[ Collective Thoughts ] : arms.
am i aware or unaware of what is becoming of myself.
if anything, i want to create more. make more. throw my art, my visions, my fashion, my appreciation and my love into one giant piece.. and show the world how large that brain of mine is. i haven't felt quite fabulous lately. may that be because i unintentionally disconnect myself from people dearest to my heart, or may it be because im so tired.. and so unfulfilled with myself.
I'll be honest. i hate my appearance. make it so that i want to feel 100% with my own body and soul.. but its a long way to the top.
the last week has been a cluster fuck of problems and working towards the future. but i don't know if im excited or scared. excited for the opportunity to make amends to the problems I've created and begin and plan for the things to come. or scared that I've let my dreams slip away or I've left what i want to become of myself slip from my hands too quickly. all that i know, is that im an alright person. i broke down Saturday in my car for an hour crying, my car got broken into Saturday, i got very drunk Friday/Saturday/Sunday, i couldn't get to see one of my good friends who came down to Melbourne for the weekend, one of my back upper teeth has broken, my parents wouldn't help me with anything, practically everyone is throwing their problems on my shoulders.. and without the slightest regard of how i feel.
i was tempted the other day to pack some clothes and run away for a few days.
if anything, i want to create more. make more. throw my art, my visions, my fashion, my appreciation and my love into one giant piece.. and show the world how large that brain of mine is. i haven't felt quite fabulous lately. may that be because i unintentionally disconnect myself from people dearest to my heart, or may it be because im so tired.. and so unfulfilled with myself.
I'll be honest. i hate my appearance. make it so that i want to feel 100% with my own body and soul.. but its a long way to the top.
the last week has been a cluster fuck of problems and working towards the future. but i don't know if im excited or scared. excited for the opportunity to make amends to the problems I've created and begin and plan for the things to come. or scared that I've let my dreams slip away or I've left what i want to become of myself slip from my hands too quickly. all that i know, is that im an alright person. i broke down Saturday in my car for an hour crying, my car got broken into Saturday, i got very drunk Friday/Saturday/Sunday, i couldn't get to see one of my good friends who came down to Melbourne for the weekend, one of my back upper teeth has broken, my parents wouldn't help me with anything, practically everyone is throwing their problems on my shoulders.. and without the slightest regard of how i feel.
i was tempted the other day to pack some clothes and run away for a few days.