, sad, blah blah blah, I'm trying to improve, i'm taking my medicine and so forth. I do love all my friends, I just get frustrated sometimes, ya know? Anyway, i'm going to go try and clean up the house, and maybe allen will fix the washing machine. take care everyone