What will a happy ending look like for "Breq"?
Because at least 
stultiloquentia is interested. :) And before I get so far into Ancillary Mercy that the questions are all answered. (I am ~130 pages along.)
Since finishing the second book in January, I've been thinking about what a happy ending could look like for Justice of Toren One Esk Nineteen. Because there's a list of possibilities for what won't be happy:
- I'm not convinced Justice of Toren was really destroyed. As incredible as she is, Nineteen/Breq made some suppositions about what the flash meant that she saw 20 years ago, and has proceeded since then as if the ship's destruction were fact. It might be -- but it might not be. So, suppose Justice of Toren were to reappear at some point during Ancillary Mercy. That would be wonderful. But it wouldn't prove the ultimate fulfilment for Nineteen. Because she misses being a ship, misses having/being ancillaries, and she couldn't become part of Toren again. Not without losing herself. If she were to hook back in to the ship, her 20 years of independent identity would be subsumed into the larger AI.
- Same deal with Mercy of Kalr. Ship has done some sweet and downright heartbreaking things to comfort and support Nineteen, and it clearly misses its ancillaries. But if it were to offer some kind of merge, again, Nineteen wouldn't be what she is now anymore. And perhaps neither would Mercy of Kalr.
- Okay, but what if Nineteen were to encounter an empty ship, or be gifted with a new one, that didn't have a preexisting AI? What if she could upload herself into it? Still not ideal, because she'd lack the many organic bodies that extend and complete her lived experience. Use humans? They aren't the same as ancillaries, as Ancillary Sword emphasizes again and again. Use ancillaries? Even if the Anaander Mianaai who permits the making of ancillaries wins the civil war, creating decades of them would be so morally questionable that it would cast a shadow over Nineteen's character. If Nineteen were even willing to do it. Which I'd like to doubt.
- Nineteen could remain alone. Perhaps she'd find some satisfaction in choosing to remain alone, if an opportunity arose to regain some or all of what she'd lost and she realized she wasn't willing to give up the person she'd become. But she would be lonely. She has cried, receiving a hug from a human pretending to be a fellow ancillary. She has cried, thinking of how she'll never be loved by a fellow ship.
- She could die. She could die doing something heroic and amazing and self-fulfilling. She could die performing some small act or through some fluke of fate that she's accepted could happen at any time since she lost herself and decided to pursue her revenge against Mianaai. She could die a century from now after the war somehow ends, having lived as fulfilling a life as she could manage after being cut off from the rest of her multi-bodied self. Either way, it wouldn't really be a happy ending.
So I wonder: What form will her happy ending take? I think -- I hope -- her ending will be happy. Her certainty that she will never again enjoy what she once had only makes me suspect more strongly that she'll be proven wrong. Will it be a decision to remain independent? Will she find fulfilment in a relationship with a fellow ancillary (another Toren ancillary?) or human (Seivarden?) -- doubtful, but possibly nice, since it probably wouldn't happen in a "love conquers all" sort of trite way -- or even with a ship? Will there be some Presger magic? Has Nineteen misunderstood something fundamental that would change the deductions outlined above?
What I like about such musing is expecting that since I haven't been able to put my finger on the solution, there is something at the end of this book that I haven't figured out, and it's going to be wonderful to find out what it is. Even if it is only to discover that the best ending is a bittersweet compromise.
And also that whatever the solution is -- or the details of the lack of solution -- will crystallize the statements about identity and finding a place in the universe that have been so beautifully woven throughout the series.
(Nineteen, Seivarden, Tisarwat, Mercy of Kalr, Ekalu, even Awn, all misfits, trying to find a place where they can belong and be comfortable. Nineteen, Dlique/Zeiat, new spoilery character in Ancillary Mercy, all with their slippery names. Oh, I just love it so.)
Originally posted at http://bironic.dreamwidth.org/324070.html, where there are
comments.
stultiloquentia is interested. :) And before I get so far into Ancillary Mercy that the questions are all answered. (I am ~130 pages along.)
Since finishing the second book in January, I've been thinking about what a happy ending could look like for Justice of Toren One Esk Nineteen. Because there's a list of possibilities for what won't be happy:
- I'm not convinced Justice of Toren was really destroyed. As incredible as she is, Nineteen/Breq made some suppositions about what the flash meant that she saw 20 years ago, and has proceeded since then as if the ship's destruction were fact. It might be -- but it might not be. So, suppose Justice of Toren were to reappear at some point during Ancillary Mercy. That would be wonderful. But it wouldn't prove the ultimate fulfilment for Nineteen. Because she misses being a ship, misses having/being ancillaries, and she couldn't become part of Toren again. Not without losing herself. If she were to hook back in to the ship, her 20 years of independent identity would be subsumed into the larger AI.
- Same deal with Mercy of Kalr. Ship has done some sweet and downright heartbreaking things to comfort and support Nineteen, and it clearly misses its ancillaries. But if it were to offer some kind of merge, again, Nineteen wouldn't be what she is now anymore. And perhaps neither would Mercy of Kalr.
- Okay, but what if Nineteen were to encounter an empty ship, or be gifted with a new one, that didn't have a preexisting AI? What if she could upload herself into it? Still not ideal, because she'd lack the many organic bodies that extend and complete her lived experience. Use humans? They aren't the same as ancillaries, as Ancillary Sword emphasizes again and again. Use ancillaries? Even if the Anaander Mianaai who permits the making of ancillaries wins the civil war, creating decades of them would be so morally questionable that it would cast a shadow over Nineteen's character. If Nineteen were even willing to do it. Which I'd like to doubt.
- Nineteen could remain alone. Perhaps she'd find some satisfaction in choosing to remain alone, if an opportunity arose to regain some or all of what she'd lost and she realized she wasn't willing to give up the person she'd become. But she would be lonely. She has cried, receiving a hug from a human pretending to be a fellow ancillary. She has cried, thinking of how she'll never be loved by a fellow ship.
- She could die. She could die doing something heroic and amazing and self-fulfilling. She could die performing some small act or through some fluke of fate that she's accepted could happen at any time since she lost herself and decided to pursue her revenge against Mianaai. She could die a century from now after the war somehow ends, having lived as fulfilling a life as she could manage after being cut off from the rest of her multi-bodied self. Either way, it wouldn't really be a happy ending.
So I wonder: What form will her happy ending take? I think -- I hope -- her ending will be happy. Her certainty that she will never again enjoy what she once had only makes me suspect more strongly that she'll be proven wrong. Will it be a decision to remain independent? Will she find fulfilment in a relationship with a fellow ancillary (another Toren ancillary?) or human (Seivarden?) -- doubtful, but possibly nice, since it probably wouldn't happen in a "love conquers all" sort of trite way -- or even with a ship? Will there be some Presger magic? Has Nineteen misunderstood something fundamental that would change the deductions outlined above?
What I like about such musing is expecting that since I haven't been able to put my finger on the solution, there is something at the end of this book that I haven't figured out, and it's going to be wonderful to find out what it is. Even if it is only to discover that the best ending is a bittersweet compromise.
And also that whatever the solution is -- or the details of the lack of solution -- will crystallize the statements about identity and finding a place in the universe that have been so beautifully woven throughout the series.
(Nineteen, Seivarden, Tisarwat, Mercy of Kalr, Ekalu, even Awn, all misfits, trying to find a place where they can belong and be comfortable. Nineteen, Dlique/Zeiat, new spoilery character in Ancillary Mercy, all with their slippery names. Oh, I just love it so.)
Originally posted at http://bironic.dreamwidth.org/324070.html, where there are
comments.