Fresh start with my Livejournal for 2007
Pretty much the only thing to do when you are unemployed, after you've submitted so many resumes you'd like to vomit, is spend hours upon hours on the internet-- wasting your life away.
One good thing did come from that today tho. I got the chance to revamp this journal, because despite the fact that Myspace now offers me everything under the sun that I'd ever think about needing or wanting in a website (a monopoly I swear), I've got sentimental value attached to this journal-- July of 2007 I'll have 6 years of memories logged here and I'd like to keep using it for that reason alone, if not others.
I just signed off AIM. I hadn't been on in ages, but with things like AIM nothing much changes, even over a long period of time. The only reason I ever sign on there is to talk to Lins while she is at work, and that is often hit or miss. There are probably a lot of people I could IM, I mean I do have 129 buddies on my list. Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've heard?
Here is something else that is ridiculous. I cried today-- not a lot, but still. I cried about things that seem important when you are thinking about life logically and practically, but unimportant when you are someone like me who places much more value on personal relationships and such. It is money and job related matters that are upsetting me.
In 2006 I bounced from job to job and I have a good reason for why I left each and every job, but I am someone who finds routine so comfortable and I've been lacking in that when it comes to working. I want to do hair. I spent a lot of time and money learning to do hair, and I'm pretty good at it. And besides all of that, I feel like it's about time I settled into a real career and stopped working dead-end, minimum wage jobs that I absolutely hate. But, I feel like I keep hitting a brick wall.
I'd say 90%+ of the salons here are operated as lease only, aka booth rental. Now granted, that is the way to make the most money, and it offers exceptional flexibility. But, you have to find somewhere very busy and you have to bust ass promoting yourself, and most of all you have to have a grand or two to get yourself started and even then there is no promise of success and payoff. Now, do I seem like the kind of girl with a grand or two lying around? Absoutely not! I have $10,000 in student loans-- repayment started in December, just under $3000 in complete shit on my Visa (let's just call this stupidity), I have a cell phone bill, rent and utilities. I have living expenses! Most of all, I don't have a grand or two.
There are a handful of commission salons around here-- I've scoured the phone book dialing random salons just to find them, but even fewer that are hiring. I've put in the resumes and I've made the follow up calls, and now I just have to wait and hope that one will call me back. In the meantime, I am poor and I had to ask Graham to some of my bills this month (and felt so awful about it), and I'm willing to take just about any jobs that comes my way at this point. I've put somewhere around 20 resumes in since Saturday. And as luck would have it, I did have an interview Sunday at this cute little place called Lucky Dog Day and Night Care. It's a place for people who work to drop their dogs off for the day (it also serves as a kennel for people who are away for longer amounts of time). I interviewed with the owner for a position called "Dog handler" which basically means feeding, cleaning up after, traning, and playing with the dogs. She called me today for a follow-up interview tomorrow at noon. She wants me to meet and talk with her business partner, significant other, and two employees. I'm hoping for the best.
I also got a call today for an interview at SuperCuts tomorrow. I should feel happy about this on some level, but I can't seem to muster up any feeling other than that of desperation. I know that money is money and working some place like that would only be temporary. I should be focusing on those two things, so why do I still feel like it's not something I want? I know I shouldn't feel like I'm above working in a chain salon, but I can't help it. The thought of working there, makes me feel cheap and ashamed-- I wouldn't even want to tell anyone about it.
One of the reasons I wanted to move out of Ohio was so I wouldn't end up working some place like that. I wanted to move somewhere with more opportunities, somewhere with edgy salons where I could find one that would fit my personality and style. As a matter of pride, I'm going to allow a little bit of feeling sorry for myself right now.
I want both interviews to go well tomorrow for the pure sake of feeling more financially stable. And at the risk of being accused of counting my chickens before they hatch (or even worse, jinxing myself) I suppose that I wouldn't mind working both jobs. I know that the dog job is only 20-30 hours, so a combination is feesible. It's just hard to work something like that out-- because you fill out the applications in way that is most conducive to getting hired (i.e. complete availability) so then how do you approach them with the idea of working out a schedule where you can be at both jobs? Complications. I better just wait and see what happens.
I could say a lot more, but I don't want to get any more frustrated then I already am with that aspect of life.
One good thing did come from that today tho. I got the chance to revamp this journal, because despite the fact that Myspace now offers me everything under the sun that I'd ever think about needing or wanting in a website (a monopoly I swear), I've got sentimental value attached to this journal-- July of 2007 I'll have 6 years of memories logged here and I'd like to keep using it for that reason alone, if not others.
I just signed off AIM. I hadn't been on in ages, but with things like AIM nothing much changes, even over a long period of time. The only reason I ever sign on there is to talk to Lins while she is at work, and that is often hit or miss. There are probably a lot of people I could IM, I mean I do have 129 buddies on my list. Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've heard?
Here is something else that is ridiculous. I cried today-- not a lot, but still. I cried about things that seem important when you are thinking about life logically and practically, but unimportant when you are someone like me who places much more value on personal relationships and such. It is money and job related matters that are upsetting me.
In 2006 I bounced from job to job and I have a good reason for why I left each and every job, but I am someone who finds routine so comfortable and I've been lacking in that when it comes to working. I want to do hair. I spent a lot of time and money learning to do hair, and I'm pretty good at it. And besides all of that, I feel like it's about time I settled into a real career and stopped working dead-end, minimum wage jobs that I absolutely hate. But, I feel like I keep hitting a brick wall.
I'd say 90%+ of the salons here are operated as lease only, aka booth rental. Now granted, that is the way to make the most money, and it offers exceptional flexibility. But, you have to find somewhere very busy and you have to bust ass promoting yourself, and most of all you have to have a grand or two to get yourself started and even then there is no promise of success and payoff. Now, do I seem like the kind of girl with a grand or two lying around? Absoutely not! I have $10,000 in student loans-- repayment started in December, just under $3000 in complete shit on my Visa (let's just call this stupidity), I have a cell phone bill, rent and utilities. I have living expenses! Most of all, I don't have a grand or two.
There are a handful of commission salons around here-- I've scoured the phone book dialing random salons just to find them, but even fewer that are hiring. I've put in the resumes and I've made the follow up calls, and now I just have to wait and hope that one will call me back. In the meantime, I am poor and I had to ask Graham to some of my bills this month (and felt so awful about it), and I'm willing to take just about any jobs that comes my way at this point. I've put somewhere around 20 resumes in since Saturday. And as luck would have it, I did have an interview Sunday at this cute little place called Lucky Dog Day and Night Care. It's a place for people who work to drop their dogs off for the day (it also serves as a kennel for people who are away for longer amounts of time). I interviewed with the owner for a position called "Dog handler" which basically means feeding, cleaning up after, traning, and playing with the dogs. She called me today for a follow-up interview tomorrow at noon. She wants me to meet and talk with her business partner, significant other, and two employees. I'm hoping for the best.
I also got a call today for an interview at SuperCuts tomorrow. I should feel happy about this on some level, but I can't seem to muster up any feeling other than that of desperation. I know that money is money and working some place like that would only be temporary. I should be focusing on those two things, so why do I still feel like it's not something I want? I know I shouldn't feel like I'm above working in a chain salon, but I can't help it. The thought of working there, makes me feel cheap and ashamed-- I wouldn't even want to tell anyone about it.
One of the reasons I wanted to move out of Ohio was so I wouldn't end up working some place like that. I wanted to move somewhere with more opportunities, somewhere with edgy salons where I could find one that would fit my personality and style. As a matter of pride, I'm going to allow a little bit of feeling sorry for myself right now.
I want both interviews to go well tomorrow for the pure sake of feeling more financially stable. And at the risk of being accused of counting my chickens before they hatch (or even worse, jinxing myself) I suppose that I wouldn't mind working both jobs. I know that the dog job is only 20-30 hours, so a combination is feesible. It's just hard to work something like that out-- because you fill out the applications in way that is most conducive to getting hired (i.e. complete availability) so then how do you approach them with the idea of working out a schedule where you can be at both jobs? Complications. I better just wait and see what happens.
I could say a lot more, but I don't want to get any more frustrated then I already am with that aspect of life.