more santa than sane
First, a triptych of images from my weekend. They aren't mine; I just searched Flickr for "Tesla Claus":
Santarchy was pretty awesome. I staggered around the streets with a thousand other bogus Santas drinking Shiner Bock out of a Pine-Sol bottle (it was lemony-fresh, I couldn't get all the taste out) and tequila out of a flask. Owen had the brilliant idea that I should bring the shock box and go as Tesla Claus. I put a shiny foil ball with pipe-cleaner lightning on my Santa hat and Meg cut out letters for my suit. It was a pretty big hit and I must have zapped the pee out of two hundred people -- at one point I had eight people standing in a circle holding hands while I electrocuted them all, writhing and screaming. It was sort of surprising to me how many people were more than willing to be electrocuted by a man drinking out of a bottle of Pine-Sol. I myself would probably be more inclined to suspicion.
We crashed the front steps of a church as a wedding let out. We raided a strip club and paid off the DJ to let the Santa-girls get up on stage and strip. We took over a Macy's. And, miraculously, none of us were taken away in a paddy wagon.
I've been in a weird frame of mind for the last few days. Or, rather, it's a return to my old, familiar obsessiveness. It's a good thing, I think -- it beats being bored.
A cheerful holiday tune for you all. Chas, I hope this one finds its way into a holiday mix. Not every Christmas tune includes the line:
the bottle is empty, the sleigh has a flat
the stripper in my bed is ugly and fat
her tassels are tangled and what's worse my jingle won't jangle
Merry Christmas, you bastards.
Santarchy was pretty awesome. I staggered around the streets with a thousand other bogus Santas drinking Shiner Bock out of a Pine-Sol bottle (it was lemony-fresh, I couldn't get all the taste out) and tequila out of a flask. Owen had the brilliant idea that I should bring the shock box and go as Tesla Claus. I put a shiny foil ball with pipe-cleaner lightning on my Santa hat and Meg cut out letters for my suit. It was a pretty big hit and I must have zapped the pee out of two hundred people -- at one point I had eight people standing in a circle holding hands while I electrocuted them all, writhing and screaming. It was sort of surprising to me how many people were more than willing to be electrocuted by a man drinking out of a bottle of Pine-Sol. I myself would probably be more inclined to suspicion.
We crashed the front steps of a church as a wedding let out. We raided a strip club and paid off the DJ to let the Santa-girls get up on stage and strip. We took over a Macy's. And, miraculously, none of us were taken away in a paddy wagon.
I've been in a weird frame of mind for the last few days. Or, rather, it's a return to my old, familiar obsessiveness. It's a good thing, I think -- it beats being bored.
A cheerful holiday tune for you all. Chas, I hope this one finds its way into a holiday mix. Not every Christmas tune includes the line:
the bottle is empty, the sleigh has a flat
the stripper in my bed is ugly and fat
her tassels are tangled and what's worse my jingle won't jangle
Merry Christmas, you bastards.