My Facial Hair Removal & 47 Female Hormonal Days So Far...
When I first embarked on my IPL laser hair removal on my face to be honest I was unsure how I would feel about the hair going off my face. One thought was that it had been there for so long and I was quite used to it. I wondered whether I would actually regret removing the hair from my face. I had my doubts.
Well, I have had three sessions so far and my forth is coming very soon. I wasn't fazed at all by the process of removing my hair, and it just felt like any other day in my life. I wasn't exactly rejoicing but I felt happy with the results. I would describe it as taking away a shroud from my face and seeing through.
The crunch came very recently when I started to have more normal hair growth again. Luckily my close friend reminded me that hair grew in 6 week cycles.
I was surprised to find that I was actually mortified with what was happening to my face. I felt so upset about my hair coming through. This is how I worked out that I don't have any regrets about my hair removal. I now know that it was something I need to do for my own wellbeing and happiness.
One thing that played on my mind a bit was how my laser hair removal therapist had asked me twice whether I wanted my whole beard removed. In a way I couldn't understand why she was asking me this because in my mind it felt perfectly normal to remove my facial hair.
Then I somehow imagined how another person would think about removing all the hair from their face. I then thought to myself that a man wouldn't want to remove his facial hair because it is part of his masculinity.
I can't wait until the day when I have no hair on my face. I will feel content and comfortable. I feel closer to how my internal self wants my external self to be.
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As I stated in the subject title of this post it has now been 47 days since I commenced HRT and anti-androgen tablets. This time I have less or no guilt about what I am doing. I am taking tablets under the counter and I don't recommend that to anyone. However, I am free to do what I want to my body.
I know I should probably be badgering my doctor about when I'm going to be referred. I intend to do some badgering very soon though.
I am somewhat enjoying the very gradual changes the female hormones are having on my body. Although, I am a bit worried at times about how obvious the changes may appear because I'm still not out to everyone as Transsexual. I have thought that when I can come out then I will not be so worried about the changes.
I consider myself undergoing an "unofficial" gender transition from now on. I want these changes to happen and will let them happen now.
Things I have noticed so far are mainly fat distribution. I'm sure my face shape is changing, however, I am unsure. Things are certainly happening in the breast department. In fact I have begun to have "growing pains" in that region. Even though these seem to be annoying yet cool at the same time.
My waist seems to changing and my trousers seem to fit easier now. My skin has become so much softer yet it is tending to become quite dry. I have resorted to the moisturising cream again. My hair has also become a lot drier.
Another positive thing that has happened is a drop in my male sex drive. I now no longer feel slave to that thing between my legs. I feel free to become aroused whenever I want instead when I don't want to be (like most of the time). It is allowing me to be more sensual with my feelings and thoughts about sex as well. I no longer have those burning urges to do something I feel I will regret. I feel I can be more romantic now and I am excited as ever with these prospects!
I'm looking to the future now and wondering how I would look. I'm looking at the future with a nervous excitement. I keep reassuring myself that I will be more feminine looking but I don't expect too much being a bit of a pessimist in the first place.
Well, I have had three sessions so far and my forth is coming very soon. I wasn't fazed at all by the process of removing my hair, and it just felt like any other day in my life. I wasn't exactly rejoicing but I felt happy with the results. I would describe it as taking away a shroud from my face and seeing through.
The crunch came very recently when I started to have more normal hair growth again. Luckily my close friend reminded me that hair grew in 6 week cycles.
I was surprised to find that I was actually mortified with what was happening to my face. I felt so upset about my hair coming through. This is how I worked out that I don't have any regrets about my hair removal. I now know that it was something I need to do for my own wellbeing and happiness.
One thing that played on my mind a bit was how my laser hair removal therapist had asked me twice whether I wanted my whole beard removed. In a way I couldn't understand why she was asking me this because in my mind it felt perfectly normal to remove my facial hair.
Then I somehow imagined how another person would think about removing all the hair from their face. I then thought to myself that a man wouldn't want to remove his facial hair because it is part of his masculinity.
I can't wait until the day when I have no hair on my face. I will feel content and comfortable. I feel closer to how my internal self wants my external self to be.
________________________________________________
As I stated in the subject title of this post it has now been 47 days since I commenced HRT and anti-androgen tablets. This time I have less or no guilt about what I am doing. I am taking tablets under the counter and I don't recommend that to anyone. However, I am free to do what I want to my body.
I know I should probably be badgering my doctor about when I'm going to be referred. I intend to do some badgering very soon though.
I am somewhat enjoying the very gradual changes the female hormones are having on my body. Although, I am a bit worried at times about how obvious the changes may appear because I'm still not out to everyone as Transsexual. I have thought that when I can come out then I will not be so worried about the changes.
I consider myself undergoing an "unofficial" gender transition from now on. I want these changes to happen and will let them happen now.
Things I have noticed so far are mainly fat distribution. I'm sure my face shape is changing, however, I am unsure. Things are certainly happening in the breast department. In fact I have begun to have "growing pains" in that region. Even though these seem to be annoying yet cool at the same time.
My waist seems to changing and my trousers seem to fit easier now. My skin has become so much softer yet it is tending to become quite dry. I have resorted to the moisturising cream again. My hair has also become a lot drier.
Another positive thing that has happened is a drop in my male sex drive. I now no longer feel slave to that thing between my legs. I feel free to become aroused whenever I want instead when I don't want to be (like most of the time). It is allowing me to be more sensual with my feelings and thoughts about sex as well. I no longer have those burning urges to do something I feel I will regret. I feel I can be more romantic now and I am excited as ever with these prospects!
I'm looking to the future now and wondering how I would look. I'm looking at the future with a nervous excitement. I keep reassuring myself that I will be more feminine looking but I don't expect too much being a bit of a pessimist in the first place.