Baby Update
As promised, here's the baby update. My wife, Butters, and innumerable other people who mocked me were wrong, and I am now eagerly awaiting the birth of my son. The name we have currently agreed on is William Patrick Jewell, but I am open to other options since my wife is not wild about it. If anyone has suggestions, I would gratefully take them under consideration as part of the Great Name Bob's Kid Sweepstakes! Yes, that's right kids, you too can have a say in the label we give our child for the rest of his natural life! Just send your suggestions on a 3.618 x 5.00003862 inch card to
NAME BOB'S KID SWEEPSTAKES
P.O. Box 4512
Piscataway, NJ
12345
Our judges will carefully consider each and every name, unless they suck, and if your name is selected, you will be notified in 10-129 weeks. The winner will receive the right to Pay for my kid's college! Yes, that's right, you will be allowed to fund my child's higher education so that I may retire a happy and debt-free man! So get those cards in the mail, because today might be your lucky day!
Offer void where prohibited. No substitutions, exchanges or refunds.
NAME BOB'S KID SWEEPSTAKES
P.O. Box 4512
Piscataway, NJ
12345
Our judges will carefully consider each and every name, unless they suck, and if your name is selected, you will be notified in 10-129 weeks. The winner will receive the right to Pay for my kid's college! Yes, that's right, you will be allowed to fund my child's higher education so that I may retire a happy and debt-free man! So get those cards in the mail, because today might be your lucky day!
Offer void where prohibited. No substitutions, exchanges or refunds.