sooo...........i dunno...
ugh... so im like really sick... like i dunno i didnt even realize how sick i was.. im in denial i guess.. lol like i have a really bad sinus infection and it just keeps gettin worsse and now its like in my lungs so i have to go bak to the doc. and get a stronger prescription.. which sucks.. cuz im already on like 2 prescriptions for my head...and my migranes.. its not fun at all... so lately i've been down... im gettin thru it tho...as much as i can! and im makin the best outta it..my mom keeps naggin me about school & cleanin my room and such.. but she doesnt kno how i feel rite now.. so screw it! but yeaa... & i hate the fact that.. my parents are divorced cuz.. my mom is consently sayin shit about my dad and visa versa.. and it really bothers me.. and like my little sister claire is at my dads and i barely see her....ever! and like shes always like.. danielle i wanna go w/ u... she 2 ok? and when i 2 year old looks at u and says i wanna go w/ u... thats sad... and makes u cry... its reallly rough on me.. and i hate it! i hate it so mucH!!! it makes me soo unhappy...specially when shes huggin me so hard and wont let me go becuz she doesnt want me to leave... it makes me so unhappy.. and i basically cry.. not in front of her.. i just stay strong... its hard tho....
& as much as my dad doesnt, i say he doesnt show his attention and love to me and doesnt call me or do things w/ me like he does w/ the boys.. i still love him.. and i just hope that someday he realizes that hes missing my life.. and like he can never get these days bak... we have so much to talk about.. but he never has time 4 me.. but he can go to a movie w/ the boys or go hunting w/ them or go their wrestling meets but cant even call me when i have some cosmo competition....or to ONCE say that he's proud of me.......
&& i feel like im losing some close friends of mine.. and it makes me really unhappy cuz i dunno what i'll do w/o them..... someone that i could always count on to make me happy.. is gettin distant.. and im sure its cuz i have a boyfriend and hes almost intimiated.. but i hate that! becuz friends come first.. and i love this kid so much... hes everything .... hes my husband.. and it makes me really unhappy to kno that we are becoming distant...i dont want that.....at all....but i geuss thats life.. and thats what happens when u get into a relationship? i duno... ? maybe im just dwelling on stuff thats not really that big of a deal and its not what i thnk and im overracting.. i hope that, thats the case.. cuz... i dont wanna lose any friends... specially him.....
i dont know... my lifes not all happy , fun and joy!.. id like to think it was... but i just deal w/ stuff differently... but lately this has been really difficult for me.. and i thank the people that are helpin me get thru my struggles... i just need to stay strong... and do the best i can... and smile.
& as much as my dad doesnt, i say he doesnt show his attention and love to me and doesnt call me or do things w/ me like he does w/ the boys.. i still love him.. and i just hope that someday he realizes that hes missing my life.. and like he can never get these days bak... we have so much to talk about.. but he never has time 4 me.. but he can go to a movie w/ the boys or go hunting w/ them or go their wrestling meets but cant even call me when i have some cosmo competition....or to ONCE say that he's proud of me.......
&& i feel like im losing some close friends of mine.. and it makes me really unhappy cuz i dunno what i'll do w/o them..... someone that i could always count on to make me happy.. is gettin distant.. and im sure its cuz i have a boyfriend and hes almost intimiated.. but i hate that! becuz friends come first.. and i love this kid so much... hes everything .... hes my husband.. and it makes me really unhappy to kno that we are becoming distant...i dont want that.....at all....but i geuss thats life.. and thats what happens when u get into a relationship? i duno... ? maybe im just dwelling on stuff thats not really that big of a deal and its not what i thnk and im overracting.. i hope that, thats the case.. cuz... i dont wanna lose any friends... specially him.....
i dont know... my lifes not all happy , fun and joy!.. id like to think it was... but i just deal w/ stuff differently... but lately this has been really difficult for me.. and i thank the people that are helpin me get thru my struggles... i just need to stay strong... and do the best i can... and smile.