I'm not a perfect person...
Just about every thing I've done lately seems profoundly self-defeating. For example, I just spent $20.00 to come over here and have no idea how I will afford to get back tommorow for work. And I've made promises to Jessica that I'm just not keeping, not because I don't care mind you...just for lack of will power. And...school is an extremely heavy burden this year. I'm overloading a course per semester to try and graduate but I need a B average first term before they will allow me overload second term. So basically I need B's to graduate and thus I have made a million promises to myself that I will work hard this year. That's a really scary thought though, I've heard myself utter those remarks before. But I really do have to just get it together and get more will power. My friends, my "quasi" girlfriend, school, my job; they are the most important things in the world to me right now and I feel like I've taken everyone for granted in some kind of a way. Whether or not my future will be a bright one rests alot on how things go with Jessica and how I handle school this year and so far I'm not doing a very good job with the one so I'm a little wary of how I'm going to handle the other. Please God just grant me the serentity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I hope everyone else is excited about school and not so stressed out as I am. Have a wonderful day and hopefully I'll get to see some of you Amherst people that I never see anymore someday soon.
Ben :)
Ben :)